THE  LIBRARY 

OF 

THE  UNIVERSITY 
OF  CALIFORNIA 

LOS  ANGELES 


71' 


- 


THE 


VISION  OF  JUDGMENT, 


THE  SOUTH  CHURCH: 


ECCLESIASTICAL     COUNCILS 


VIEWED    FROM 


CELESTIAL  AND  SATANIC  STAND-POINTS. 

&       f  ..  ' 

By  Quevedo  Redivivus,  Jr. 


NEW  YORK: 

VAN  EVRIE,  HORTON  &  CO., 

162  Nassau  Street. 

1867. 


Entered,  according  to  Act  of  Congress,  in  the  year  1867, 

By  R.  W.  WRIGHT, 
In  the  Clerk's  Office  of  the  District  Court  of  the  District  of  Connecticut. 


PREFACE. 


Brevity  is  the  life  of  a  preface  as  it  is  the  soul  of  wit.  And  this  is 
infallibly  true  of  all  prefaces.  None  are  ever  read,  or  ever  should  be, 
unless  spiced  with  this  essential  element  of  wit.  Not  that  a  brief 
preface  is  necessarily  witty,  or  a  witty  one  brief;  but,  its  office  being 
simply  that  of  a  personal  introduction,  anything  like  tediousness  is 
intolerable.  Whatever  the  author  may  say  of  himself,  therefore,  or  of 
his  "  literary  bantling,"  will  be  rigidly  brief  and  to  the  point.  In  as- 
suming the  qualified  title,  and  the  nom  de  plume,  to  one  of  the  most  spirit- 
ed and  pungent  satires  ever  written,  he  neither  challenges  criticism, 
nor  declines  it.  As  he  makes  no  pretension  to  having  reached  the 
splendid  original,  so  he  offers  no  apology  for  having  fallen  below  it. 
What  he  has  written  must  stand  or  fall  on  its  own  merits,  and  will  do 
so,  in  spite  of  censure  or  praise.  All  that  he  claims  is,  that  the  poem 
is  TBUTH,  as  seen  from  his  stand-point.  Whether  it  be  living  Satire  or 
not,  is  another  question,  and  one  on  which  it  would  be  the  height  of 
presumption  for  him  to  pass  judgment.  It  was  written  in  the  autumn 
and  winter  of  1864-5,  and  has  only  seen  the  light,  because  of  the  flat- 
tering, and,  it  may  be,  too  partial  opinion  expressed  of  it  by  a  few 
literary  friends.  The  only  thing  the  author  regrets  is,  that  it  is  pub- 


462464 


IV  PREFACE. 

lished  at  a  time  when  an  impartial  criticism  is  impossible.  The  Pulpit 
of  the  country  has  so  intensified  the  political  animosities  and  hates  of 
the  American  people,  that  there  is  no  part  of  the  habitable  globe  where 
there  is  so  much  passion,  prejudice,  and  rank,  disreputable  error, 
to  cloud  the  individual  judgment,  as  in  the  United  States,  at  the  pres- 
ent time.  But  this  cannot  always  be.  The  Political  Pulpit  is  bound 
to  break  down  by  the  weight  of  its  own  infamy,  and,  when  that  time 
comes,  the  satirical  pen  may  safely  turn  its  mummeries  into  ridicule. 
"Well  will  it  be  with  America,  when  she  joyfully  hails  her  coming 
Satirist,  and  welcomes  the  lash  with  which  her  follies  are  scourged 
from  the  light  of  day. 


THE  VISION  OF  JUDGMENT. 


Host.    "  I  have  known  thee  these  twenty-nine  years,  come  peascod  time." 

King  Henry  IV. 

Stew.    "  What  dost  thou  know  me  for  ?" 

Kent.  "  A  knave ;  a  rascal ;  a  lily-livered,  super-serviceable,  finical  rogue ; 
one  whom  I  will  beat  into  clamorous  whining,  if  thou  deny'st  the 
least  syllable  of  thy  addition." 

King  Lear. 

Dum.    "  Most  rare  Pompey ! 
Boyet.   Renowned  Pompey ! 

Biron.   Greater  than  great,  great,  great,  great  Pompey  !  Pompey,  the  huge  !' 

Love's  Labor  Lost. 


CANTO  THE  FIRST. 

i. 

SAINT  Peter  wept  at  the  celestial  gate : 
His  keys  were  gone — clean  rusted  were  they  out, 

So  closely  had  the  devil  kept  of  late 

A  watch  for  souls  that  wandered  thereabout; 

And  by  his  side  the  last  lost  Peri  sate,  1 
Weeping  to  see  the  fearful  rabble-rout, 

Or  ghostly  throng,  that  took  the  other  way, — 

The  devil's  pike  that  shunned  the  gates  of  day. 
1 


II. 

The  angels  all  were  harping  on  one  string, 
A  single  note  harmonious  filled  the  sky  ; 

No  seraph  ventured  to  unfurl  his  wing, 

Lest  soaring  upward  he  might  soar  too  high, 

And  on  himself  celestial  umbrage  bring, 
For  thus  disturbing  heaven's  equality  ; 

For  heaven,  like  earth,  was  in  one  mighty  pother, 

Lest  some  one  angel  should  o'ertop  another. 

III. 

One  guardian  seraph  only  kept  the  earth  : 
The  rest  had  all  retired  at  length  on  high, 

Finding  their  charges  here  of  little  worth, 
Save  to  provoke  the  laughter  of  the  sky, 

Or  some  sheer  outburst  of  celestial  mirth, 
As  folly  stalked  more  impudently  by ; 

Wearing  her  cap  and  bells  as  proof  to  show 

That  fools  commissioned  ruled  the  earth  below. 

IV. 

The  swift  recording  angel  drove  his  quill 
With  such  celerity,  it  seemed  to  fly 

And  dart  its  record  down  of  human  ill, 
As  erst  the  lightning  leapt  from  murky  sky 

On  Jove-defiant  Titans  it  would  kill ; 
And  yet  the  record,  in  its  darkest  dye, 

Was  incomplete  :  not  half  the  ills  were  shown, 

And  those  that  were  so,  were  not  half  writ  down. 


V. 

Volume  on  volume  swelled  the  black  bureau, 
As.  with  his  flashing,  diamond-pointed  pen, 

He  struck  the  balances  of  human  woe 

'Gainst some  "three  thousand  fighting  clergymen' 

Priests  of  Bellona,  as  their  garments  show  ; 
Whom  now  the  world  might  honor,  not  contemn. 

If,  like  the  Bellonarii  of  Rome,  2 

The  blood  they  shed,  had  only  been  their  own  ! 

VI. 

The  one  rapt  seraph  that  remained  on  earth, 
Seemed  with  angelic  pity  to  look  down 

On  the  mad  revel  and  unseemly  mirth  3 

That  'mid  sepulchral  horrors  filled  the  town  ; 

For  never  since  this  planet  had  its  birth 
From  out  of  chaos  wild,  had  there  been  known 

A  more  incongruous  and  discordant  jar 

Than  now  uprose  from  din  of  mirth  and  war. 

VII. 

Awhile  the  seraph  pondered  as  in  doubt 
Whether  to  take  her  v«p\vard  flight  or  stay 

And  see  this  horrid  hurly-burly  out, — 
This  mirth  in  death  and  death  in  revelry ; 

And  as  she  lingered,  there  uprose  a  shout 
That  died  not  in  the  distance  far  away, 

But  swelled  in  volume  as  it  swept  along 

From  distant  field  of  carnage  whence  it  sprung. 


Till. 

Some  thirty  thousand  had  gone  down  that  day 
On  the  red  field  of  death,  and  still  the  thirst 

For  blood  was  unappeased.    The  mangled  lay 
In  fragments  strewn,  as  if  the  fiends  accurst 

Had  played  on  them  with  hell's  artillery, 

Shotted  with  "  devils  damn'd" — all  quick  to  burst 

In  shrieks  and  yells  upon  the  affrighted  air, 

Those  messengers  of  death  that  hurtled  there ! 

IX. 

Fierce  raged  the  conflict — Greek  to  Greek  the  foe ; 

Columns  'gainst  columns  dashed  like  walls  of  fire 
Darting  their  lurid  death-flames  to  and  fro, 

As  darl  the  lightnings  from  two  clouds  in  ire, 
Marshaling  their  thunders  for  the  dread  "  set  to" — 

The  final  struggle  of  the  powers  of  air  ; 
One  fearful  crash  as  if  the  heavens  were  rent, 
And  backward  they  recoil,  their  forces  spent. 

X. 

'Twas  thus  they  fought,  and  thus  they  fighting  fell, 
These  Anglo-Saxon  tigers  on  the  field, 

Without  a  passion  in  their  breasts  to  quell, 
Save  the  undying  purpose  not  to  yield ; 

And  this  from  passion  grew  to  passion's  spell, 
At  once  a  helmet,  buckler,  sword  and  shield : 

And  so  Death  held  high  carnival  the  while, 

In  blood  that  flowed  from  Abolition  bile ; 


9 

XL 

But  not  from  Abolition  veins.     Oh,  no ; 

Such  diabolic  blood  as  this  to  spill 
Had  been,  upon  the  part  of  Death,  a  blow 

Aimed  at  the  very  sovereignty  of  hell ; 
And  Lucifer  had  stood  aghast,  with  brow 

In  triple  horror  knit,  at  thought  of  ill 
So  threatening  to  his  sovereignty  and  state, 
As  having  in  hell  a  set  so  reprobate  ! 

XII. 

And  so  Death  played  the  pantomime,  and  gave 
Himself  all  forms  and  shapes  and  qualities, 

As  if  his  mission  were  to  play  the  knave ; 
Ensocketing  his  ghastly  skull  with  eyes 

That  flamed  like  basilisks',  that  he  might  have 
The  power  to  strike  men  blind,  or  on  them  seize 

With  such  stark  horror  as  to  freeze  to  stone 

Their  every  muscle,  fibre,  tissue,  bone ! 

XIII. 

And  wore  upon  his  breast  a  fiery  shield, 
Embossed  with  gorgons'  heads,  each  one  as  dire 

As  that  by  Perseus  borne  in  starry  field;  4 
And  thus  arrayed,  he  quenched  the  fierce  desire 

Of  these  mad  Jacobins  for  war,  who  spoiled 
For  fight  at  first,  but  when  it  came  in  fire 

And  blood,  and  wrapt  the  Nation's  heart  in  flame, 

Preferred  all  other  deaths  to  dying  "game." 


10 

XIV. 

And  so  they  lived — these  valiant  men  of  war — 
Like  those  who  fought,  and,  fighting,  ran  away, 

Lest  being  hoisted  with  their  own  petard, 
They  might  not  live  to  fight  another  day ; 

And  thus  hell  'scaped  all  temporary  jar, 
Through  Death's  adroitness  and  dexterity ; 

He  substituting  "  horrors"  on  the  brain, 

For  the  "  spent  negro,"  as  a  coup  de  main  ! 

XV. 

And  a  grand  coup  it  proved.     That  mighty  number — 
The  fierce  "nine  hundred  thousand  Tribune  men" — 5 

Who  never  smelt  gun-powder,  for  a  wonder, 
And  never  meant  to,  till  "Old  Abraham's" pen 

Should  "knock  the  sand,"  with  one  broad  sweep,  from  under 
The  Constitution— "our  great  curse  and  bane;" 

When  they  were  all  to  rush  like  tigers  forth, 

And  vindicate  the  honor  of  the  North  ! 

XVI. 

This  mighty  host  "in  buckram" — Greeley's  men, — 
Who  bravely  snuffed  the  battle  from  afar, 

No  sooner  got  "  Death's  horrors"  on  the  brain, 

Than,  like  Job's  war-horse,  they  cried  out  "Ha,  ha !" 

Yet  not  like  him  to  paw  the  battle  plain, 
Or  clothe  themselves  in  thunder  for  the  war ; 

But  skulk  behind  their  famous  "  Loyal  Leagues," 

Where  they  might  hatch  anew  their  vile  intrigues. 


11 


XVII. 

And  there  these  precious  incubators  sat, 
To  moult  each  traitorous  Abolition  feather 

For  "loyal"  plumage,  as  if  this  for  that 

Could  be  thus  mewed  to  suit  the  wind  or  weather; 

Or  they  could  hide  the  baldest  traitor's  pate, 
As  vultures  theirs,  with  head  and  wing  together ; 

Or  could,  by  putting  on  their  "loyal"  airs, 

Cover  the  traitor's  as  the  ass's  ears  ! 

XVIII. 

Saint  Peter  wept  at  the  celestial  gate  : 
How  long  he  had  been  weeping  no  one  knew, 

Save  that  the  grass-grown  pavement  where  he  sate, 
Was  covered  most  profusely  with  the  dew 

Of  his  spent  grief,  or  seemed  at  any  rate 
To  be  thus  covered,  as  his  grief  now  grew, 

By  a  transition  strangely  quick  and  sudden, 

Into  a  fit  of — apostolic  dudgeon  ! 

XIX. 

Over  against  the  sapphire  walls  he  heard 
A  most  confused  and  supernatural  clatter 

Of  human  tongues,  as  if  by  demons  stirred 
To  mutiny  and  strife,  about  some  matter 

He  knew  not  of  what  moment,  nor  much  cared ; 
Only  it  seemed  his  tympanum  to  shatter,  6 

As  if  some  comet  from  the  etherial  voids, 

Had  smashed  the  earth  up  into  asteroids  ! 


12 
xx. 

And  taking  up  his  telescope,  he  swept 
At  first  the  outer  rim  of  that  vast  sea, 

Whereon  each  universe,  in  order  kept, 

Discoursed  the  mighty  spherics  of  the  sky ; 

But  finding  nothing  out  of  place  except 
A  star  or  two,  that  went  "  skedaddling"  by, 

He  brought  his  instrument  at  length  to  bear 

Upon  the  only  "  fallen"  planet  there. 

XXI. 

And  much  to  his  surprise,  he  found  it  whole, 
And  not  in  fragments  strewn,  as  he  expected  ; 

Although  he  thought  it  reeled  about  its  pole 
With  its  obliquity  somewhat  affected 

By  the  last  comet,  in  its  lawless  stroll ; 

And  while  thus  looking,  fancied  he  detected 

Some  fiery  perturbations  on  its  crust, 

Like  old  Vesuvius  on  another  "  bust." 

XXII. 

And  then  he  turned  and  asked  the  radiant  Peri 
That  still  sat  weeping  at  the  gates  of  light, 

If  her  celestial  tympanum  were  weary 
Of  mortal  sound,  or  eye  of  mortal  sight ; 

If  not,  he'd  like  to  have  her  solve  a  query 
That  now  began  to  have  perplexing  weight 

With  him  at  least ;  for  since  the  birth  of  matter, 

There'd  not  been  heard  in  heaven  so  vile  a  clatter, 


13 

XXIII. 

As  smote  upon  celestial  ears  that  day, 

And  stirred  within  his  breast  a  touch  of  anger ; 

And  if  the  Peri  would  now  wing  her  way 

(Which  she  might  do  without  material  danger, 

Since  hers  was  not  a  frame  that  mortal  clay 
Could  taint,)  to  that  terrestrial  dog-in-manger 

Planet,  that  on  its  oblique  axis  whirls 

Between  the  upper  and  the  nether  worlds, 

XXIV. 

And  ascertain  the  cause  of  all  this  strife, 
And  bear  report  of  what  she  learned  to  heaven, 

He'd  ope  to  her  again  the  gates  of  life, 

With  all  her  erring  past  at  once  forgiven  : — 

The  Peri  heard  and  dashed  aside  her  grief 
As  if  the  pall  of  glory  had  been  riven, 

And  flashes  of  celestial  light  had  burst 

Upon  her  soul,  so  long  for  heaven  athirst ! 

XXV. 

And  upward  bounds  a  starry  thing  of  light, 
And  on  her  flashing  pinions  darts  away, 

Skirting  at  first  the  confines  of  old  Night 
And  then  the  flaming  corridors  of  Day, 

As  if  she  sought,  in  her  impetuous  flight, 
To  gain  some  point  from  which  she  might  survey 

The  far  out-reaching  distance,  as  it  ran, 

From  heaven  to  earth — from  seraph  down  to  man. 


14 


XXVI. 

Awhile  she  hovered  o'er  this  "  vasty  deep," 
As  if  she  felt  the  fearful  gift  of  wings  ; 

A  feeling  that  we  sometimes  have  in  sleep 

When  conscience  too  much  troubles  with  its  stings, 

And  we  essay  to  fly  some  donjon-keep, 

Or  span  the  gulf  where  demon  laughter  rings ; 

A  thousand  fathoms  plumb  we  fall  at  once, 

And  yet  awake  without  a  broken  sconce. 

XXVII. 

So  dropped  the  radiant  Peri  from  on  high  : 
Nine  times  the  space  the  last  great  comet  swept 

By  its  broad  pennon  streaming  on  the  sky, 
Plump  down  she  fell,  nor  thought  to  intercept 

Her  flight  until  she  reached  the  Milky-Way — 

That  glittering  pavement  where  the  stars  still  kept 

Their  place  in  heaven,  nor  madly  sought  to  rush 

From  out  their  spheres,  some  other  world  to  crush  ! 

XXVIII. 

And  reaching  now  the  outer  bounds  of  space, 

Along  the  distant  star-swept  galaxy, 
Where  heaven  begins  and  cosmic  wonders  cease, 

The  Peri  lights  upon  a  nebulae, 
Or  Magellanic  cloud,  that  holds  its  place  7 

High  up  the  mighty  archway  of  the  sky 
That  props  the  stars ;  where  Orphiucus  rides  8 
His  scaly  monster  with  his  glistening  sides. 


15 

XXIX. 

And  stayed  her  flight  awhile,  as  if  to  take 
Her  reckoning  by  the  lights  that  dimly  shone 

Along  the  old  Chaldean  zodiac ;  9 

Where  daring  mortals,  mortals  dared  enthrone, 

Displacing  gods,  gods  of  themselves  to  make; 
As  if  the  heavens  were  theirs,  and  sun  and  moon 

And  stars,  and  all  within  the  glittering  cope, 

Were  simply  made  to  point  a  telescope. 

XXX. 

Her  flight  resumed,  she  cleaves  the  nether  air, 
Or  rather  ether,  with  her  wings  outspread, 

And  guided  by  the  light  of  falling  star, 

Ohance  hurled  from  high,  and  flaming  as  it  sped, 

She  makes  the  star-loved  pathway  that  is  near; 
That  glittering  pavement  that  is  "  thick  inlaid 

With  patins  of  bright  gold,"  where  seraphs  fly 

Upon  their  angel  errands  through  the  sky,  10 

XXXT. 

A.nd  now  with  swift  and  sight-outrunning  speed 
Earthward  she  makes  her  way,  a  thing  of  light, 

Dashing  the  stars  aside  like  fiery  steed 
Seen  in  prophetic  visions  of  the  night ; 

While  all  the  glittering  host  about  her  fade, 
Or  rather  pale  their  fires  to  mortal  sight : 

So  radiantly  the  Peri  flashes  forth, 

An  astronomic  wonder  to  the  earth  ! 


16 


XXXII. 

Old  Yale,  as  usual,  is  the  first  to  bring 
Her  achromatic  instrument  to  hear  1  l 

Upon  the  stranger  with  the  flashing  wing, 
Hitting  her  declination  to  a  hair ; 

And  satisfied  with  this,  essays  a  fling 

At  Cambridge,  perched  in  astronomic  chair, 

Whose  sleepy  Magi  all  their  gumption  tax, 

In  vain  attempts  to  get  her  parallax  !  1 2 

XXXIII. 

Meanwhile  she  burns  upon  the  evening  sky 
With  such  intensity,  she  seems  to  throw 

The  most  imperial  star-gem  set  on  high 
Into  eclipse  by  her  imperial  glow ; 

Still  flaming  on  her  course,  a  fiery  eye 
That  darts  into  men's  souls,  as  if  to  know 

The  secret  workings  of  each  human  heart, 

Whether  to  heaven  allied,  or  hell,  or  what. 

XXXIV. 

And  when  at  length  she  nears  the  outmost  strata 
Of  cosmic  ether  (as  our  atmosphere 

Is  vaguely  called  by  modern  nomenclator,) 
Her  fiery  aspects  cease  and  disappear, 

And  that  so  suddenly,  it  knocks  all  data 
By  telescope  obtained  while  poked  at  her ; 

Yale  first  involves  the  mystery  deep  in  doubt, 

Then  thinks  another  world  has  been  snuffed  out ! 


17 

XXXV. 

And  while  she  takes  her  mammoth  star-chart  down 
To  note  the  place  of  this  celestial  wonder, 

The  radiant  Peri  lights  within  the  town; 
Dashing  a  sky-mere  cloud  or  two  in  sunder, 

Down  whose  bright  rifts  the  laughing  moonbeams  shone, 
Dappling  the  graveled  walks  the  broad  elms  under 

With  fleckered  light,  that  leapt  their  foliage  through, 

And  fell  a  shower  of  pearls  along  the  dew ! 

«  XXXVI. 

It  was  a  Sabbath  evening.    Far  and  near 
The  bells  pealed  out  their  clangor  on  the  town, 

As  if  to  summon  all  the  world  to  prayer, 
By  fighting  orthodoxy  "  done  up  brown;" 

A  prayer  for  strife  on  earth — red-handed  war — 
Ill-will  to  men — and  heaven's  indignant  frown 

On  the  "South  Church"— where  Christ  alone  was  preached, 

And  the  "  almighty  nigger"  went  unbleached  ! 

XXXVII. 

'Twas  a  strange  church,  and  stranger  still  the  theme 
On  which  it  dwelt.    The  throes  of  agony 

Felt  by  the  dying  Christ  in  that  extreme 
Of  death  he  suffered,  groaning  on  the  tree, 

To  vindicate  the  Father's  name  supreme, 
And  yet  uplift  a  world  from  its  apostacy ; 

Dying  himself  that  others  might  not  die — 

The  great  Lamb-offering  for  humanity  : 


18 

XXXVIII. 

And  though  this  mighty  theme  once  floated  down 
The  sky  upon  the  harps  of  angels,  and 

Thrilled  a  Universe  with  rapture  all  its  own, 
(For  seraphs  shared  not  in  a  heaven  regained, 

But  only  wondered  and  adored  when  shown 
The  mystery  of  the  cross,)  yet  few  retained 

Their  ancient  faith,  and  zeal,  and  Christian  rigor, 

But  worshipped  only  the  "  almighty  nigger." 


And  setting  up  this  "  god  in  ebony" 

Upon  the  pedestal  of  mortal  hate, 
They  sought,  like  Mahomet  of  Araby, 

With  fire  and  sword  their  faith  to  propagate; 
Swearing  the  Pentateuch  to  be  a  lie, 

And  every  prophet  but  a  vile  ingrate, 
Who  forged  the  word  of  God,  in  lying  staves, 
To  make  "the  heathen  round  about"  their  slaves! 

XL. 

And  holding  Paul  up  as  a  vile  Apostle, 
To  send  Onesimus,  a  slave,  from  Rome 

Back  to  his  Phrygian  master,  one  most  hostile 
To  freedmen's  rights,  when  clashing  with  his  own 

And  anxious  above  all  to  be  the  "boss"  still 
Of  this  same  fugitive,  for  reasons  shown  ; 

For  Paul  informs  Philemon  in  his  letter, 

That  he's  improved  his  slave  much  for  the  better  ; 


19 

XLL 

That  is,  lias  sent  him  back  "  in  double  bonds" — 
Those  of  the  flesh  as  well  as  in  the  Lord, 

Without  the  aid  of  gyves  or  Spanish  hounds, 
But  by  the  potency  of  his  preached  word  ; 

And  seems  to  think  the  servant  that  absconds, 
Lacks  wholesome  knowledge,  or  has  simply  heard 

Perverse  disputings  by  some  railing  pastor, 

Who  follows  not  the  precepts  of  his  Master. 

XLII. 

And  parsons  of  this  stripe  had  come  to  be 
The  universal  wranglers  of  the  town ; 

The  orators  and  flamens  of  the  day, 

Who  trode  the  earth  with  magisterial  frown 

As  if  it  ought  to  quake  as  they  passed  by 

With  their  "  white  chokers,"  or  look  humbly  down 

And  crave  their  lordly  feet  to  trample  on't, 

As  Xerxes  did,  who  flogged  the  Hellespont, 

XLIII. 

And  trundled  old  Mount  Athos  in  the  sea, 
Or  threatened  to,  if  it  would  not  come  down 

And  let  his  royal  mightiness  pass  by ; 

So  consequential  had  these  parsons  grown, 

So  vain  and  supercilious  in  their  way  : 
Deeming  the  world  no  doubt  a  well-fleshed  bone 

For  them  to  gnaw  at,  or  a  stalking  ass 

Intent  to  bray  them  honors  as  they  pass ! 


XLIV. 

A  vain  conceit  of  theirs,  and  one  that  shows 
Their  mental  vision  sadly  turned  awry  : 

The  world  is  assinine  enough,  God  knows, 
To  wear  alone  the  ass's  livery  ; 

But  they  dispute  its  honors  and  disclose 
By  far  the  greater  assininity ; 

Pelting  the  world  with  sermons,  just  to  show 

How  one  ass  spites  another  here  below ! 

XLV. 

I  beg  the  world  its  pardon.     Nothing  here 
Is  meant  for  its  disparagement  or  praise : 

I  only  aim  a  shaft  at  those  who  wear 
The  ass's  ears,  and  yet  refuse  his  bays ; 

Who  think  the  universal  world  should  stare, 
And  gape  amazement  at  their  crude  displays 

Of  ethics,  morals,  politics,  and  so  forth, 

Whenever  they  their  learning  choose  to  show  forth  ! 

XLVI. 

One  of  these  high  ecclesiastic  lords 

Who  held  the  world  his  debtor,  though  but  few 
Drew  heavier  on  its  largess  (which  accords 

Its  pound  of  flesh  to  every  hungry  Jew, 
And  yet  denies  its  blood,  as  that  affords 

Scant  guerdon  to  the  Christian)  proudlier  grew 
In  his  demeanor  as*  he  grew  in  years, 
Although  he  preached  to  emptier  walls  than  ears  ! 


21 

XLVII. 

He  was  the  mighty  "kraken"  of  the  church,    1S 
Or  rather  "  congregation"  that  no  church  is, 

And  dealt  with  certain  parsons  pretty  much 
As  krakens  do  with  ships  within  their  clutches; 

He  either  dragged  them  down  with  his  first  touch, 
Or  stayed  them  up  to  get  a  better  purchase  : 

That  is,  to  get  them  fully  in  his  tentacles, 

Or  "  kraken"  limbo,  id  est,  church  conventicles ! 

XLVIH. 

He  grappled  with  the  "  South  Church"  as  the  kraken 
Did  with  the  Dutch  ship  in  the  northern  sea,  1 4 

Which  seemed  at  first  effectually  to  rake  in 
Hulk,  mast  and  spars,  with  his  tentaculae  ; 

But  the  Dutch  sailors,  fancying  it  a  "  take  in," 
Seized  hatchet,  axe,  and  sabre  on  the  sly, 

And  ere  the  huge  Briareus  felt  a  scratch,  his 

Hundred  arms  lay  quivering  on  the  hatches ! 

xux. 

This  sent  the  kraken  croaking  down  the  sea, 
As  if  he'd  caught  an  unexpected  Tartar 

In  the  Dutch  tars  that  lopped  his  branchiae, 
And  sent  him  howling  like  a  wreck  of  matter 

Hurled  by  Titanic  forces  through  the  sky ; 
The  Lilliputian  fish,  affrighted,  scatter 

In  all  directions,  while  the  intrepid  whale 

Fans  the  old  kraken  with  his  playful  tail. 
2 


His  story  learned,  the  universal  wish  is 

Of  all  convened,  to  have  a  high  court-martial, 

Or  ichthyologic  council  of  big  fishes, 
To  try  the  craft  that  dared  to  seek  those  glacial 

And  icy  regions,  where  no  other  dish  is 

Found  to  which  the  kraken's  half  so  partial, 

As  a  staunch  ship  that  braves  both  wind  and  weather, 

With  a  big  crew,  to  swallow  altogether ! 

LI. 

The  council  was  convened  without  delay  : 
A  motley  group  it  proved  and  slightly  scaly ; 

'  Ring-streaked  and  speckled"  were  they  in  their  way, 
As  much  so  as  the  tenants  of  "  Old  Bailey." 

The  shark  was  present  and  inclined  to  prey, 
A  pious  trick  he  had  and  practiced  daily ; 

For  sharks,  like  certain  priests,  grow  hugely  pious, 

When  with  some  sinister  design  they  eye  us. 

LII. 

The  ship  was  libelled  by  -the  finny  tribes 
As  a  "  most  dangerous  and  piratic  sail," 

Jack  Porpoise  acting  as  the  "  chief  of  scribes"  1 5 
(And  thereby  hangs  a  parenthetic  tale); 

Spouting  his  little  stream  of  diatribes, 
And  trying  very  hard  to  play  the  whale ; 

For  this  pretentious  fish  will  blow  and  spout, 

Both  in  his  proper  element  and  out ! 


28 

LIII. 

He  had  withal  a  clever  knack  at  skimming 
The  surface  of  a  deep  and  ruffled  sea, 

And  rode  the  topmost  wave,  as  if  'twere  hymning 
Some  grand  old  stave  for  him  to  wallow  by ; 

His  head  meanwhile  with  surface  water  brimming, 
Until  it  almost  burst  in  giddy  spray  ; 

If  spray  it  might  be  called,  that  seemed  to  swash, 

Through  his  spent  gills,  in  metaphoric  "  bosh  !" 

LIV. 

He  thought  the  wily  craft  should  be  assailed 
With  all  the  deadly  weaponry  they  had, 

And  all  on  board  effectually  impaled 
For  the  temerity  that  they'd  displayed. 

The  sword-fish,  he  contended,  never  failed 
To  pierce  the  staunchest  bottom  ever  made ; 

And  as  for  the  torpedo,  should  he  shock  her, 

He'd  send  them  all  to  Davy  Jones'  locker ! 

LV. 

And  then,  the  whale  his  giant  flukes  might  use 
To  more  advantage,  if  he'd  leave  off  spouting, 

And  not  attempt  to  ventilate  his  flues 

In  every  sea  he  chanced  to  stick  his  snout  in  ; 

No  "  loyal"  fish  should  hesitate  to  use 
The  weapons  that  he  found  himself  most  stout  in 

And,  hence,  the  whale  should  use  alone  his  flukes  in 

These  atrabilious  seas  the  sailor  pukes  in  ! 


24 

LVI. 

Here  all  the  little  fishes  wagged  their  tails 

In  high  approval  of  his  proposition, 
And  voted  Jack  to  be  the  "  prince  of  whales," 

"Who  spouted,  as  it  were,  by  intuition  ; 
And  seldom  floundered,  save  in  certain  gales 

That  set  the  sea  in  state  of  ebullition  ; 
And  then,  he  knew  not  on  which  end  his  tail  was, 
Or  whether  he  a  whale  in  sea  or  pail  was  ! 

LVII. 

The  whale,  inclined  to  be  somewhat  facetious, 
Admitted  that  Jack  Porpoise  had  some  qualities 

That  were  not  altogether  adventitious : 

For  instance,  he  could  deal  in  certain  jollities, 

And  still  be  grave  and  reverend,  though  officious ; 
Or  furnish  an  example  of  what  folly  'tis, 

In  certain  fishes,  to  indulge  in  "  splurging," 

That  cannot  hold  a  candle  to  a  sturgeon  ! 

LVIII. 

He  was  himself  indignant  that  the  kraken 
Had  got  so  vile  and  dastardly  a  clip, 

But  lopping  off  his  limbs  had  "  saved  his  bacon" 
As  all  might  see  who  duly  scanned  the  ship ; 

For  with  a  crew  on  board  as  god-forsaken 
As  any  that  e'er  ventured  on  such  trip, 

She  had  (in  contact  with  the  fires  that  heat  her) 

A  ton  or  two  of  villainous  saltpeter ! 


25 

LIX. 

And  had  the  kraken  pocketed  the  vessel 
In  his  rapacious  and  tremendous  wallet, 

He  certainly  had  caught  (as  one  may  guess)  hell, 
Or  such  a  seething  sea  as  never  squall  hit. 

A  sorry  feast  it  is  to  simply  press  hell 
Upon  one's  appetite  until  you  pall  it ; 

So  thought  the  whale  that  ventured  once  to  sup 

Upon  the  fiery  prophet  he  spewed  up. 

LX 

For  he'd  no  sooner  lodged  him  'neath  his  gills, 
Than  he  began  to  have  as  deadly  qualm 

As  if  he'd  swallowed  fifty  thousand  pills 
Of  ipecacuanha,  in  one  man  ; 

And  had  besides,  a  ton  or  two  of  quills, 
From  bristling  porcupine,  into  him  run  : 

This  was  too  much  for  any  whale  to  stand, 

And  so  he  threw  up  Jonah  on  dry  land  ! 

LXI. 

Now,  if  the  whale  had  suffered  so  much  torture 
From  having  lined  his  belly  with  one  man, 

What  pangs  had  rent  the  kraken  when  he  caught  your 
Fifty  Dutch  tars  that  roved  o'er  the  main  ? 

And  with  them  a  torpedo  that  had  brought  your 
Flesh  and  blood  to  rush  in  one  wild  vein  ; 

Or,  rather,  blown  the  kraken  into  jelly, 

And  turned  up  every  fish  upon  his  belly ! 


26 
LXII. 

This  was  a  perfect  ichthyologic  clincher, 

(I  mean  the  argument  the  whale  had  made,) 

And  caused  Jack  Porpoise  to  look  "  every  inch  a" 
Minnow,  sadly  thrown  into  the  shade  ; 

Although  he'd  once  obtained,  upon  a  pinch,  a 
Reputation  for  a  fast  young  blade, 

And  tried  his  hand  at  distancing  the  Dolphin, 

Whose  straight  two-forty  gait  showed  he  was  all  fin !  1 6 

LXIII 

And  so  the  "  council"  ended  in  thin  spray, 
Or  what  is  metaphorically  called  "  smoke," 

Leaving  the  kraken  in  his  agony, 

To  fret  and  chafe  and  rage  and  fume  and  choke ; 

Like  some  old  autocrat  who's  had  his  day, 

And  finds  the  chains  that  held  his  subjects  broke : 

At  first  he  storms  terrifically  and  swears, 

And  then  a  monastery  seeks,  and  says  his  prayers. 

LXIV. 

Meanwhile  the  ship,  like  a  high  prancing  steed, 
That  knows  his  rider  yet  unheeds  his  weight, 

Keeps  on  her  course  with  steadier,  loftier  tread, 
And  tramples  down  the  waves  beneath  her  feet : 

No  kraken's  council  does  she  deign  to  heed, 
However  fierce  its  wrath  or  spent,  its  hate ; 

But  breasts  her  way  the  liquid  mountains  through, 

As  if  her  strength  from  obstacles  she  drew. 


27 

LXV. 

The  kraken's  tentacles,  when  first  lopped  off, 
Occasioned  some  slight  stir  among  the  crew ; 

They  writhed  and  squirmed  like  serpents  when  they  slough, 
Or  seek  to  do  so,  their  old  hides  for  new : 

In  their  contortions  playing  blind-man's-buff 
Like  anacondas  that  are  cut  in  two, 

And  "  go  it  blind"  as  to  each  several  half, 

Not  knowing  whether  head  or  tail  is  off! 

LXVI 

But  their  fandango  ended,  they  were  thrown 

Into  the  jaws  of  the  remorseless  sea, 
Which  soon  devoured  them  up,  and  left  alone 

The  good  ship  and  her  crew,  to  make  their  way 
With  the  same  favoring  breezes  that  had  blown, 

Before  the  kraken  sought  them  as  his  prey ; 
Or  rather,  sought  clandestinely  to  drag  'em 
Down  to  his  favorite  den,  where  he  might  bag  'em ! 

LXVII. 

Quintilian  furnishes  the  world  this  story, 
And  vouches  for  its  truth,  which  I'll  not  do  : 

That  there  was  once  a  huge  conservatory 
Just  out  of  Rome,  where  rare  exotics  grew, 

Fresh  from  the  East,  in  all  their  floral  glory, 
From  distant  Gades  brought,  or  Timbuctoo ; 

Where  birds  of  rarest  plumage  poured  their  throats 

Upon  the  air  in  rapture-thrilling  notes. 


28 

LXVIII. 

'Twas  what  in  Rome  they  called  a  kortus  floreus, 
And  was  the  property  of  one  who'd  been 

A  wild  roue  in  youth,  or  most  notorious 
For  certain  vices  Eome  then  reveled  in ; 

When  from  her  seven  hills  she  frowned  victorious 
O'er  Scotia,  Gaul,  Sarmatia,  and  the  Ind. ; 

Conquering  a  world  for  glory  and  for  pelf, 

But  ending  in  vile  conquest  of  herself. 

LXIX. 

The  owner  of  this  kortus  floreus  rare 

Supplied  his  grounds  with  artificial  showers, 

That  from  a  thousand  ^'eta  d'eau  leapt  in  air, 

And  fell  in  glittering  spray-drift  'mong  the  flowers ; 

Scattering  their  perfume  prodigally  there 
'Mid  shady  nooks  and  quiet  shelvy  bowers, 

Where  flowed  Falernian  for  the  fairest  women, 

With  most  voluptuous  baths  for  them  to  swim  in. 

LXX. 

Music  he  had,  and  mirth,  and  jest,  and  laughter, 

To  stir  his  laggard  senses  into  play, 
And  keep  his  vices,  which  came  dangling  after, 

Where  they  might  seem  like  virtues  kept  at  bay ; 
A  trick  by  which  a  certain  Boston  pastor 

Relieved  his  vices  when  he  went  to  pray, 
Making  the  worldlings  of  a  hotel  stare 
At  wine  and  women,  as  post-prandial  fare ! 


29 

LXXI. 

This  rich  old  Roman  had,  it  seems,  a  neighbor, — 
A  youth  far-famed  for  culture  of  his  bees — 

Swarms  from  Hymettus,  or  from  old  Mount  Tabor, 
Then  lately  garrisoned  beyond  the  seas ; 

Who  ne'er  had  learned  to  hew  and  hack  with  sabre, 
But  lived  a  life  of  philosophic  ease, — 

His  honey  finding  him  a  host  of  patrons, 

Especially  among  the  Roman  matrons. 

LXXII. 

This  galled  the  old  man's  liver — made  him  bilious, 
Or  "  atrabilious,"  as  the  phrase  then  went  ; 

And  peevish  grown,  and  vain,  and  supercilious, 
He  to  the  youth  this  haughty  message  sent : 

(Quoting  a  line  or  two  from  old  Lucilius 

To  give  it  point,  or  give  his  spleen  a  vent :) 
'  I  here  inform  Sir  Upstart  that  his  bees. 

Must  not  filch  honey  from  my  premises." 

LXXIII. 

The  youth,  amused,  returns  this  prompt  reply : 

"  If  you'll  but  keep  your  odors  to  yourself, 
And  not  entice  my  bees  abroad  to  fly, 

I'll  henceforth  guard  against  their  petty  pelf, 
And  leave  Sir  Dotard  in  his  dignity— 

A  cracked  old  goblet  laid  upon  the  shelf : 
One  that  might  brim  again  with  grape,  no  doubt, 
If  it  were  not  effectually  played  out." 


30 

LXXIV. 

Now,  as  the  story  goes,  the  old  man  went 
To  an  apothecary,  beneath  the  Quernian, 

In  search  of  certain  herbs  his  spleen  to  vent, 
Or  hellebore  that  grew  beyond  the  Lernian  :  — 

A  lake  whose  fell  malaria  oft  spent 

Itself  in  fevers,  that  were  called  quaternian ; 

Or  every  fourth  day  made  one  shake  and  shiver, 

As  if  he  had  an  iceberg  in  his  liver. 

LXXV. 

And  there  he  got  some  powdered  hellebore, 
With  which  to  sprinkle  every  flower's  petal, 

That  when  the  busy  swarms  approached  once  more, 
Their  fate  in  this  way  he  might  quickly  settle ; 

Or  better  still,  contaminate  their  store 

Of  nectared  sweets,  and  thereby  snugly  get  all 

The  young  man's  patrons  into  the  same  boat, 

With  grim  old  Charon,  king  of  Styx,  to  row  't. 

LXXVI. 

And  here  the  old  man  chuckled  in  high  glee, 

And  hastened  homeward  with  his  purchased  treasure  > 

Taking  the  most  direct,  or  Appian  way, 

Where  many  a  proud  patrician  strolled  at  leisure, 

And  frowned  upon  the  plebs  as  they  passed  by  : 
Deeming  their  mirth  a  sort  of  savage  pleasure 

That  baser  natures  take,  in  being  born 

To  an  inheritance  of  hate  and  scorn ! 


31 


LXXYII. 

And  reaching  now  his  gardens,  he  essays 
The  task  before  him,  which  is  quickly  done ; 

Each  sheltered  nook  he  seeks  where  fountain  plays, 
And  spray-lash'd  bower,  where  laughing  waters  run, 

Babbling  their  mirth  to  the  sweet  roundelays 
Of  birds  that  flash  their  plumage  in  the  sun, 

And  pierce  the  air  with  music — strewing  wide 

His  purchased  hellebore  on  every  side. 

LXXVIII. 

But  as  the  thief,  who,  stealing  his  own  purse 
And  hiding  it  in  sleep,  repents  his  gains, 

So  wakes  the  old  man  from  his  dreams  to  curse 
The  hour  he  had  his  labor  for  his  pains ; 

For  everywhere  his  flowers  are  blasted  worse 
Than  if  some  mildew  had  sucked  dry  their  veins, 

Or  some  malignant  frost-sprite  of  the  air 

Had  breathed  its  blighting  curse  upon  them  there. 

LXXIX. 

This  story  has  its  moral.    I  have  seen 
A  hundred  just  such  old  men  in  my  day, 

Grown  atrabilious  from  excess  of  spleen 
Engendered  by  their  pancreas  in  this  way ; 

Who  put  on  airs,  and  wore  a  lofty  mien — 

Arching  their  brows,  as  if  they  thought  to  say 

To  all  who  dared  into  their  presence  come, 

'I  am  sir  Oracle,  and  strike  you  dUmb !" 


32 


But  -who,  with  neither  sense  nor  wit  to  see 
How  very  like  a  "  Cuman  ass"  they  make 

Themselves  to  others,  vainly  seek  to  bray 
Their  wisdom  in  a  mortar  for  the  sake 

Of  some  poor  fool  that  stumbles  in  their  way, 
In  search  of  jewels  to  adorn  his  neck  : 

As  if  old  Tully's  paradox  were  true, 

That  wisdom's  thread  is  folly's  golden  clue. 

LXXXI. 

Nor  is  its  moral  difficult  to  see : 

Old  ^Esop  would  have  guessed  it  at  a  glance, 
And  given  us  the  fable  of  a  tree 

That  lopped  its  highest  branches,  to  advance 
Its  upward  growth  or  cut  its  limbs  away, 

Its  strength  and  beauty  thereby  to  enhance ; 
Or — as  if  into  deeper  folly  sunk — 
To  save  its  life,  had  girdled  its  own  trunk ! 

LXXXII. 

This  story  also  has  its  counterpart, 
Or  parallel  in  folly,  in  those  churches 

That  seek  for  hellebore  in  every  mart 

Where  they  can  make  clandestinely  a  purchase, 

And  scatter  it  abroad  with  just  such  art 
As  Satan  uses  when  he  seeks  to  clutch  his 

Victim  unawares,  or  lies  in  wait 

And  flings  his  twine  Vith  golden  flies  for  bait ! 


LXXXIII. 

As  he  entraps  his  victims,  so  do  they, 
And  with  substantially  the  same  design  ; 

Which  is,  to  kill  all  vital  piety 

From  out  the  church  they  seek  to  undermine : 

Thinking  that  they  may  thereby  lead  astray 
Its  shallow-pated  members,  grown  supine 

By  reason  of  their  church's  moral  dearth, — 

The  best-known  substitute  for  hell  on  earth. 

LXXXIV. 

But  as  ambition  oft  o'erleaps  its  mark 

And  "  falls  on  t'other  side,"  so  now  do  they, — 

The  devil  and  the  churches  that  embark 
Upon  a  common  emprise  in  this  way ; 

They  rob  themselves,  not  others,  of  the  spark 
Vouchsafed  by  heaven  to  kindle  mortal  clay, 

And  like  Prometheus,  chained  on  dreary  isle,  1 7 

Suffer  the  pangs  of  an  immortal  bile  ! 

LXXXV. 

But  episode  aside.     We  left  the  Peri 

All  radiantly  alighted  from  on  high, 
Eager  to  solve  the  late  perplexing  query, 

Or  questionem  vexat.  of  the  sky  ; 
And  though  her  flight  was  long  and  somewhat  dreary, 

And  led  through  many  a  starless  canopy ; 
Yet,  on  the  whole,  she  fancied  it  bad  been 
One  worth  her  while  immortal  wings  to  preen. 


34 

LXXXVI. 

It  was  a  Sabbath  evening,  as  we  said, 

And  in  a  city  boasting  of  its  spires 
And  "  toppling"  steeples  pointing  overhead, 

Like  index  fingers  to  celestial  choirs  ; 
And  universities  of  stately  grade, 

As  full  of  classic  honors  as  of  years ; 
Though,  latterly,  dispensing  but  a  crumb 
Of  wisdom,  to  a  ton  of  pabulum. 

LXXXVH. 

For  "  Young  America"  had  come  to  be 
His  own  exclusive  guide,  and  lord,  and  master, 

And  flung  the  old  "  curriculum"  away 
For  one  that  generated  speed  much  faster ; 

Demanding  that  professors,  old  and  gray, 
Should  step  aside  for  young  grammaticaster, 

Who  proudly  spurned  each  classic  stepping-stone, 

And  leapt  at  once  o'er  the  tutorial  throne  ! 

LXXXVIIL 

It  was  a  classic  town,  with  broad  elm  trees 

As  classic  as  their  classic  shade  could  make  'em, 

Where  classic  men  and  women  lolled  at  ease 
'Mid  classic  honors,  thick  as  one  could  shake  'em ; 

With  here  and  there  its  classic  coteries, 

With  classic  badges,  that  none  might  mistake  'em, 

And,  last  not  least,  its  classic  Institute, 

Where  young  ideas  old  gimcracks  learn  to  shoot ! 


35 

LXXXIX. 

Yet  with  its  classic  honors  thickly  strewn 

As  autumn  leaves  in  quiet  Valambrosw, 
The  only  classic  genius  it  had  known  l  s 

To  tread  its  classic  halls,  scarce  ever  rose  a 
Peg  above  a  mendicant  in  town  ; 

And  would  have  starved  outright,  had  he  not  chose  a 
Home  in  the  far  back-woods,  where  he  died  alone, 
Unwept,  unhonored,  and  without  a  stone ! 

XC. 

Such  was  the  town  in  which  the  Peri  stood 
Upon  the  Sabbath  evening  we  have  named, 

And  wondered  at  its  dismal  solitude, 

Though  streets  were  thronged  and  many  a  window  flamed 

With  crimson  light  that  spoke  of  brothers'  blood ; 
While  priests  their  fierce  anathemas  proclaimed 

Against  a  sister  church,  for  the  strange  reason, 

That  loyalty  to  Christ  is  high  State  treason  ! 

XCI. 

For  there  had  been  a  council  called  "  ex  parte," 

Held  in  a  chapel  in  a  street  hard  by,  1 9 
Whose  basement  was  devoted  to  ecarte 

And  stiffest  imbibitions  of  "  old  rye ;" 
And  where  the  devil  laughed  no  doubt  as  hearty 

At  grim  ecclesiastics  in  his  eye, 
As  at  the  games  of  "  poker"  played  below, 
Or  "  dice,"  that  won  him  souls  at  every  throw. 


36 

XCII. 

Three  days  the  council  sat — the  devil  three, 
Each  for  "deliberation  high,"  of  course; 

He  in  the  basement,  they  in  gallery, 
Where  low-born  comedy  once  bawled  till  hoarse, 

With  nymphs  dupave  to  pirouette  en  gre  ; 
And  politicians  gathered  in  full  force 

To  ride  themselves  au  negre  into  power, 

Or  mount  the  "  nigger"  as  their  grand  centaur. 

XCIH. 

They  "  opened"  with  a  prayer,  as  we  are  told, 
At  which  the  devil  grinned  a  ghastly  smile, 

And  cocked  his  tail  so  high  that  it  grew  cold 
And  through  his  marrow  shot  an  icy  thrill, 

Of  such  intensity  that  he  made  bold 
To  take  a  "  cock-tail"  to  take  off  the  chill : 

Meanwhile  he  listened  with  his  ears  erect, 

As  if  a  second  prayer  he  did  expect. 

XCIV. 

But  they  prayed  only  once — and  such  a  prayer ! 

It  capped  the  climax  of  the  Pharisee, 
In  its  self-righteous  pomp,  and  strain,  and  air; 

And  in  its  "How  much  holier  are  we" 
Disclosed  at  once  "  How  very  vile  you  are," 

And  everything  that  comes  within  your  way ; 
Except  their  own  phylacteries,  and  these 
Were  broad  enough  for  fifty  Pharisees. 


37 

xcv. 

They  had  put  forth  against  a  certain  church 

A  quan  bull  of  excommunication, 
Or  rather  held,  "  That,  whereas,  inasmuch 

As  gospel  preaching  was  its  sole  vocation, 
And  "  loyal"  politics  it  would  not  touch, 

It  sadly  needed  a  denunciation  !" 
And  so  they  all  united  in  one  bull, 
To  simply  damn  the  church  they  couldn't  rule ! 

XCVL 

And  this  but  added  fuel  to  the  flame 

Of  that  fierce  fire  which  engulphed  the  town, 

Upon  the  evening  when  the  Peri  came 
Flashing  upon  her  radiant  pinions  down, 

Making  herself  the  universal  theme 
Of  wonder  to  astronomers,  till  one, 

More  lucky  than  the  rest,  resolved  the  doubt, 

By  hinting  at  a  universe  snuffed  out ! 

XCVII. 

The  North  Church  and  the  Center  were  ablaze, 
Not  with  "blue  lights,"  as  formerly,  but  red ; 

And  eager  throngs  were  gathered  there  to  praise 
The  God  of  Battles  and  invoke  his  aid, 

That  one  defiant  city  he  might  raze, 
Till  not  a  stone  upon  another  laid ; 

To  wit,  that  "  moral  Sodom"  of  the  plain, 

On  which  "  swamp-angels"  poured  their  iron  rain. 
3 


462464 


38 

XCVIII. 

Two  scenes  the  Peri  witnessed — this  and  that ; 

And  down  her  seraph  cheek  there  stole  a  tear 
Of  such  weird  crystal  that  to  gaze  thereat, 

Was  more  than  any  mortal  eye  could  bear ; 
It  was  so  heavenly  and  compassionate, 

And  full  of  pity  for  the  woes  we  share ; 
And  as  she,  sighing,  wiped  the  tear  away, 
The  parson  of  the  Center  rose  to  pray. 

XCIX. 

But  she  heard  not  the  invocation,  as 

In  harsh  and  grating  accents  it  went  forth, 

Keyed  to  the  note  of  earth's  incessant  jars ; 
But  far  away  from  the  war-breathing  North, 

In  that  doomed  city— Sodom  that  it  was, — 
On  which  was  focused  all  the  nation's  wrath, 

Another  scene  engaged  the  seraph's  eye, 

And  in  an  instant  she  stood  trembling  by. 


'Twas  in  a  Christian  church,  and  strange  to  say, 
Beneath  the  same  broad  heaven  that  shields  us  here, 

Whose  spire  went  upward,  in  the  same  mute  way, 
To  guide  earth's  weary,  way-worn  traveler; 

And  men  presumed  to  breathe,  on  bended  knee, 
The  same  cherubic  element — God's  air ; 

And  that  in  praise  that  dared  with  ours  to  vie, 

Upborne  to  Him  who  hears  the  raven's  cry  ! 


39 


ci. 

And  at  the  altar  stood  a  fair-haired  maid, 
All  garmen^kd  in  robes  of  stainless  white  ; 

Whose  eyes  were  dark  and  lustrous,  and  conveyed 
A  strange  wild  thrill  of  rapture  and  delight 

To  the  strong  heart  that  held  her,  thus  arrayed, 
As  his  alone  by  heaven's  divinest  right ; 

While  upward  sped  a  white-wing'd  dove  to  bear 

The  incense  that  she  breathed  to  heaven  in  prayer. 

OIL 

The  Peri  saw  and  wept,  as  well  she  might ; 

For  her  eye  pierced  the  gloom  as  does  the  spark 
Struck  from  a  diamond  by  a  shaft  of  light ; 

And  darted  wildly  out  into  the  dark, 
As  if  it  thought  to  catch  some  horrid  sight, 

Like  files  of  sheeted  dead  men,  stiff  and  stark ; 
Or  ward  the  stroke  of  some  impending  doom, 
About  to  flash  from  out  the  spectral  gloom. 

CIIL 

For  now  the  fierce  "  swamp-angel"  down  the  bay, 
So  called  in  fiendish  merriment  or  joke, 

Winds  up  the  tragic  honors  of  the  day, 
By  giving  "  Old  Secesh"  another  "  poke" — 

Sending  a  northern  "  minister"  to  pay 
A  "  Sabbath  greeting"  to  a  southern  flock : 

The  joke's  a  good  one— equal  to  Abe's  best, 

And  so  the  swamp-fiend  flings  bis  iron  jest ! 


40 
crv. 

Piercing  the  air  like  some  demoniac  cry, 
Wrung  from  a  soul  by  fiery  serpents  kissed, 

The  maddened  missile  leapt  into  the  sky, 

And  on  its  hellish  errand  shrieked  and  hissed ; 

The  sentries  call,  "Another  'devil's  eye,' 

From  the  '  swamp-angel,'  gleaming  through  the  mist ! 

But  friendly  admonition  is  in  vain, 

The  death-wing  rustles  on  the  air  again  ! 

CV. 

And,  lo  !  its  victim  is  the  fair-haired  bride, 
Struck  at  the  altar  ere  her  vows  were  made  : 

A  deed  at  which  the  "  paindest  fiend"  might  hide 
In  hell's  dun  smoke  his  scarred  and  blackened  head, 

And  summon  troops  of  blasphemies  beside, 
To  damn  him  to  the  deepest  depths  of  shade  ! 

And  yet  a  fierce  fanaticism  cries, 
"Another  batch  of  just  such  victories  !" 

CVI. 

Oh  heaven  !  oh  hell !  enough  of  war  that's  "  civil," 
Invoke  what  height  or  depth  you  may,  or  call 

On  what  divinity  you  will  or  devil, — 

'Tis  all  the  same.     Since  Adam  had  his  fall 

Earth  hath  not  seen  a  greater  curse  or  evil, 
And  may  not  see,  till  she  has  summoned  all 

The  hidden  fires  of  her  breast  within, 

To  cleanse  her  surface,  scarred  by  death  and  sin. 


41 

cvn. 

The  Peri  wept,  or  seemed  such  grief  to  show 
As  seraphs  do,  when  weeping  for  each  other : 

Her  tears  came  not  with  such  o'ermastering  flow 
As  madly  to  gush  out,  all  spent  together, 

But  slowly  chrystalized  as  diamonds  do ; 
As  if  a  joy  some  giant  grief  would  smother, 

And  found  it  hard  to  get  the  mastery  : — 

So  stands  a  tear-drop  in  the  Peri's  eye. 

CVIII. 

And  so  it  stood  upon  that  night  of  shame 

And  sin  and  desecration,  not  to  say 
Of  murder  in  the  sight  of  God  and  man  : 
"  Who  at  the  priestly  altar  dares  to  slay 
A  friend  or  foe,  perdition  seize  his  name," 

Ran  the  old  Syriac  curse,  Anathema, 
Or  Maranatha,  when  the  Lord  stood  by 
To  wield  the  threatened  vengeance  of  the  sky. 

CIX. 

The  Peri  has  returned  ;  and  stands  again 

Hard  by  the  graves  of  the  "Old  Regicides,"  20 

(Grim  rebels  in  their  day,  with  still  the  stain 
Of  unwashed  treason  on  the  turf  that  hides 

Their  branded  heads,)  who  dared  the  tyrant's  chain 
To  sever,  and  his  kingly  neck  besides ; 

And  with  still  higher  daring,  dared  proclaim 

That  infamy  like  theirs,  was  deathless  fame. 


42 
ex. 

The  North  Church  is  ablaze.    A  "loyal"  text, 
With  "  loyal"  exegesis  penned  throughout, 

Has  reached  its  "  forty-ninthly,"  or  betwixt 
That  and  its  hundreth  head,  and  still  holds  out 

As  bravely  as  the  spider's  web,  that's  next 
To  airy  nothing  spun,  and  wove  about 

In  glittering  meshes  for  some  fly  to  go  : 

The  thread  seems  endless  till  it  parts  in  two ! 

CXI. 

This  church's  history  is  quite  unique : 

We  conned  some  pages  of  it  years  ago, 
When  "Bleeding  Kansas"  first  began  to  "shriek" 

For  Northern  aid  to  put  the  "ruffians"  through; 
And  every  church  got  up  its  little  speck 

Of  "  border  war"  to  preach  about,  or  do 
As  this  church  did— send  rifles  out  to  "  lamm  'em" 
In  boxes  marked,  "From  Old  Fort  Kill  'em,  damn  'em  !"2 ' 

CXII. 

It  is  intensely  "  loyal"  now.     But  then, 

Ye  gods !  what  was  it  ?     Hell-black  with  its  treason — 
And  muttered  curses  'gainst  "  our  curse  and  bane" — 

That  "league  with  death,"  which  God  for  some  wise  reason 
(So  they  blasphemed)  allowed  us  to  ordain, 

That  He  might  stay  his  wrath  a  little  season ; 
Then  smash  in  fragments,  or  explode  the  whole, 
'Like  bombs  and  rockets  at  Sebastopol."  22 


43 

CXIII. 

But  I  must  leave  its  history  for  another 

And  lighter-footed  Canto.    It  is  one 
That  has  some  passages  'twere  well  to  smother, 

Or  touch  at  least  quite  gingerly  upon ; 
I  don't  refer  to  crim.  cons. ;  they  are  rather 

A  novelty  just  now  beneath  the  sun, 
Especially  in  churches  that  are  "  loyal," 
And,  hence,  high  moral  atmospheres  enjoy  all ! 

CXIV. 

The  logic  gravels  here,  I  grant ;  but  then 
What  does  not  follow  sometimes  goes  before, 

And  a  non  sequitur  has  often  been, 

Of  knock-down  argument,  the  gist  and  core ; 

I've  known  it,  when  adroitly  wielded,  pin 
The  most  consummate  casuist  to  the  floor, 

Or  send  him  sprawling  like  the  North  Church  steeple, 

When  it  was  sawed  down  by  the  Center  people  !  32 

CXV. 

'Tis  said  a  vain  and  stupid  ass  one  day, 
Wrapped  up  his  valiant  carcass  in  the  skin 

Of  an  old  lion  that  had  come  to  lay 
His  bones  among  his  ancestors,  within 

A  certain  valley  where  the  ass  did  stray  ; 

And  then  began  to  bray  with  might  and  main : 

The  simple  burghers  saw  through  his  disguise, 

And  pummeled  the  old  ass  till  he  grew  wise. 


44 

CXVI. 

The  fable's  ^Esop's,  but  the  moral's  mine, 
To  lash  the  traitor  with  when  he  shall  show 

Himself  abroad  in  his  disguise  so  thin ; 
And  bear  himself,  as  th^  same  church  would  do, 

As  if  all  "  loyalty"  pertained  to  him  ; 

Though  all  the  while  the  traitor's  ears  crop  through 

As  did  the  ass's,  when  he  1  bought  to  feign 

The  lion,  and  to  shake  his  mighty  mane  ! 

CXVII. 

The  world  has  reared  its  monuments  of  folly, 

Fools  have  rushed  in  where  angels  dared  not  tread, 

Madness  has  ruled  the  hour,  as  if  'twere  wholly 
Bent  on  some  swift  destruction  for  its  head ; 

Hare-brains  have  played  their  bedlam  pranks  as  fully 
As  Ajax  his,  or  the  mad  Orleans  maid, 

Or  that  wild  hermit,  squalid  grown  and  scurvy, 

Who  turned  the  world  once  all  but  topsy-turvy. 

CXVIII. 

But  all  the  freaks  of  human  madness  shown, 
Since  this  distempered  planet  had  its  birth, 

In  point  of  fact,  bear  no  comparison 
With  the  mad  freak  that  now  distracts  the  earth, 

And  sets  it  crazy  in  its  every  zone; 
Clamoring,  in  a  fit  of  drunken  mirth, 

For  a  wild  war-waltz  all  the  nation  through, 

To  end  in  one  grand — "  nigger"  fandango  ! 


45 
cxix. 

Each  crazy  zany  of  the  pulpit  vies 

With  his  politico-religious  neighbor, 
In  summing  up  the  "  sum  of  villainies  :" 

As  if  'twere  heaven's  high  mission  thus  to  labor, 
And  bend  his  utmost  zany  faculties  ; 

While  to  his  priestly  thigh  he  buckles  sabre, 
And  stalks  a -field — a  terror  to  his  foes, 
As  much  so  as  a  scare-crow  is  to  crows ! 

cxx. 

There  are,  'tis  said,  black  sublunary  devils, 

Infesting  every  belt  of  earth  and  air ; 
Who  nightly  hold  their  mad,  fantastic  revels 

In  bogs  and  fens,  where  ignesfatui  flare, 
To  lead  astray  each  luckless  wight  that  travels 

Across  the  moor,  unsheltered,  bleak,  and  bare ; 
Giving  themselves  as  many  different  shapes 
As  there  are  grimaces  to  grinning  apes. 

CXXI. 

And  that  it  is  their  chief  delight  to  make 

Some  hare-brained  fool  a  stalking  guide  and  teacher, 

To  cram  with  wisdom  each  obdurate  neck 

That  props  "the  human  face  divine"  or  feature  ; 

While  many  a  reckless  rake-hell  of  a  rake 

Turns,  at  their  bidding,  prophet,  priest  or  preacher, 

To  lamm  away  at  vices  all  his  own, 

Or  damn  the  world  for  reaping  as  he's  sown  ! 


46 

CXXII. 

I've  known  some  parsons  of  this  special  stripe, 
Who,  like  Democritus,  would  flout  at  folly, 

And  yet  grow  merry  as  a  grig,  and  wipe 
The  perspiration  at  each  idle  sally 

Of  their  dull  wits ;  that  juicier  than  a  snipe 

Seemed  to  themselves,  although  to  others  wholly 

Devoid  of  everything  that's  known  to  savor 

Of  "  Attic  salt,"  which  gives  to  wit  its  flavor. 

CXXHI. 

And  such  an  one  the  Peri  saw  that  night, 
When,  driven  from  the  Center  and  the  North 

By  their  repellant  atmospheres,  she  quite 
Forgot  her  heavenly  errand,  and  went  forth 

In  search  of  some  locality  that  might 
Afford  a  more  congenial  stay  on  earth  ; 

And  momentary-swift  as  thought  she  flew 

From  these  two  churches,  to  another  two. 

CXXIV. 

In  front  or  one,  or  standing  vis-a-vis, 

Was  Mammon's  temple,  built  on  what  we  owe, 

Or  rather  what  we've  sunk  beneath  the  sea ; 
And  in  the  rear,  a  devil  of  a  row 

Of  buildings,  by  the  devil  held  in  fee, 

If  one  may  judge  from  what  he  has  in  tow — 

Some  fifty  rum-holes,  all  within  his  clutch, 

With  which  he  stands  prepared  to  back  the  church  ! 


47 

cxxv. 

And  underneath,  as  motley  group  of  shops 
As  Grubstreet  clergyman  could  wish  to  see ; 

With  yankee  notions,  gimcracks,  ginger-pops, 
Sensation  novels,  brass  bijouterie, 

Tonsorial  artists — literary  slops, 

And  "  contrabands"  picked  up  in  Tennessee 

By  "  loyal"  brokers,  who  were  glad  to  bouse  'em, 

For  what  the  State  allowed — a  chance  to  chouse  'em ! 

CXXVI. 

An  architectural  wag  was  once  required 

To  give  the  order  of  this  church  a  name ; 

"All  order,"  he  replied,  "must  have  expired 

When  such  a  structure  into  being  came;" 

It  looks  as  if  to  Doric  it  aspired 
To  lay  some  sort  of  secondary  claim, 

While  all  the  orders  in  disorder  run, 

From  bastard  turret  to  foundation  stone. 

CXXVII. 

The  Eeri  entered  first  tbe  vestibule, 
Then  up  a  flight  of  steps  into  the  nave ; 

And,  listening  to  the  preacher,  thought  to  cull 
Some  flowers  of  rhetoric  worth  her  while  to  save ; 

But  what  was  her  astonishment,  when,  full 
Of  bile  and  billingsgate,  she  heard  him  rave, 

As  if  to  rival  all  the  sons-qf-Beecher's, 

In  his  politico-religious  speeches  ! 


48 


CXXVIII. 

I  know  this  is  unpopular  ;  I  know 

'Tis  damnable ;  I  know  'tis  shedding  ink 

In  vain ;  I  know  we  ought  to  feel  and  show 
Respect  for  clergymen,  who  are  the  pink 

And  rosemary  of  proprieties  below ; 
I  know  we  ought  in  charity  to  wink 

At  all  their  foibles,  whether  few  or  many, 

Save  when  in  politics  they  play  the  zany ; 

CXXIX. 

And  then  we  ought  to  flay  'em  to  the  bone,— 
Invoke  Euterpe's  lash  as  well  as  fire, 

And  lay  it  on  till  every  mother's  son 
Shall  to  his  pulpit  instantly  repair, 

And  leave  all  "dirty  work"  to  those  alone 
Who  have  no  sacerdotal  robes  to  wear ; 

Nor  be  the  first  to  leap  upon  the  rostrum, 

To  ventilate  each  vile  quack-ridden  nostrum  ! 

CXXX. 

Nor  prowl  about  the  politician's  den 

For  "  stolen  jests  from  Megara,"  or  crumbs 

Let  fall  from  editorial  tables  when 

The  devil  sucks  Ms  dirty,  inky  thumbs, 

And  chuckles  hugely  at  his  pious  vein 

Put  on  for  the  occasion,  when  there  comes 

A  clergyman  or  two  into  his  "  sanctum," 

To  help  his  villainous  satanic  crank  turn  ! 


49 

CXXXI. 

To  say  that  these  shall  have  the  "  Attic  wasps" 
Swarming  about  their  ears  with  stinging  tail, 

Is  but  historic  truth  the  poet  grasps, 
Whose  inspiration  is  prophetical : 

Lucilius  in  bis  day  applied  his  asps, 
When  milder  satire  was  of  no  avail ; 

And  follies  such  as  theirs,  shall  ever  be 

As  then— jeered  in  immortal  comedy, 

CXXXII. 

The  Peri  entered,  as  we  said,  the  nave, 
Or  body  of  the  church,  and  there  descried 

Self-righteousness  enough  to  damn  or  save 
A  hundred  churches,  and  their  knaves  beside : 

In  holding  forth,  its  parson  seemed  to  have 
The  air  and  mien  of  one  who  would  bestride 

The  world  like  a  Colossus,  could  he  find 

A  world  of  dandiprats  to  suit  his  mind  ! 

CXXXIII. 

He  did  not  absolutely  curse — that  is, 

Infringe  the  decalogue — but  came  so  near  it, 

Some  of  his  audience  thought  it  of  a  piece 
With  pulpit  swearing,  "  tall"  as  one  could  bear  it ; 

For  he  invoked  the  heavens  to  shower  this 

And  that  curse  on  his  foes,  till  they  should  swear  it 

Was  past  endurance,  even  in  a  block, 

To  stand  of  prayer  another  such  a  shock  ! 


50 

CXXXIV. 

And  then  he  prayed  against  a  certain  church, 

Notjfor  it,  as  the  Peri  thought  he  should ; 
And  in  his  prayer  administered  the  birch, 

Or  bastinado,  till  it  brought  the  blood 
To  tingle  in  his  own  veins  quite  as  much 

As  in  his  audience,  which  devoutly  bowed 
As  to  some  heavenly  edict  or  decree, 
Whilst  he  denounced  all  Punic  "  loyalty." 

CXXXV. 

And  left  all  Punic  faith  in  heaven,  to  go 
Uncensured,  unrebuked,  in  his  own  flock  ; 

Applauding  deeds  of  blood  long  sermons  through, 
As  if  a  bleeding  Christ  he  sought  to  mock, 

Or  "  honor"  with  a  crown  of  thorns  anew ; 
And  earth  itself  were  on  the  point  to  rock 

And  heave  its  broad  foundations  to  the  sky, 

As  in  its  mediaeval  agony  ! 

CXXXVL 

The  Peri  felt  oppressed  as  with  some  weight 
Too  heavy  for  a  seraph's  breast  to  bear, 

And  half  resolved  to  take  her  instant  flight 
And  re-ascend  the  crystal  heights  of  air; 

But  first  she  thought  to  look  out  on  the  night 
For  some  bright  pharo,  in  a  distant  star, 

To  guide  her  upward,  or  direct  her  way 

Back  to  the  empyrean,  by  its  ray. 


51 

CXXXVII. 

But  ere  she  bade  this  sin-scarred  world  adieu, 
The  thought  possessed  her,  strange  enough  to  say, 

To  visit  a  "  disloyal"  church  that  drew 
Upon  itself  untold  anathema ; 

Especially  from  clergymen,  who  threw 
Themselves  into  a  rage  whenever  they 

Heard  that  the  gospel,  undefiled,  was  preached 

Within  its  walls,  canonically  breached  ! 

CXXXYIII. 

And  as  she  neared  the  execrated  roof, 
A  strange  magnetic  force  began  to  play 

In  her  rapt  veins,  as  when  the  mystic  woof 
Leaps  from  the  shuttle  on  its  flashing  way 

To  interlace  two  hearts  that  stand  aloof, 
Yet  long  to  rush  together  and  allay 

A  common  anguish  in  a  common  flame ; 

So  leapt  a  transport  through  the  Peri's  frame. 

OXXXIX. 

For  there  she  found  the  only  guardian  seraph 
That,  kept  the  earth  amid  its  present  strife 

And  turmoil  of  fierce  factions,  the  din  whereof 
Jarred  on  celestial  ears  and  nerves,  as  if 

Some  universe  were  rent  in  fragments,  sheer  off 
Upon  the  confines  of  material  life  ; 

Where  matter,  in  its  elemental  strife  and  jar, 

Gives  birth  to  Titans,  waging  endless  war. 


52 

CXL. 

No  sooner  had  the  keen-eyed  seraph  caught 
The  flashing  of  her  wing,  than  forth  she  flew 

To  greet  the  Peri,  thinking  she  had  brought 
Some  errand  from  the  skies  for  her  to  do, 

Or  possibly  some  pledge  that  she  had  sought 
Of  sister  seraphs,  when  they  bade  adieu 

To  this  mad  earth,  to  re-ascend  the  skies, 

And  leave  to  Fate  her  tangled  destinies. 

CXLI. 

And  lo  !  the  Peri  stands,  with  folded  wings, 
Within  the  church,  by  seraph  thith'er  led, 

Who  in  her  hand  a  golden  censer  swings, 
As  if  to  scatter  perfume  o'er  each  head 

Low  bent  in  prayer  for  that  sweet  peace  that  brings 
Healing  to  men  and  nations,  when  they've  shed 

Their  blood  like  water  in  the  ensanguined  strife, 

And  only  cease  to  save  a  nation's  life  ! 

CXLII. 

Within  the  sacred  desk  the  preacher  stood, 
With  pale  and  thoughtful  face  to  heaven  upturned, 

Whose  blue  veins  kindled  to  a  purple  flood, 
As  on  his  lips  all  eloquently  burned 

A  prayer  for  peace,  upraised  to  Him  who  bowed 
The  heavens  and  came  down,  and  here  sojourned, — 

The  Prince  of  Peace,  by  Cedron's  waters  led, 

And  dark  Gethsemane,  to  be  betrayed  ! 


53 

CXLIII. 

And  in  his  earnest  supplication  brought 
His  bleeding  country  to  his  Saviour's  feet, 

As  if  the  shades  of  Olivet  he  sought 
To  stay  her  "  agony  and  bloody  sweat ;" 

Imploring  heaven  to  interpose  and  not 

Press  home  the  bitter  cup  till  drained  complete 

'  Oh,  let  it  pass,  if  but  thy  will  be  done," 

He  said,  "  ere  yet  its  dregs  like  Marah  run  !" 

CXLIV. 

Low  bent  the  seraphs  in  the  solemn  aisle 

As  upward  went  the  preacher's  earnest  prayer, 

That  heaven  might  graciously  vouchsafe  its  smile, 
Or  rather  cease  its  angry  frown  to  wear ; 

And  on  the  troubled  waters  pour  the  oil 
Of  reconciliation  near  and  far, — 

Spanning  once  more  the  weeping  skies  above 

With  rainbow  tokens  of  returning  love. 


CANTO  THE  SECOND. 


1  High  on  a  throne  of  royal  state,  which  far l 
Outshone  the  wealth  of  Ormus  and  of  Ind.," 

Satan  exalted  sat,  with  power  to  war 
Both  on  angelic  hosts  and  on  mankind ; 

And  on  his  breast  he  wore  the  thunder-scar 
Of  the  Almighty,  which  had  first  assigned 

Him  his  fixed  place,  in  outer  space  and  time, 

Where  Milton  revels  in  the  "  dread  sublime." 

II. 

His  grim  Satanic  majesty  looked  thin, 

And  pale,  and  haggard,  with  the  cares  of  state ; 

So  much  so,  that  his  old  sardonic  grin 
Of  satisfaction,  had  worn  off  of  late, 

And  left  him  somewhat '  down  about  the  chin," 
To  use  a  phrase  of  somewhat  doubtful  date ; 

Though  on  his  brow  he  bore  defiance  still, 

And  covert  guile,  foreboding  darkest  ill. 


56 

m. 

He'd  lately  held  a  council  of  his  peers, 

Off  on  the  very  confines  of  dun  air, 
In  order  to  discuss  some  state  affairs, 

Kelating  mostly  to  our  mundane  sphere ; 
Where  he  had  set  the  world  so  by  the  ears, 

That  everything  was  topsy-turvy  here, — 
Fools  madly  rushing  in,  where  angels  would 
Have  stood  aghast,  at  their  own  hardihood. 

IV. 

The  object  of  this  council  was,  I'm  told, 

Upon  the  part  of  his  Satanic  highness, 
To  wield  his  iron  sceptre  with  ten -fold 

The  guile  and  craft,  and  subtilty  and  slyness, 
That  he  resorted  to,  when  he  cajoled 

The  mother  of  mankind,  in  all  her  shyness 
And  maidenly  reserve,  by  that  fell  apple 
That  damned  the  race,  and  stuck  in  Adam's  thrapple  !2 

V. 

He  had  before  him  some  terrestrial  maps, 
And  hydrographic  charts,  which  he  inspected 

As  if  he  sought  to  guard  against  mishaps, 
In  some  grand  enterprise  by  him  directed ; 

And  summoned  Flamsteed's  ghost  by  sundry  raps, 
And  old  Mercator's,  where  they  least  expected  3 

To  find  themselves,  when  first  they  racked  their  brains 

About  reducing  spheroids  down  to  planes. 


57 

VI. 

And  asked  of  them  to  point  out  such  a  place 
As  Ethiopia,  if  there  really  was  one  : 

That  unknown  region,  or  grand  myth  in  space, 
Where  mighty  rivers  'gainst  all  natural  laws  run ; 

With  neither  mouth  nor  source  that  one  can  trace, 
Though  a  late  writer  thinks  it  safe,  because  one 

Runs  up  hill,  to  predicate  its  source, 

Whence  lost  Eurydice  was  snatched  by  force.  4 

VII. 

"  I  think,"  says  Satan,  pondering  the  matter, 

With  some  perplexity,  in  his  own  mind, 
"  This  region's  raised  a  devil  of  a  clatter, 

For  one  so  little  known  among  mankind  ; 
Or  little  cared  for,  save  as  food  to  scatter 
Mere  fire-brands  abroad,  by  such  as  find 
Their  occupation,  like  Othello's,  gone, 
When  discord  and  dissention  they  have  none. 

VIII. 

'  I  mean  the  long-eared  Puritanic  school, 

Who  make  Procrustean  beds  for  men  to  lie  on,  5 

And  mete  out  mercy  by  the  golden  rule 

That '  you  shall  think  as  they  do,  or  rely  on 

Hell  as  a  fixed  fact ;'  and  that  as  full 
As  they  can  cram  it,  with  an  evil  eye  on 

All  who  do  not  swallow  their  Satanic  dogmas, 

Or  wallow  in  their  intellectual  quagmires  ! 


58 


IX. 

;<I  know  not  what  they  think,"  continued  Satan, 
"  About  my  empire  and  its  maddened  revels, 
But,  judging  from  the  usual  themes  they  prate  on, 

Theirs  is  a  grand  Miltonic  school  of  devils 
Ready  to  do  their  bidding,  or  await  on 

Their  Puritanic  presence  just  serve  hell's 
Plan  and  purpose,  when  it  stands  in  need 
Of  a  politico-religious  creed ! 

X. 

'  And  know  you  all,"  says  Satan  to  his  peers, 

"  That  such  a  creed  is  hell's  most  potent  lever 
To  stir  an  earthquake  from  its  sleep  of  years  ; 

I  mean  a  moral  one,  that  comes  whenever 
The  atmosphere  is  charged  with  taunts  and  jeers 
To  that  mad  pitch  of  frenzy  that  would  sever 
The  holiest  ties  of  kindred,  country,  home, 
For  party  agitation,  froth,  and  spume. 

XI. 

'•'  I  think  the  Fates  have  had  this  tangled  skein, 

Or  Ethiopian  snarl,  too  long  already 
Upon  their  distaffs ;  and  I'll  cut  in  twain 

Its  Gordian  meshes,  if  Asmodeus,"  said  he, 
"  Will  do  my  bidding — take  my  subterrene, 

Or  night-express  train,  to  that '  land  of  steady 
Habits,'  where  the  doctors  of  divinity 
Hang  their  strict  morals  on  their  strict  Latinity  ! 


59 

XII. 

"  This  land,  I'm  told,  is  set  down  on  the  maps 
As  bordering  on  that  modern  Dahomy 

Called  Massachusetts,  the  best  place,  perhaps, 
To  learn  what  doctors  of  divinity  say  o'me  ; 

For  there  they  deal  in  spiritual  raps 
From  such  '  damn'd  ghosts'  as  seek  to  go  astray  o 

And  turn  the  heads  of^her  literati, 

From  little  u,  (of  course,)  to  thumping  great  It 

XIII. 

And  here  the  Devil  summoned  his  own  shade, 
The  imp  Asmodeus,  to  the  double  task  6 

Of  getting  up  a  Boozoo  masquerade 
And  a  grand  Ethiopian  bal-au-masque, 

To  show  the  mighty  race  off,  which  had  made 
The  earth  to  shake  and  shiver  like  an  asp, 

Or  reel  as  if  some  comet's  tail  had  struck  it 

'Twixt  wind  and  weather,  just  to  kick  its  bucket ! 

XIV 

The  shadow  came,  a  low,  squat,  ugly  figure, 
That  looked  as  if  it  might  have  been  a  shade 

Fresh  from  the  pit  of  the  old  arch -intriguer, 
Whose  substance  had  this  grisly  shadow  made; 

One  that  like  Nachash  Canaan,  or  the  "  nigger," 
Showed  that  knee-bending  was  his  supple  trade; — 7 

In  fact,  his  genuflections  were  so  numerous, 

The  Devil  thought  his  shadow  had  grown  humorous. 


60 

xv. 

And  thus  accosted  it,  in  his  blunt  way : 
"  Asmodeus,  you're  a  trump  !  as  I  can  swear 
Upon  a  stack  of  Talmuds,  if  need  be  ; 

With  Machiavelian  craft  enough  to  share 
The  honors  of  the  empire  I  survey 

And  call  my  own,  by  right  established  clear ; 
And  I've  a  mission  worth  your  while  to  grace 
With  all  your  subtile  cunning  and  grimace. 

XVI. 

'  A  certain  clerical  consociation, 

Which  has  the  '  negro  largely  on  the  brain,' 
Would  run  a  muck,  it  seems,  with  all  creation, 

Or  with  my  empire,  which  is  much  the  same ; 
And  hence  propose  their  schemes  of  mis'genation 

To  mitigate  the  curse  pronounced  on  Cain ; 
Or  rather,  furnish  octoroons  free  gratis, 
Until  a  sated  North  cries  out,  "jam  satis  !" 

XVII. 

'  This  scheme,  I  think,  would  suit  a  "  loyal"  Turk, 
Not  too  fastidious  on  the  point  of  color, 

If  he  would  only  set  himself  to  work 
To  damn  his  soul,  and  save  an  honest  dollar  ; 

For  harems  are  expensive,  and  the  dirk 

Of  dark-eyed  Georgian  maids  is  apt  to  follow 

The  course  of  their  quick  blood,  if  not  desire, 

When  passion  sets  their  liquid  veins  on  fire. 


61 

XVIII. 

'  Now  what  I  seek,  Asmodeus,"  said  the  Devil 

With  all  the  suaviter  in  modo  he 
Apparently  could  summon  to  be  civil 

To  his  own  shadow — "  is  pure  deviltry : — 
The  Simon  pure,  that  savors  dark  of  evil, 

Yet  has  a  smack  of  outward  piety  ; 
As  when  the  Puritanic  clergy  take 
My  settled  plans  in  hand  for  conscience  sake, 

XIX. 

'  And  put  them  through  with  diabolic  unction  ; 

As  they  have  done  on  more  than  one  occasion 
When  integrating  my  satanic  function, 

Or  differential  of  a  soul's  equation ; 
Showing  a  sort  of  mathematic  gumption 

At  working  out  my  problems  of  damnation, 
In  which  I  purposely  extract  one  sin 
As  a  mere  springe  to  get  their  best  foot  in  ! 

XX. 

1  What  devil  would  not  grin  a  ghastly  smile, 
To  see  them  catch  at  this  stale  trick  of  mine, 

As  if  it  were  my  province  to  beguile 

With  craft  transparent,  luminous  and  thin  ; 

And  they  were  gulls  to  be  'winged  in'  the  while, 
By  springes  to  catch  woodcock — plated  sin  : — 

In  fact,  whenever  sin  I  chance  to  plate, 

They  snap  like  very  turtles  at  my  bait ! 


62 

XXI. 

"  I  perched  the  negro  lately  on  the  cross, 

With  this  inscription — 'in  hoc  signo  vinces;' 

And  though  the  trick  was  vile  as  it  was  gross, 
They  caught  at  it  as  urchins  catch  at  quinces, 

When  they  perceive  their  flavor  and  their  gloss  ; 
And  though  their  appetite  a  little  winces 

At  the  first  taste,  they  finally  agree 

The  fruit  is  luscious — hanging  on  a  tree ! 

XXII. 

'  So  with  my  '  Afric  martyr'  hanging  high, 
As  hangs  the  '  goose'  in  highfalutin'  strain,  8 

No  sooner  does  he  catch  a  parson's  eye 

Than,  lo  !  the  rocks  again  are  rent  in  twain, 

And  shattered  is  the  cross  of  Calvary ; 
Up  goes  the  '  ebon  idol'  for  the  slain 

Messiah,  and  a  feticism  vile 

Rings  through  the  lofty  arch  and  vaulted  aisle. 

XXIII. 

'  All  household  gods  are  stricken  down  at  once, 
Churches  abandoned,  or  abandon  grown  ; 

Zeal,  maddened  into  rage,  obscures  and  blunts 
The  moral  sense,  till  moral  sense  there's  none ; 

Wisdom  is  badgered  in  her  house ;  an  ounce 
Of  sheerest  folly  weighs  her  down  a  ton ; 

And  though  her  price  is  far  above  all  rubies, 

This  '  Afric  nonsense1  is  the  milk  of  boobies !  a 


63 

XXIV. 

"  Now  the  high  mission  I  would  have  you  grace," 

Continued  Satan  to  his  grisly  shade, 
"  Is  to  erect  this  Idol  in  the  place 

Of  every  martyr-hero  that  has  bled 
On  cross  or  rack,  to  gratify  caprice 

Or  whim  or  malice,  since  the  world  was  made. 
Down  with  the  dying  Christ  upon  the  tree ! 
Up  with  my  fetisch  gods  in  ebony  !" 

XXV. 

And  Satan  waved  his  iron  scepter  high 
Above  the  smoke  of  hell.    A  gesture  wide 

It  seemed,  as  when  two  clouds  obscure  the  sky 
From  some  high  mountain  cone,  on  either  side 

Outstretching  their  huge  length  as  far  as  eye 
Can  reach,  or  objects  be  descried : 

A.  mighty  cloud-capp'd  Teneriffe  he  stood, 

In  grand,  majestic,  awful  attitude  ! 

XXVI. 

And  bade  Asmodeus  to  the  earth  repair 
Upon  his  mission,  without  further  stay 

For  such  instructions  as  he  needed  there  ; 
And  though  it  was  a  somewhat  dubious  way, 

And  led  through  fields  obscure  of  nether  air, 
There  was  no  chance  for  him  to  go  astray  ; 

For  one  continuous  stream  of  horror  poured 

Itself  along,  from  earth  to  hell  abhorred. 


64 

XXVII. 

Asmodeus  heard,  and  leapt  upon  the  train 

Of  fire-wing'd  cars,  that  'neath  the  crusted  earth 

Ply  with  infernal  steam,  which  to  maintain 
Gives  mad  volcanoes,  like  Vesuvius,  birth  ; 

When  they  essay  their  pent-up  fires  in  vain 
To  hold,  and  ever  and  anon  belch  forth 

A  stream  of  lava,  which  would  seem  to  be 

The  slag  of  hell — its  dross  and  scoriae. 

XXVIII. 

It  was  a  mad  vehicular  affair, 

The  swift-sure  that  he  took,  and  seemed  to  be 
Impelled  by  fiery  demons  through  the  air, 

Whenever  it  emerged  to  light  of  day 
From  out  the  depths  of  subterrene  despair, 

Through  deep  volcanic  fissures  in  the  sea ; 
And  what  was  strange,  it  did  not  seem  to  fly, 
But  rather  to  pitch  headlong  through  the  sky. 

XXIX. 

I  know  not  where  he  first  emerged  to  light, 
(I  mean  Asmodeus  on  his  fiery  car,) 

But  one  thing's  certain,  it  was  dead  o'night 
When  he  first  flashed — a  meteoric  star — 

Upon.  Yale's  clever,  astronomic  sight ; 
Bringing  her  grand  Herschelian  to  bear 

Upon  his  train,  that  flashed  along  the  sky 

Like  gleams  of  hate  shot  from  a  devil's  eye  ! 


65 

XXX. 

Again  this  famous  institution  notes, 

On  her  celestial  chart,  a  cosmic  wonder  ; 

And  in  her  mighty  erudition  quotes 
A  line  or  two  (and  that  without  a  blunder) 

From  the  great  Almagest,  to  prove  that  motes, 
Or  rather  certain  molecules,  forced  asunder 

By  any  sudden  jerk,  will  give  out  light 

Much  like  the  strange  phenomenon  that  night. 

XXXI. 

And  in  her  journal  of  transcendent  science, 
Devoted  to  all  sorts  of  tongues  and  knowledges, 

Shows  how  a  mad,  erratic  world  may  fly  hence, 
By  not  observing  the  fixed  laws  of  all  ages ; 

Or  not  depending,  as  its  chief  reliance 
For  mental  pabulum,  on  certain  colleges, 

Where  doctors  of  divinity  and  laws, 

Confound  all  learning  to  explain  all  cause. 

XXXII. 

Asmodeus  landed  on  the  college  green 
Just  as  some  students  would  the  devil  raise, 

And  found  two  grave  professors  on  the  keen 
Lookout  for  deviltry,  in  all  its  ways ; 

Who,  at  the  sight  of  tail  his  legs  between, 
Imagined  him  a  "Soph."  upon  a  "haze," 

And  seized  him  by  the  collar,  to  assure  him 

That  of  his  deviltry  they  soon  would  cure  him  ! 


XXXIII. 

Asmodeus,  who  had  just  arrived  from  limbo, 
With  a  carte  blanche  to  travel  where  he  pleased, 

From  ice-bound  Hecla  down  to  burning  Chimbo, 
Was  somewhat  nonplussed  at  thus  being  seized  ; 

And,  with  defiant  air  and  arms  akimbo, 

Demanded  instantly  to  be  released  : — 
"  Unhand  me,  sirs  !  or  you'll  provoke  a  tussle, 

In  which  I'll  travel  squarely  on  my  muscle !" 

XXXIV. 

"  His  insolence  is  '  swilled,'  I  do  declare," 

Said  one  professor  gravely  to  the  other  ; 
"  I  never  heard  the  like  from  thief  or  liar, 

And  will  not  brook  it  for  an  instant  further, 
The  pugilistic  rascal !     Look  you  here, 

You  nase  curmudgeon  of  a  base-born  mother  ! 
D'you  think  we'll  take  you're  insolence  thus  crammed  ?" 
"You  will,"  replied  Asmodeus,  "when  you're  damned." 

XXXV. 

This  was  too  much  for  any  senior  "  prof.," 

Especially  of  Yale,  to  take,  or  stand ; 
And  bidding  him  peremptorily  to  doff 

Both  tile  and  tail,  they  took  his  case  in  hand, 
Or  thought  to  do  so,  when  he  sidled  off 

As  if  his  legs  were  not  at  his  command  ; 
And,  with  a  sudden  dash  to,  like  a  shutter, 
Sent  both  professors  sprawling  in  the  gutter. 


67 
xxxvi. 

I  beg  your  pardon,  senior  wranglers,"  said  he, 
"  'Twas  on  my  part  an  accidental  stumble  ; 

Your  legs  or  mine  must  have  become  unsteady, 
To  get  mixed  up  in  such  an  awkward  tumble ; 

But  accidents  will  happen  when  you're  heady, 
At  which,  for  one,  I  never  care  to  grumble: 

I'm  at  your  service,  sirs,  if  you'll  be  civil, 

And  not  with  me  attempt  to  play  the  devil. 

XXXVII. 

I'm  not,  as  you  first  supposed,  a  student, 
But  an  ambassador,  with  full  credentials, 

From  his  consummate  majesty  and  prudent, 

Who  stands  the  most  potential  'mong  potentials, 

And,  'mong  true  gentlemen,  the  only  true  gent.; 
If  you  consider  all  the  grand  essentials 

To  true  gentility,  which  .are  to  make 

The  world  an  ass  to  bear  you  on  its  back ! 

XXXVIII. 

Now  my  most  high,  puissant,  noble  master, 
Who  sends  me  here  with  my  credentials  greeting, 

Has  all  of  these ;  and,  what  is  more,  lives  faster 
Than  any  roue  you  might  chance  to  meet  in 

Paris,  were  you  to  spend  your  last  piaster 

In  search  of  one  the  most  frequented  street  in  ; 

And  yet  he  lives  no  faster  than  he  should, 

With  his  estates  of  such  vast  amplitude, 

• 


68 
xxxix. 

"And  such  diversity  of  range.    For  he 

Has  secret  leagues  with  almost  every  nation, 

By  which  they  grant  him  their  domains  in  fee, 
For  nothing  in  return  but  a  '  dotation,' 

Or  eleemosynary  gift — to  be 
Used  by  himself  and  them  in  such  rotation, 

That  every  time  the  wheel  of  fortune  turns, 

He  takes  the  '  plenty,'  they  the  empty  '  horns.' 

XL. 

'•*  I  instance  these  particulars  that  you, 

Who  teach  Columbia's  young  ideas  to  shoot, 

May  duly  pay  all  proper  homage  to 

My  master,  whose  grand  scheme  I  have  on  foot 

Which  is,  to  put  this  '  blasted'  country  through 
A  '  course  of  sprouts,'  beginning  at  the  root, 

And  thereon  grafting,  in  their  proper  place, 

My  '  Afric  scions'  to  improve  her  race." 

XLI. 

'  Sir,"  interrupted  one  professor  here, 
With  an  apologetic  hem  !  or  two, 
As  if  his  throat  from  some  stray  frog  he'd  clear, 

"We  little  thought  you  were  a  'plenipo.' 
From  the  great  Afric  Mongul,  as  you  are, 
And  would  apologize  for  this  slight  show 
Of  disrespect.    We  took  you  for  another, 
And  not  an  anthropophagus  or  brother!" 


69 

XLII. 

Asmodeus  answered  :  "  'Tis  not  your  apology, 
So  amply  offered,  that  I  care  to  take  ; 

What  I  would  rather  have,  is  your  theology 
Chained  with  my  '  Afric  martyr'  to  the  stake  ; 

So  that  my  master's  science,  anthropology, 
May  give  religion  such  another  thwack 

As  she  once  got  in  France,  when  hell  let  loose 

The  human  passions,  to  their  last  mad  sluice  ! 

XLIII. 

'  There  I  enthroned  pure  reason  in  such  shape 
That  the  impure  embraced  her  at  first  sight, 

And  e'en  the  virtuous  stood  with  mouth  agape, 
And  eyed  my  '  strumpet  goddess'  with  delight ; — 

A  nymph  du  pave  that  I  chanced  to  scrape 
Up  in  a  faubourg,  ou  demeure  V elite  ; 

And  made  a,  fete  in  Paris  to  parade  her, 

As  nude  as  Nature's  cunning  hand  had  made  her  ! 

XLIV. 

'  This  was  my  modus  operandi  then, 

To  run  the  world  upon  the  shoals  of  felly — 

A  stranded  bark  to  ne'er  set  sail  again  ; 
But  some  rude  tars  aboard,  more  wise  than  jolly. 

Veered  her  to  windward  and  thus  spoiled  my  plan  ; 
But  now  the  seas  are  rough,  the  banks  are  shoaly. 

And  the  mad  bark  is  rushing  down  the  gale, 

As  if  the  devil  were  in  every  sail. 

5 


70 

XLV. 

'  Before  her  are  Charybdis  and  wild  Scylla ; 

On  either  hand,  those  fierce  Celsenos  dire, 
Whose  syren  music  lulls  the  angry  billow, 

Yet  more  enrages  the  deep  smouldering  fire 
Her  hulks  beneath ;  behind,  a  cloudy  pillar, 

Girt  with  red  lightnings  like  a  funeral  pyre ; 
While  the  mad  breakers  upward  leap,  and  fling 
Their  mane  aside,  as  at  her  throat  they  spring. 

XLVI. 

'  'Tis  a  wild  phlegethon,  or  hell  of  waters, 

In  which  she  struggles ;  and  around  her  yawns 

Destruction,  like  the  Belides,  or  daughters 
Of  old  Danaus,  when  the  dull  day  dawns ; 

Hope  takes  her  flight,  and  'safety  idly  loiters 
Like  a  whipt  school-boy,  by  the  wayside  lawns, 

Unheeding  his  straight  path  ;  while  the  rude  sea 

Chafes  like  a  tiger  when  he  snuffs  his  prey. 

XL  VII. 

"There's  but  one  remedy  for  all  this  broil, 

And  elemental  strife,"  continued  he  ; 
"  'Tis  not  to  pour  your  theologic  oil 

Upon  the  troubled  waters  of  this  sea  ; 
But  rather  ventilate  your  pulpit  bile, 

And  Puritanic  rancor,  till  you  free 
The  '  nigger,'  and  let  loose  your  full-mouthed  pack 
Of  '  Zion's  bloodhounds'  on  the  white  man's  track  !  J  ° 


71 

XLVIII. 

"  Your  grand  artistic  idea  of  this  race, 

May  then  be  chiseled  by  some  future  Phidias, 

Whose  hand  shall  bring  out  their  historic  face, 
In  all  its  glory,  by  his  arts  lapideous  ; 

Making  the  breathing  marble  glow  apace 
With  future  Dinahs,  for  the  most  fastidious  ; 

Or  future  Sambos,  to  adorn  some  niche 

Transcendently  above  the  white  man's  reach  !"  J1 

XLIX. 

Here  both  professors  interrupt  Asmodeus, 

As  if  a  simultaneous  tongue  they  wagged  : 
"  We  beg  your  pardon,  sir,  but  when  Herodias 
Got  John  the  Baptist's  head  securely  bagged, 

'Twas  not  so  much  the  act  that  made  her  odious, 
As  that  her  daughter  into  it  she  dragged ; 

And  though  the  negro  is  indeed  our  'brother,' 

He's  not  our  sister,  nor  our  brother's  mother,  1 2 


4  Nor  our  great  aunt,  nor  yet  a  dozen  score 
Of  nieces  we  might  name,  or  second  cousins  ; 

Nor  our  intended  second  wife,  what's  more, 

Nor  children  by  her,  though  they  come  by  dozens 

And  to  engender  strife  and  civil  war 
That  we  may  mis'genate  with  '  colored  pussons,' 

Would  damn  us  all  effectually  the  same, 

As  was  Herodias  by  her  daughter's  shame." 


72 

LI. 

"You  reason  like  the  schoolmen  of  most  colleges," 
Replied  Asmodeus,  "  and  I  do  not  wonder 

You  sometimes  make  a  balk  in  your  theologies 
As  crude  in  fact  as  this  historic  blunder  : 

'Twas  not  Herodias  (begging  your  apologies) 
Who  brought  herself  the  ban  so  vilely  under  ; 

But  rather  Herod,  surnamed  Antipas, 

Who  for  Salome  made  himself  an  ass  ! 

LII. 

"  Now  I  am  posted  in  the  Pentateuch, 

The  Law,  the  Prophets,  Esther,  Ezra,  Ruth, 

Job  and  the  Canticles,  and  sometimes  look 
Into  the  Proverbs  for  a  musty  truth  ; 

And  when  I  see  your  college  Rabbis  choke 
At  the  Mosaic  teachings,  as  if  loth 

To  swallow  what  is  said  of  Nachash-Canaan, 

I  know  the  devil's  got  you  well  in  trainin.' 

LIII. 

"  'Tis  his  first  lesson  in  Satanic  drill 

To  knock  the  sand  from  underneath  some  Babel, 
Or  tongue-confounding  principle,  until 

You  come  to  treat  it  as  an  idle  fable, 
Though  truth  it  be  that  Sinai  thunders  still ; 

And  toppling  down  your  faith  as  fast  as  able, 
He  builds  upon  its  ruins,  dark  and.high, 
His  massive  piles  of  Infidelity. 


73 

LIV. 

"These  frown  already  like  some  giant  ghauts 
Above  your  schools  of  dead  divinity,  13 

Darkening  the  outline  of  your  very  thoughts 
With  atheistic  shadows  gathering  nigh  ; 

While  theologic  mushrooms  of  all  sorts 

Spontaneous  spring  beneath  your  very  eye, — 

The  natural  upgrowth  of  the  soil  you  till, 

With  your  hypostasis  and  '  dogged  will.' 

LY. 

'  You're  complimentary,  in  your  way,  sir,  very ;" 

"Who's  not,"  replied  Asmodeus,  "is  not  civil ;" 
'And  your  'hypostasis'  suggests  a  query  :" 

"  Pray  what  is  that  ?"     "  The  substance  of  the  devil. 
'  Ah,  you're  facetious — seem  in  fact  quite  merry — 

As  you  essay  to  extirpate  all  evil ; 
But  strike  the  devil  out  of  your  ontology, 
And  where  the  devil  would  be  your  theology  ?" 

LVI. 

'  Odi  profanum  vulgus"  they  retort ; 

" Et  arcco"  is  Asmodeus'  prompt  reply ; 
'The  devil  and  Dr.  Parr !  what  don't  he  quote  ?" 

"  Your  '  concios-ad  clerum'  done  up  dry ; 
Though  one  might  do  so  as  a  last  resort, 

If  not  afflicted  with  a  'critic's  eye;' 
As  few,  if  any,  are  inclined  to  be, 
Who  listen  to  your  prosy,  dull  D.  D." 


74 

LVII. 

This  was  the  "  most  unkindesi  cut  of  all ;" 

Asmodeus  felt  'twas  rude — nay,  downright  rough  ; 

But  then  he'd  got  to  play  a  certain  rile, 
In  which  to  swagger,  put  on  airs,  and  bluff, 

Was  more  essential  far  than  to  cajole, 
Or  even  get  himself  into  a  huff ; 

And  so  he  took  the  bull  square  by  the  horns, 

And  trod  thus  sharply  the  professors'  corns. 

LVIII. 

'  I  come,  as  I  informed  you,  from  my  master, 
The  potentate  you  dread,  and  yet  most  serve, 

By  turning  out  your  vile  politicaster, 

To  starve  the  soul  and  the  mad  passions  nerve, 

Instead  of  the  old-fashioned  village  pastor, 

Who  from  his  Christian  course  would  never  swerve 

But  pressed  towards  Zion  with  his  eager  flock, 

Content  to  bear  his  shepherd's  staff  and  crook. 

LIX. 

"  In  this  you've  served  the  devil  as  you  ought, 
And  trod  his  wily  paths  with  proper  head, 

Shod  with  the  preparation  you  have  sought 
In  hell's  politico-religious  creed, — 

The  potent  lever  with  which  he  has  brought 
Your  country  to  uprise,  and  madly  shed 

Her  blood  like  water  from  hot  Geysers  spent, 

To  introduce  his  '  Afric  element'." 


75 

LX. 

"  Tis  a  vile  slander  by  the  devil  coined," 
They  both  at  once  indignantly  reply ; 
"  If  so,"  Asmodeus  instantly  rejoined, 

"  How  happens  it  that  you  incessantly 
Harp  on  the  '  nigger,'  as  if  you  could  find 

No  loftier  strain  to  touch  your  heartstrings  by ; 
Not  even  Homer's  verse— grown  stale  the  while — 
Your  '  blind  old  man  of  Scio's  rocky  isle  ?' 

LXI. 

"  And  what  is  more,  how  happens  it  that  you, 

Through  all  your  many  classic  shades  and  walks, 

Have  kept,  and  still  keep,  constantly  in  view 
The  weather-guage  of  party  weather-cocks ; 

And  from  their  rabid  teachings  take  your  cue, 
No  matter  how  the  firm  foundation  rocks, 

Of  church  and  state,  or  what  the  maddened  cry 

For  right  or  wrong,  when  men  dare  do  or  die  ? 

LXII. 

"Call  it  a  'slander  by  the  devil  coined  !' 
Out  on  your  paltry  Puritanic  shams  ! 

I  find  you  to  my  Afric  idols  joined, 

And  know  your  faith— how  £$?,&(  any,  qualms 

Of  conscience  you  have  had  of  any  kind, 

In  all  your  mighty  range  of  '  whims'  and  '  whams; 

From  the  great  'Moon  Hoax,'  to  the  incessant  jar  14 

'Bout  human  rights  in — Borrioboolagha ! 


76 

LXIII 

'  And  now  when  I  demand  that  you  shall  stare 

The  logic  of  events  full  in  their  face, 
And  meet  the  questions  openly  and  square 

That  appertain  to  my  generic  race, 
You  put  on  airs  and  look  as  if  you  were 

An  unborn  babe  to  all  this  bloody  farce  ; 
And  raise  your  hands,  as  'twere  in  holy  horror, 
At  rnis'genation,  which  must  come  to-morrow  !  *  5 

LXIV. 

1  How  long  is't  since  you  held  your  North  Church  meeting, 
And  afterwards  your  grand  Alumni  dinner, 

To  send  to  Kansas  your  new  Bible  greeting, 
And  shoot  the  gospel  into  every  sinner  ? 

Your  anti-slavery  Bible,  with  one  sheet  in, 
Leaded  to  kill,  or  rather  prove  the  winner    „ 

Of  soul  and  body  both  at  the  same  time, 

Should  Christian  clergymen  but  *  cock  and  prime  ?' 

LXV. 

'  And  who  so  fierce  at  doing  this  as  they  ? 

Not  old  Suwarroff,  with  his  Calmucks  drilling 
Before  the  walls  of  Ismail,  in  his  day ; 

Who  practiced  in  the  '  noble  art  of  killing' 
As  a  mere  pastime  to  while  time  away  ; 

And  valued  less  a  human  life  than  shilling  : 
It  being  always  past  his  comprehension 
To  save  a  life,  except  to  save  a  pension. 


77 

LXVI. 

'  And  yet  this  Russian  could  not  hold  a  candle 
To  Zion's  thirstier  bloodhounds  of  your  day, 

Though  Providence  designed  that  he  should  handle 
An  army  quite  as  cleverly  as  they  ; 

If  not  to  keep  himself  as  free  from  scandal, 

When  women  chanced  to  come  within  his  way  ;   J  6 

For  old  Suwarroff  to  the  sex  was  civil, 

Although  he  cared  for  neither  flesh  nor  devil. 

LXVII. 

"  I  like  consistency.    It  is  a  jewel 

That  more  becomes  a  man  than  does  discretion 
A  fair  woman,  which  carries  her  through  ill 

And  good  report,  whate'er  their  false  impression  ; 
Oft  snatching  honor  from  a  grasp  more  cruel 

And  splenetic  than  death,  as  its  possession ; 
And  yet  as  often,  in  sad  sooth  to  say, 
Casting  the  pearl  in  some  mad  freak  away. 

LXVIII. 

'  I  like  consistency  in  man  or  devil ; 

It  is  a  jewel  that  doth  appertain 
To  a  swine's  snout,  beyond  all  doubt  or  cavil, 

( Vide  the  Proverbs,  whence  the  met'phor's  ta'en.) 
A  fortiori  does't  pertain  to  civil 

Rank  and  distinction,  which  to  rightly  gain, 
Demands  the  even  tenor  of  one's  way. 
No  matter  what  the  devil  is  to  pay  ! 


78 

LXIX. 

'  But  when  I  see  your  college  Esaus  sell 

Their  classic  birthright  for  a  mess  of  pottage 

Brewed  by  that  abolition  Jezebel, 

Who  bids  defiance  to  no  matter  what  age, 

And  glories  in  her  shame,  the  hag  of  hell; 
I  wonder  not  the  world  is  in  its  dotage, 

Or  that  its  brazen,  brainless  asses  share 

Alone  its  honors,  as  they  do  its  care." 

LXX. 

And  here  Asmodeus  made  an  end  of  speaking ; 

'Twas  not  his  trade,  he  said,  "  sic  finis  fandi;" 
He  hated  those  whose  tongues  were  always  creaking 

With  rusty  maxims,  more  intent  to  bandy 
A  truth  for  error's  sake  than  to  be  seeking 

Truth  for  her  own  :  a  trick  they  had  as  handy 
As  any  craft  the  devil  could  well  show, 
With  all  his  nameless  handicraft  below. 

LXXI. 

With  this  the  grisly  shadow  disappeared, 
Or  rather  vanished  from  material  sight, 

Leaving  the  grave  professors,  who  still  peered 
Into  the  gloom  of  that  ghost-ridden  night ; 

While  everything  about  them  seemed  so  weird 
And  goblin-shaped,  it  set  them  in  affright, 

And  turned  their  capillaceous  tufts  as  gray 

As  any  rat's  that  had  outlived  his  day. 


79 

LXXII. 

Perhaps  you've  seen,  far  out  upon  the  waters, 
Some  white  gulls  skimming  o'er  the  evening  sea ; 

Just  as  the  Nereids — Neptune's  fair-haired  daughters,  J  7 
With  their  sweet  Triton-shells,  came  merrily 

Up  from  their  ocean  beds,  with  neither  garters, 
Nor  cinctured  robe,  nor  belt,  nor  kirtle  free ; 

As  if  their  '  angry  god'  they  sought  to  please, 

With  new-born  graces,  laughter,  mirth  and  ease. 

LXXIII. 

If  you  have  seen  them,  you  have  marked  their  flight — 
I  mean  the  gulls,  not  Nereids — and  have  noted 

How  close  they  kept  the  finny  tribes  in  sight, 
As  seemingly  on  some  old  fish  they  doted  ; 

And  how  they  darted  from  their  dizzy  height, 
Or  some  steep  crag  that  o'er  the  water  jutted, 

And,  like  an  arrow,  shot  beneath  the  wave, 

As  if  they  sought  some  finny  life  to  save ! 

LXXIV. 

If  you  have  noted  this,  you've  noted  further; 

The  swift  up-flying  of  the  two  together — 
The  bird  and  fish — as  close  as  any  brother ; 

Apparently  to  seek  some  distant  heather, 
Where  they  might  have  a  love-feast,  one  with  t'other, 

And  be  both  sheltered  from  the  wind  and  weather ; 
And  noting  this,  you've  no  doubt  wondered  why 
The  finny  tribes  should  ever  seek  to  fly. 


80 

LXXV. 

And  you,  no  doubt,  have  drawn  from  this  a  moral, 

Applied  as  well  to  men  as  little  fishes ; 
And  have  inferred,  that,  though  the  world  was  for  all, 

All  were  not  made  to  dine  from  golden  dishes  ; 
That  He,  who  gemmed  the  sea  with  beds  of  coral, — 

Enamelled  earth  and  sky,  and  raised  man's  wishes 
And  aspirations  to  the  heavens  high, — 
Knew  no  such  law  as  base  Equality  ! 

LXXYI. 

Equality  is  death,  and  Death  a  leveler, 

Or  hell-born  radical  of  the  worst  type ; 
Who  wars  'gainst  all  distinctions,  a  grand  reveler 

In  blood  and  carnage,  when  the  world  is  ripe 
As  now  for  slaughter ;  or  when  priests  bedevil  her 

With  their  theologies,  and  cry  "  Let  slip 
The  dogs  of  war,"  that  they  may  hold  the  purse, 
The  sword,  the  mitre,  and  the  blunderbuss  ! 

LXXVII. 

Equality  is  death,  and  Death  a  jester, 

Who  flings  his  fatal  gibes  as  well  as  darts, 

And  mocks  at  all  distinctions,  as  at  best  a 
Sheer  delusion  that  some  jest  imparts ; 

Heeding  no  more  the  blasts  of  a  Nor'wester 
Through  his  stark  ribs,  than  Zephyrus  when  he  starts 

Up  from  his  languid  couch,  with  humid  eyes, 

And  hastes  away  where  bright-eyed  Flora  lies. 


81 

LXXVIII. 

Equality  is  death,  and  Death  a  preacher, 
"  Fierce  as  ten  furies — terrible  as  hell ;" 
Quite  as  "  sensational,"  in  fact,  as  Beecher, 

If  not  as  orthodox  and  radical; 
Fearless  to  be  o'ermatched  by  any  teacher, 

However  Christless  he,  or  infidel ; 
Though  preaching,  it  may  be,  for  "greenback"  salary, 
Piled  up  by  knaves,  to  reach  from  nave  to  gallery  ! 

LXXIX. 

Equality  is  death,  and  Death  a  foe 

To  all  diversity  that  life  outspeaks 
In  manifold  expressiveness,  below ; 

In  war's  rude  shock,  his  fiery  dart  he  breaks, 
And  on  his  pale  horse  hurries  to  and  fro, 

As  when  some  mighty  pestilence  he  shakes ; 
Warring  with  embryon  atoms  as  they  spring, 
Lithe  and  light-armed,  against  his  shadowy  wing ! 

LXXX. 

Diversity  is  life,  and  Life  is  light, 

Though  shj&t  from  orb  in  Orphiucus'  train, 

Or  feeblest  taper  that  outburns  the  night ; 
The  greater  and  the  lesser,  are  but  one ; — 

Their  inequality  is  God's  own  right 

To  fix,  as  suits  his  purpose  and  his  plan  : 

So  with  the  talents  he  dispenses  here, 

Some  have,  some  have  not,  yet  all  have  their  share. 


82 

LXXXI. 

Diversity  is  life,  and  Life  was  given, 
As  the  all-bounteous  gift  of  God  to  man ; 

It  now  uplifts  the  clod  from  earth  to  heaven, 
And  nof  returns  to  vivify  again ; 

By  its  cherubic  shaft  the  cloud  is  riven, 

Down  whose  bright  clifts  descends  the  golden  rain— 

The  shower  of  life  and  light,  from  heaven  above, 

The  fount  ineffable,  and  source  of  love. 

LXXXII. 

Diversity  is  life,  and  Life  a  stream, 

Adown  whose  rapid  current  ever  glide 
Thought-freighted  barks,  with  mystic  oars  that  gleam 

In  the  soul's  star-shine;  and  whose  flashings  chide 
The  hasty-footed  hours  that  seem  a  dream — 

A  dream  that  ever  flits  itself  beside ; 
Though  here  and  there  a  golden  oar  you  see, 
Dipped  by  the  hand  of  pale  Mnemosyne ! 

LXXXIII. 

Diversity  is  life,  and  Life  an  ocean 
Fed  by  a  thousand  streams,  as  $  the  sea ; 

Some  great,  some  small,  some  swifter  in  their  motion ; 
Some  slower-paced,  and  some  impetuously 

O'erleaping  barriers ;  as  if  they'd  a  notion 
That  their  tremendous  volumes  would  outweigh 

All  others  in  their  course,  could  they  but  breast 

The  topmost  wave,  and  shake  its  mighty  crest ! 


83 

LXXXIV. 

Asmodeus  "  vamosed,"  as  we  meant  to  say ; 

But  left  behind  him  such  a  smell,  or  savor, 
Or  complex  fragrance — call  it  what  you  may — 

(Hot  pitch  and  lavender  would  give  the  flavor, 
Combined  with  sulphur  in  a  certain  way — ) 

It  seemed  like  "  flesh  and  devil,"  finding  favor 
With  Puritanic  clergy,  in  these  days, 
Who  deal  in  party  shibboleths,  not  grace ! 

LXXXV. 

The  grave  professors  looked  a  little  "  blue — " 

The  color  is  historic — at  his  flight ; 
Or  rather,  looked  as  men  do  who've  crept  through 

Some  several  "  knot-holes,"  to  get  out  of  sight ; 
Just  what  he  said,  they  neither  of  them  knew. 

For  hearing  is  a  sense  made  blunt  by  fright ; 
But  then  their  ears  were  flushed,  and  burned  and  tingled, 
As  if  they'd  been  by  some  sharp  weapon  swingled 

LXXXVI. 

But  I  must  leave  my  "  grave  professors"  here, 
And  let  the  Muse  her  epic  march  still  hold, 

Upon  the  one  straight  theme — Asmodeus  rare : 
The  shadowy  imp  that  representsthe  "  Old," 

Or  "  Ancient  Harry,"  on  this  mundane  sphere, 

In  all  the  craft  with  which  earth's  fools  are  fooled ; 

Especially  the  "  shaven  and  the  shorn," 

Fools  to  the  pulpit,  and  the  "  manner,"  born  ! 


84 

LXXXVII. 

As  swift  as  thought  when  idly  it  takes  wing 
For  more  discursive  flight,  Asmodeus  flew, 

And  instantly  "  turned  up" — a  dapperling, 

Or  low  squat  dwarf,  with  face  of  ghjrstly  hue — 

Within  a  parson's  bed-room.     How  the  thing 
Was  done,  that  is  to  say,  how  he  got  through 

Some  several  key-holes,  I  must  not  unravel, 

Since  theologic  science  craves  the  marvel. 

LXXXVIII. 

I'll  venture  no  hypothesis,  or  doubt, 

Or  rationale,  therefore,  of  the  wonder  ; 
I  only  know  the  devil  had  found  out 

A  way  to  get  through,  without  slip  or  blunder ; 
And  never  ventures  to  obtrude  his  snout 

A  key-hole  through,  or  lattice  window  under, 
Without  first  knowing  that  the  "coast  is  clear," 
Or  that  his  presence  is  demanded  there. 

LXXXIX. 

And  so  he  entered.    On  a  couch  there  lay 

A  reverend  preacher,  of  some  three-score  years 

And  ten,  or  thereabouts,  (a  year  or  day 
Is  not  material,  save  when  one's  hairs 

My  some  mishap  turn  prematurely  gray,) 
Whose  frame  and  mind  both  seemed,  by  mutual  cares, 

To  have  grown  old  together,  or  to  be 

In  their  last  stages  of  senility. 


85 
xc. 

But  these  deceived;  at  least,  to  casual  sight, 
Or  observation,  as  the  sleeper  seemed 

Half  conscious  of  the  presence  of  the  sprite 
That  in  his  ear  poured  solace  as  he  dreamed ; 

And  roused  his  latent  faculties  that  night 
To  such  a  pitch  of  ecstacy,  he  deemed 

The  past  secure,  arid  ample  laurels  twined 

For  his  own  brow,  in  future  jousts  of  mind !  1 8 

XCI. 

In  other  words,  the  devil  had  his  ear, 
And  tickled  it  sublimely  with  a  straw  ; 

Or  such  transcendent  fooleries  as  are 

Tricked  out,  in  wisdom's  garb,  like  purple  daw ; 

Until  the  dreamer  dreamed  he  had  no  peer 
In  ethics,  morals,  metaphysics,  law, 

Or  the  "  humanities,"  which  were  his  boast, 

As  virtue  is  of  her  whose  virtue's  lost. 

XCH. 

Yet,  of  the  sweet  "  humanities,"  he'd  none, 

Not  e'en  their  semblance  ;  which  is  all  the  more 

Remarkable  indeed,  since  he  was  one, 
Who,  once  upon  a  time,  "  bred  sic  a  splore" 

About  a  certain  youth,  or  stripling  son, 

Who  slipped  his  mother's  apron  strings  before 

He  should  have  done,  and  broke  a  lady's  heart, 

By  logic  arrows,  not  by  Cupid's  dart ! 


86 
xcm. 

The  case  was  one  that  got  into  the  books, 
Or  rather  one  on  which  some  books  were  made, 

That  caused  a  flutter  'mong  the  ancient  rooks 
Of  Yale,  beneath  whose  shades  the  scene  was  laid 

It  also  got  among  the  pastry-cooks, 
And  sundry  dames,  who  wagged  a  knowing  head, 

As  if  they  thought  the  subject  quite  too  tame, 

When  such  a  youth  inspired  "  Platonic  flame."  19 

xcrv. 

'  I'll  not  repeat  the  story  of  her  wrongs, 

(I  mean  the  maiden's,  blooming  six-and-thirty,) 

For  Beecher's  sister  once  took  up  the  tongs, 
Or  red-hot  poker,  at  the  trick  so  dirty, 

And  laid  it  on  the  youth,  with  added  thongs  ; 
In  other  words,  she  gave  the  stripling  "  putty," 

For  talking  so  divinely  to  a  lady, 

And  never,  to  her  notion,  getting  ready ! 

XCV. 

Vide  Miss  Beecher's  book,  entitled  "  Truth 
Stranger  than  Fiction,"  which  is  always  strange ; 

Especially  when  old  maids  write  of  youth, 
To  gratify  tracasserie,  or  revenge  ; 

And  dub  it  "fiction,"  though  it  have,  forsooth, 
Nor  plot,  nor  moral,  nor  a  single  change 

Of  incident  or  scene,  to  "  point  a  tale  ; — " 

Just  where  old  maids  proverbially  fail ! 


87 

XCVL 

I  crave  my  "  ancient  dames"  their  gentle  pardon  ; 
"  Lone  birds  of  Araby"  are  still  my  pets, 
If  not  the  Muse's,  which  should  not  be  hard  on 
The  "  Vestal  Order,"  with  its  chaste  videttes, 
Or  flying  sentinels,  to  guard  her  guerdon, — 

The  boon  a  lady  craves,  yet  never  gets ; 
I  mean  the  love  that  burns  without  ignition, 
And  saves  a  soul,  though  lost  in  sweet  perdition  ! 

XCVII. 

But,  as  I  said,  the  devil  had  his  ear, 
And  on  its  tympanum,  as  on  a  drum, 

Still  played  his  tattoo  ;  grinning  with  an  air 
Of  self-complacency  that  had  become 

A  dozen  Nesselrodes  in  one  affair, 

With  all  their  heads  together  on  one  "  hum.;" 

A  grin,  in  fact,  peculiar  to  the  devil, 

When  clerical  affairs  o'erride  the  civil. 

XCVIII. 

To  wit :  a  grin  that  grew  a  ghastly  smile, 

Then  a  sardonic  smirk — that  seemed  to  say, 
'  I've  got  you  in  my  clutches  with  your  bile, 
And  on  that  master  humor  mean  to  play, 

With  all  my  craft  and  subtlety  and  guile, 
Till  far  and  wide  its  ruin  I  survey  : 

A  humor  too  intense  and  fierce  to  sate, 

Like  hell-born  Hecate's  immortal  hate." 


XCIX. 

'  The  liver  is  the  lazaret  of  bile," 

Said  Byron  once,  in  a  too  bilious  state, 

When  all  the  critics  of  the  sea-girt  isle 
Denounced  his  muse  as  wholly  reprobate, 

And  held  him  up  as  doubly-damned  and  vile  ; 
Whilst  he  retorted  with  such  scorn  and  hate, 

And  dealt  about  him  such  poetic  fire, 

It  scathed  the  very  nations,  in  its  ire ! 


But  had  he  known  the  Puritanic  liver, 
Or  lazar-house  of  our  New  England  bile, 

His  daring  hand  had  snatched  Apollo's  quiver, 
And  plucked  the  Python  shaft  to  wing  the  while 

And  he  had  proved  as  mighty  to  deliver 
From  mental  peccancy  as  to  revile ; 

While  prouder  games  than  Pythian  had  been  sung, 

In  honor  of  his  deeds,  the  world  among. 

Cl. 

But  Byron  lived  too  early,  or  else  died 
Before  his  "opportunity,"  which  may 

Account  for  his  punctilio  when  denied 
A  place  among  the  poets  of  his  day ; 

For  genius,  to  no  proper  theme  allied, 

Disdains  to  soar,  though  honor  point  the  way, 

And  dazzling  halos  cluster  round  the  sun, 

As  types  and  symbols  of  what  may  be  won  ! 


OIL 

Had  he  but  lived,  he  had  expressed  no  want 

For  hero  to  his  mad  heroic  story  ; 
Especially,  if  in  the  fields  of  cant 

His  path  had  lain,  instead  of  fields  of  glory ; 
Our  parson  of  the  •'  high-church-militant," 

With  musty  whimwhams  and  an  aspect  hoary, 
Had  furnished  him  the  very  theme  he  wanted 
For  special  canto,  in  which  cant  is  canted  ! 

CIIL 

And  then,  I  fancy,  he  had  bravely  twined 
About  the  parson's  brow  some  special  bays, 

Such  as  Bob  Southey  happened  once  to  find 
About  his  own — the  shrimp  of  all  his  race; 

Or  "  poets  of  the  Lake,"  who  thought  to  bind 
All  laurels  to  their  brows,  by  special  grace ; 

But  Byron  dished  them  up,  with  seasoning  high, 

As  "  four  and  twenty  blackbirds  in  a  pie ;" 

CIV. 

And  sat  them  daintily  before  the  king, 

Whose  praises  they  had  warbled  in  their  nest, 

As  well  as  when  they  ventured  to  take  wing, 
And  did,  as  they  supposed,  their  "  level  best ;" 

The  satire  was  complete  without  its  sting, 
And  yet  it  rankled  in  poor  Southey's  breast 

So  keenly,  that  he  damned  the  very  name 

Of  "  Lake"  thereafter,  with  his  own  damn'd  fame ! 


90 
cv. 

But  I  digress.     The  devil,  and  not  Byron, 
Now  had  the  parson's  ear,  and  on  it  played 

As  if  his  tympanum  were  made  of  iron, 

And,  through  it,  conscience  was  to  be  essayed : 

A  thing  the  devil  always  keeps  an  eye  on 
As  "  contraband"  in  parsons,  as  in  trade  ; 

And  as  he  played  his  tattoo,  on  his  face 

The  grin  he  wore,  grew  to  a  grim  grimace. 

CVI. 

In  other  words,  the  devil  "grinned  sardonically," 
(The  phrase  is  Milton's,  and  'tis  very  clear 

The  Epic  Builder  used  it  not  ironically, 
But  rather  in  a  sense  he  deemed  severe 

And  rigidly  exact,  though  still  euphonically,) 
Or  grinned  as  if  he'd  got  the  very  ear 

He  wanted,  of  all  others  in  the  nation, 

For  special  purposes  of  titillation  ! 

CVH. 

And  on  it  played,  as  I  have  said  before, 
Or  tried  to  say  a  dozen  times,  I  think, 

And  every  time  my  muse  has  stumbled  o'er 
A  metaphor  or  two,  and  broke  a  link 

In  the  great  epic  chain  I  had  in  store ; 

Or  thought  to  have,  by  working  on  the  brink, 

Or  perilous  edge,  of  narrative,  to  show 

What  daring  heights  one's  muse  may  venture  to. 


91 

CVIII. 

But  now  the  devil  had  the  parson's  ear  ; 

Still  sitting  by  it,  squat  as  any  toad, 
And  quite  as  venemous  in  mien  and  air  ; 

With  eyes  that  glistened  like  a  snake's,  and  showed 
A  deadlier  purpose  in  their  venom  far ; 

While,  on  the  sleeper's  tympanum  he  trode 
With  legs  of  spiders  and  tarantulas, 
As  if  to  show  him  what  his  nature  was. 

CIX. 

Or  by  a  psychologic  law,  to  bring 

The  soul  in  judgment  to  its  own  fixed  seat ; 

Where  troops  of  perjured  witnesses  may  fling 
Their  subornation  at  his  very  feet, 

And  rail  at  conscience,  with  her  blunted  sting, 
As  at  a  painted  drab  along  the  street ; 

And  yet,  where  all  within  is  still  as  death, 

With  hushed  lips  parted  by  a  scarce  drawn  breath. 

CX. 

In  the  mysterious  chambers  of  this  court, 

I  see  the  soul  stand  like  a  culprit  fay, 
Self-gyved,  and  manacled,  and  made  the  sport 

Of  its  own  phantoms,  dim  and  shadowy  : — 
A  misty  troop  of  revelers  that  resort 

To  such  incongruous  mirth  and  levity, 
That  the  affrighted  soul  starts  back  with  dread, 
As  at  some  ghastly  concourse  of  the  dead. 


CXI. 

But  still  the  devil  titillates  his  ear, 

With  such  adroitness  as  to  bring  in  play 

Alternately  some  idle  hope  and  fear, 

That  chase  each  other  in  their  turn  away, 

Like  devil's  darning-needles  in  the  air, 

That  play  their  zigzag  freaks  at  close  of  day  ; 

Reminding  one  of  how  the  devil  stitches 

His  worldly  rents  up,  in  a  parson's  breeches  ! 

CXII. 

Which  he  now  does  in  such  a  clever  way, 
And  with  such  double  and  back-handed  stitches, 

That  scarce  a  parson's  found,  in  our  day, 

Who  does  not  boast  some  patches  to  his  breeches, 

Of  party-color,  devil-mixed,  or  gray, 

Sewed  on  by  this  half-tailor — to  show  which  is,  20 

And  which  is  not,  by  devil  deemed  below, 

The  proper  church  where  knaves  and  fools  should  go. 

CXIII. 

This  last  verse  ambles ;  but  'tis  not  the  fault 

Of  the  high-mettled  Pegasus  I  found 
Once  on  a  time,  in  the  far  west,  and  caught 

By  a  chance  lasso,  thrown  his  neck  around ; 
I've  never  tamed  the  animal,  nor  brought 

His  neck  to  know  its  rider ;  but  I've  found 
Him  ever  ready  for  a  "brush"  with  those, 
Who  would  dispute  the  classic  hoof  he  throws. 


93 

CXIV. 

I  know  his  strength,  his  grace,  his  beauty ;  I 
Know,  besides,  his  weakness ;  in  fact,  I  know 

All  that  he  has  been  to  the  world  and  me  ; 
He's  lost  some  opportunities  to  show 

His  weight  of  mettle— bottom,  as  they  say, — 
In  the  great  Derby  race  of  Life  below  ; 

But  then,  he  was  not  trained  for  height  of  speed, 

But  rather,  for  his  quality  of  feed  ! 

CXY. 

And  this  is  no  mean  training,  when  you  come 
To  measure  life  by  what  a  life  should  be ; 

A  goal  that's  reached,  implies  a  race  that's  run, 
And  honors  grasped,  time  idly  thrown  away  ; 

The  fool  that  babbles  most,  is  soonest  dumb, 
While  he  who  says  the  least,  has  mostjjsay  : — 

It  is  a  law  of  nature  that  all  growth 

Not  imperceptible,  is  little  worth. 

CXVI. 

Mark  how  the  mushroom  springs  from  swift  decay ; 

How  rankest  weeds  upgrow  about  some  spring, 
Whose  dark  and  turbid  waters  seek  the  day ; 

How  flits  the  insect  on  its  filmy  wing, 
And  basks  its  little  hour  of  life  away 

In  the  crisp  sunshine — momentary  thing ; 
Then  mark  the  oak.  with  gnarled  trunk  and  limbs, 
And  Jove's  proud  bird,  as  up  to  heaven  he  climbs ! 


94 


CXVII. 

These  are  examples  of  the  law  of  growth, 
That  teach  us  lessons,  if  we  will  but  learn, 

Of  some  intrinsic  excellence  and  worth  ; 
What  schoolmen  know,  or  may  in  sooth  discern, 

"With  their  cognitions,  and  contempt  of  truth 
That  does  not  on  some  logic  pivot  turn, 

You  may  yet  learn  yourself,  from  such  experience 

Of  men  and  things  as  I  have  had  to  query  hence  ! 

CXVIII. 

There  is  a  learning  that  is  styled  scholastic, 

Drawn  from  the  subtleties,  so  called,  of  schools  ; 

And  there  are  those  who're  quite  enthusiastic 
In  admiration  of  such  learned  fools  ; 

In  their  impressions,  whimsical,  fantastic, 
And  ever  ready  to  be  counted  gulls ; 

But  I  have  learned  that  mental  subtleties 

Mean  simply  this  — to  count  the  steps  of  fleas  f  2l 

CXIX. 

What  the  soul  craves  is  utterance  of  itself — 
An  outward  sunburst  of  its  inner  light ; 

It  longs  to  see  itself  in  bas-relief — 

In  breathing  marble,  speaking  from  the  height 

Of  some  grand  temple  to  the  gods  in  chief; 
And  claiming  for  itself  diviner  right, 

Than  to  sit  down  in  metaphysic  chair, 

And  split  the  ninth  part  of  some  splintered  hair ! 


95 
cxx. 

To  prop  foundations,  poise  the  lofty  dome, 
Erect  the  shaft  and  spring  the  arch  on  high  ; 

To  give  the  huge  and  massive  pile,  though  dumb, 
A  voice  to  speak  the  distant  century, 

And  summon  back  the  ages  from  the  tomb  ; 
These  are  the  soul's  accepted  destiny — 

Its  struggle  and  its  longing ;  not  to  hide 

Itself  away,  like  mole  beneath  the  glebe. 

CXXI. 

But  to  return.     The  parson  and  the  devil 
Still  hug  the  pillow  cozily  together, 

Just  as  I  left  them,  in  my  fancy's  revel, 
And  shot  off  in  a  tangent  on  the  weather, 

Or  on  some  zigzag  theme,  or  passing  cavil ; 
I'm  not  now  certain  which  it  was,  or  whether 

I  shot  at  all ; — I  only  know  I  meant  to, 

Without  much  caring  where  the  d — 1 1  went  to ! 

CXXII. 

For  I  was  anxious  to  kill  off  my  hero, 

(I  mean  Asmodeus,  not  the  parson  hoary,) 

Before  my  muse  should  tumble  down  to  zero, 
Or  lose  the  thread  essential  to  my  story  ; 

But,  as  the  devil  had  the  ear  of  Nero, 
And  titillated  it  with  dreams  of  glory 

When  Rome  was  one  wild  sea  of  dancing  flame, 

And  set  him  fiddling  to  achieve  the  same, 


96 

CXXIII. 

So  now  he  had  the  parson's,  with  the  same 

Brisk  titillation  for  his  tympanum  ; 
Enkindling  in  his  breast  the  maddened  flame 

That  fired  the  fiddling  mountebank  of  Rome,  22 
And  gave  to  Eratosthenes  the  name 

Of  the  mad  fool  that  fired  the  Ephesian  dome ; 
In  other  words,  he  lashed  the  parson's  brain 
Into  a  perfect  passion  for  men  slain, 

CXXIV. 

And  those  his  countrymen — slain  heaps  on  heaps, 
As  Samson  slew  Philistia's  hosts  one  day, 

With  the  jaw-bone  of  an  old  ass  that  sleeps 
Hard  by  the  scene  of  that  immortal  fray  ; 

Or  did  sleep  there,  when  Samson  turned  his  steps 
Towards  Dagon's  temple,  in  Philistia, 

And  swore  to  be  avenged,  for  his  lost  hair, 

On  all  his  wife's  relations  living  there  ! 

CXXV. 

And  so  he  was.    Perhaps  you've  read  the  story 

In  all  its  splendid  oriental  dress, 
Which  certain  modern  critics,  with  a  sorry 

Show  of  their  learning,  if  not  cleverness, 
Treat  as  a  myth ;  as  if  the  inventory 

Of  foxes'  tails  and  fire-brands,  were  less 
A  truth  of  history  than  that  other  tale, 
Which  treats  of  Jonah's  sea-voyage  in  a  whale  ! 


97 

CXXVI. 

I  hate  the  carper ;  scorn,  detest,  despise, 
And  hold  in  utter  loathing  all  his  race ; 

Who  from  the  soul  would  pluck  the  starry  eyes 
Of  faith  and  hope,  that  in  their  heavenward  gaze 

Eclipse  the  stellar  glory  of  the  skies, 

And  sweep  beyond  the  outmost  milky-ways — 

Or  paths  of  heaven  by  seraphs  wildly  trod — 

Up  to  the  throne  and  monarchy  of  God  ! 

CXXVII. 

I  hate  the  carper ;  but  I  hate  no  less 
The  hypocrite,  who  lives  and  dies  a  slave 

To  this  world's  estimate  of  righteousness  ; 
And  fawns  upon  success  in  practiced  knave, 

Who  snatches  honor  from  some  damned  disgrace, 
And  wears  il  flauntingly  ;  as  if  to  brave 

Opinion  of  mankind,  no  matter  what 

It  be,  or  whether  he  be  damned  or  not ! 

CXXVIH. 

I  hate  the  carper ;  but  I  loathe,  abhor, 
Contemn,  abjure,  scorn,  curse,  and  doubly  damn 

The  pulpit  mountebank,  who  clamors  for 

The  wrath  of  heaven  to  smite  his  fellow  man ; 

Who  does  not  pray,  or  gulp  some  dogma,  or 

Bestride  some  hobby,  or  "go"  some  whim-wham, 

According  to  his  notion;  as  if  he 

Were  theocratic  lord  of  earth  and  sea. 


98 

CXXIX. 

I  hate  the  carper ;  but  I'd  rather  be 

A  thousand  times  such  carper  than  such  knave, 
With  all  the  honors  that  theology 

Could  heap  on  me  ;  and  honors  she  may  have 
That  I  might  covet  with  avidity, 

Were  I  in  mood  to  do  so,  or  to  crave 
The  slightest  honor  that  adorns  these  days, 
When  to  be  damned,  one  needs  but  faintest  praise. 

CXXX. 

But  to  resume.  Asmodeus  plies  his  skill 

At  titillation  till  his  work  is  done, 
Or  till  the  dreamer's  face  betrays  a  smile 

At  sight  of  Death,  blood-drunk  upon  his  throne  ; 
With  thousands  madly  rushing  in  to  fill 

His  audience  chamber,  where  he  sits  alone 
In  grim,  majestic,  awful  state  and  mood, 
As  if  to  ape  the  presence  of  a  god  ; 

CXXXI. 

And  there  "  grins  horrible  a  ghastly  smile," 
To  find  his  famine  glutted,  and  his  maw 

Relieved  at  length  by  Puritanic  bile, 
That,  Shylock-like,  seeks  warrant  in  the  law, 

Or  "  bond  denominate,"  for  blood  to  spill ; 
With  just  enough  of  conscience  left  to  gnaw 

At  certain  vital  points  Religion  hath 

Reserved  for  little  souls,  to  cloud  their  faith. 


99 

CXXXII. 

Asmodeus  marks  the  dreamer's  face  and  grin, 
And  knows  his  task  is  ended.     He  has  played 

Upon  his  tympanum  till  all  within 

Is  tempered  to  his  liking,  with  no  shade 

Of  doubt  or  fear,  or  anything  akin 
To  them  or  either,  outwardly  displayed  : — 

And  so  he  vanishes  the  key-hole  through, 

Just  as  the  day-spring  deepens  into  view. 

cxxxm. 

But  this  precaution  takes,  to  sprinkle  o'er 
The  sleeper's  mind,  as  on  his  couch  he  lies, 

Some  titillating  dust  of  hellebore, 
The  better  to  control  his  faculties, 

And  keep  them  with  the  devil  en  rapport; 
For  well  he  knows  that  once  to  narcotize 

The  soul  with  deadly  night  shade,  from  that  hour 

It  parts  with  all  resistance  to  his  power. 

CXXXIV. 

Here  ends  my  second  canto.     It  is  longer 
Than  I  intended  on  the  start  to  make  it, 

But  it  has  grown  in  length  as  maid  grows  younger 
At  six-and-thirty — chastely,  as  I  take  it ; 

Though  not  more  spiteful  than  her  gentle  tongue,  or 
Disposition,  with  her  snowy  neck  hit 

OS  as  "  scrawny"  by  some  thoughtless  lover, 

Who  thinks  her  "plump  as  any  snipe  or  plover." 


100 

cxxxv. 

But  ere  I  turn  my  jaded  Pegasus 

Out  on  the  wayside  for  his  wisp  of  clover, 

Such  as  the  bees  sip  lovingly,  or  pass, 
When  too  much  sipped  already,  to  discover 

Some  virgin  blossoms  in  the  fragrant  grass, 
With  nectared  sweets  all  capped  and  hymened  over ; 

I  say,  before  I  do  this,  I  would  make 

A  single  dash  at  pulpit  mountebank. 

CXXXVL 

Proud  as  a  Cappadocian  horse  is  he 

Of  his  great  learning,  (just  enough  to  quote,) 

But  prouder  of  his  "  lost  virginity 
Of  oratory,"  which  he  gets  by  rote  ; 

Bringing  his  Ciceronian  powers  in  play, 
Not  to  save  souls,  but  to  get  men  to  vote : 

A  "  loyal"  ballot  being  more  essential, 

To  build  a  church  up,  than  a  soul-credential. 

CXXXYII. 

For  ballots  now-a-days  are  the  sole  test 
Of  piety — but  not,  thank  God  !  of  brains, — 

And  are  to  all  the  churches  what  "  Saints'  Rest" 
And  "Baxter's  Call"  are  to  the  sinner's  stains ; 

They  wipe  out  all  rascality  when  cast 
Into  the  party  scales  the  Church  maintains, 

And  prove  the  fact  that  "  suffrage, "  not  religion, 

Reclaims  a  soul  in  this  enlightened  region. 


101 

CXXXVIII. 

I  mean  the  grand  illuminating  focus, 
Or  center  of  all  "  blue  light,"  in  the  land ; 

Famed  for  its  whim-whams,  mental  hocus-pocus, 
And  humbug  notions  into  numsculls  crammed  ; 

Where  parsons  in  the  pulpit  learn  to  joke  us 
The  stalest  kind  of  jokes  at  their  command, 

And  every  little  upstart  of  a  preacher 

Attempts  to  ape  some  mountebank  or  Beecher. 

CXXXIX. 

One  of  this  stamp  I've  noted  with  some  pains, 
Whose  history  shows  how  far  a  little  brass 

Will  carry  a  small  quantity  of  brains ; 
Especially  in  the  pulpit,  where  one  has 

A  clean  thing  on  his  audience,  with  the  reins 
And  lash  in  his  own  hands,  to  use  them  as 

He  chooses, — on  some  fool,  or  knave,  or  brother. 

Just  as  he  happens  to  cull  one  from  t'other! 

CXL. 

He  preaches  not  a  thousand  miles  away 
From  two  great  thoroughfares ;  the  one,  a  street 

Where  fashion's  butterflies  disport  the  day 
In  all  their  glory — Sundays  most  complete ; 

The  other,  where  the  iron  horses  neigh 
And  champ  impatiently  the  fiery  bit, 

Till  like  Job's  war-steeds  they  cry  out  "  Ha !  ha !" 

Then  smoke  along  the  plain  with  thundering  car : 


102 

CXLI. 

And  is  the  jest  of  all  the  wags  a-street, 
Who  fling  their  jibes  at  ministerial  air 

And  pomp  and  vanity,  as  is  most  meet 
For  wags  to  do.    For  the  lex  tal.  is  fair, 

And  what  the  pulpit  gives  them  it  should  get; 
Especially,  since  peccadilloes  are 

Its  daily  foible,  with  not  half  as  much 

Of  mm.  con.  and  scan  mag.  in  State  as  Church  ! 

OXLII. 

No  wonder  that  the  wags  this  edict  hurled 
Once  on  a  time  against  a  certain  church, 

Whose  "loyalty"  and  virtue  were  unfurled 
In  banners  on  the  outer  walls  as  such  : — 
"  No  one  admitted  back  into  the  world, 

Whose  sins  you  do  not  father  quite  as  much 

As  you  did  all  his  virtues  when  you  took  him, 

And  we,  with  our  moralities,  forseok  him  !" 

CXLIII. 

But  here  we  throw  the  rein,  and  with  it,  too, 
The  mantle  of  our  charity.     We  have  been 

Upon  a  break-neck  nag  this  canto  through, 
With  little  thought  perhaps  to  rein  him  in, 

Save  at  a  venture,  when  some  line  or  two 
Struck  us  as  outre,  or  to  limp  akin ; 

And  then  we  only  drjfw  the  rein  enough 

To  make  him  plant  a  firmer,  steadier  hoof. 


103 


CXLIV. 

We  throw  the  rein,  and  with  it  also  throw 

A  mantle  wide  of  charity  o'er  deeds 
That  few  so  base  as  openly  avow, 

Though  many  seek  to  compass,  as  who  reads 
The  future  history  of  our  strife  shall  know ; 

Truth  crushed  to  earth  plants  deep  its  living  seeds, 
And  always  thrives  the  best  on  trampled  soil, 
Where  giant  wrong  hath  been  to  wring  the  spoil. 

CXLV. 

We  throw  the  rein,  and  this  our  precept  too : — 
Truth  crushed  to  earth  shall  heavenward  rise  again, 

Like  wayside  flowers  that  lift  their  heads  aglow 
With  a  far  sweeter  fragrance  when  they've  been 

All  rudely  trampled  on  by  passing  foe, 

Than  when  in  Flora's  gentle  arms  they've  lain 

The  long  night  through,  and  wake  at  early  dawn 

To  greet  Aurora,  jeweled-Queen  of  Morn  ! 


CANTO  THE  THIRD. 


Oh  thou,  Hesperia  !  thou,  my  native  land ! 

How  burns  my  soul  to  wipe  thy  tears  away, 
And  bathe  thy  starry  forehead  with  the  hand 

That  shall  thy  griefs  assuage,  thy  fears  allay  ! 
Accursed  forever  be  the  traitor  hand 

Upraised  against  thy  life,  free-born  Hesperia  ! 
Perdition  on  their  souls  whose  impious  breath 
Breathed  the  foul  lie  that  thou  wert  leagued  with  death 

II. 

And  worse  than  swift  perdition  be  the  curse 
That  lights  upon  their  souls,  who  dared  decry 

Thy  starry  emblem  in  their  drunken  verse, 

And  bid  the  world  "  tear  down  the  flaunting  lie ;"  l 

And  curses  deep  and  loud  and  long  and  worse 
Than  ever  leapt  from  tongue  of  mortal,  be 

Upon  their  heads,  the  foul  and  leprous  knaves, 

Who,  "  standing  on  two  hundred  thousand  graves," 


106 

ni. 

Swear  that  "  the  Union,  as  it  was,  shall  die ;" 
And  that  the  august  name  of  "Washington 

Shall  be  struck  down  as  one  of  infamy — 
No  more  to  blacken  history.    Oh,  for  one 

Eternal,  blighting  curse  to  blast  their  lie  ! 
And  oh,  Hesperia !  brightest  star  that  shone 

From  out  the  Western  sky,  come  forth  again, 

And  in  thy  glory  hide  their  damning  shame ! 

IY. 

This  invocation  is  upraised  to  thee, 

Oh  thou,  my  country  !  with  the  fervent  prayer 
That  heaven  may  yet  vouchsafe  thee  unity, 

And  peace,  and  concord,  reigning  everywhere 
In  all  thy  borders,  widespread  as  the  sea  ; 

With  strife  and  jar,  and  tumult  and  wild  war, 
Hushed  like  the  angry  waves  that  cease  and  die, 
When  the  fierce  storms  that  give  them  life  pass  by. 

V. 

We  left  the  Peri  with  the  guardian  seraph 

Of  that  abscinded  church,  wherein  was  preached 

Peace  and  good-will  to  men— two  things  whereof 
'Twas  treason  doubly-damned  and  foully  reached 

For  one  to  utter ;  as,  with  proper  share  of 

Our  "  patent  loyalty,"  none  could  have  stretched  2 

Opinion  less,  nor  further,  for  that  matter, 

And  so  there  rose  a  devil  of  a  clatter 


107 


VI. 

About  the  church's  ears,  as  I  have  stated. 

I've  told  you  how  Saint  Peter  was  affected 
By  it,  as  on  his  tympanum  it  grated 

Harshly  as  thunder,  with  its  bolt  ejected 
From  cloud  to  earth,  or  spit  from  perforated 

Mountain  top,  that  darkly  stands  erected 
Against  the  sky,  into  the  very  face 
Of  heaven,  which  thunders  back  in  wrath  apace. 

VII. 

I've  told  you  also  how  the  devil  chuckled, 
High  in  his  sleeve,  to  see  the  dismal  farce 

Played  by  ecclesiastics,  when  they  buckled 

Their  swords  a-thigh,  and  stalked  a-field  apace ; 

All  swearing  that  their  patriot  sires  had  truckled 
To  the  'slave  power,"  to  their  damned  disgrace, 

When  they  upreared  the  pillars  of  the  state 

For  their  race  only,  and  then  smashed  the  slate  !  3 

VIII. 

They  periled  not  their  fortunes,  honor,  lives, 
As  heroes  should,  but  as  base  hirelings  do, 

Who  fight  for  country,  kindred,  home,  and  wives, 
And — devil  take  the  hindmost  Kickapoo  ! 

Oblivious  of  the  fact  that  Freedom  gives 
More  honor  in  bestowal  upon  two, 

Unable  to  achieve  it,  than  on  ten 

Right  stalwart  arms  that  break  the  tyrant's  chain  ! 


108 


God  knows  I  venerate  our  patriot  sires, 
And  hold  in  awe  their  consecrated  dust ; 

But  then,  this  dastard  act  and  crime  of  theirs, 
Of  striking  for  their  country's  altars  first, 

And  last,  and  foremost,  whilst  they  quenched  the  fires 
Of  Liberty  in  Utopia,  calls  for  just 

Such  censure  as  they  get,  by  tongue  and  pen, 

From  the  whole  tribe  of  atrabilious  men. 


And  such  a  tribe  !  The  triple-headed  dogs 
Of  Plato,  guarding  fast  the  gates  of  hell ; 

The  mad  Centauri,  in  Thessalian  bogs,  * 
Foully  engendering,  by  some  double  spell, 

With  man  and  beast ;  the  herd  of  swine  or  hogs 
That  down  a  certain  steep  place  ran  pell-mell 

Into  the  sea — the  devil  in  them  all, — 

Are  but  the  types  and  symbols  they  recall. 

XI. 

But  I  digress.    What  right  have  Pluto's  dogs, 
Or  other  barking  curs,  to  have  their  day 

In  this  brief  canto,  while  the  Peri  jogs 
The  Muse's  elbow  for  a  grand  display 

Of  re-ascending  rapture,  with  all  clogs 
To  the  imagination  brushed  away, 

As  one  would  brush  the  sheerest  cobwebs  by, 

With  his  rapt  vision  piercing  earth  and  sky. 


109 

XII. 

The  Peri's  errand  from  the  skies  ;s  done ; 

Her  mission  ended ;  and  the  record  sought, 
Obtained,  and  ready  to  be  heavenward  borne ; 

While  in  her  breast  the  sweet  seraphic  thought 
Of  entrance  into  rest  again,  is  one 

That  lifts  her  up,  as  mountain  mists  are  caught 
And  held  mid-air,  in  circling  rifts  of  snow, 
By  the  pale  moonlight,  glinting  far  below. 

XIII. 

And  now  on  wings  as  motionless  as  air, 

And  as  invisible  to  mortal  sense, 
The  Peri  takes  her  flight,  keen-glancing  far 

Into  immensity,  as  seeking  thence 
Some  long-lost  pharo  in  a  distant  star, 

To  guide  her  upward  through  the  void  immense 
If  void  it  may  be  called  that  doth  include 
All  things  within  itself — Infinitude  ! 

XIV. 

I  see  her  still  on  rapid  pinions  glide 
Into  the  crystal  depths  of  upper  air, 

As  if  the  starry  mansions  opened  wide 

Their  glittering  portals  to  receive  her  there ; 

Or  she  were  upward  borne  on  rushing  tide, 
Or  some  magnetic  wave  that  swept  afar 

Its  jeweled  crest,  as  if  to  lave  the  bars 

Of  golden  light  that  trickled  from  the  stars ! 


110 

xv. 

I  see  her  still  upborne  into  the  sky, 
As  one  oft  sees  a  dazzling  object  fled, 

Long  after  it  has  faded  from  the  eye 

Of  outward  sense,  whereon  its  image  played ; 

Or  as  one  sees  the  sun  for  hours  gone  by, 
When  his  fierce  beam  upon  the  eye  has  shed 

The  glory  of  his  lustre,  blinding  sight 

By  sheer  excess  and  ecstacy  of  light. 

XVI. 

Skirting  awhile  the  fleecy  zone  that  lies 

Midway  'twixt  earth  and  heaven,  and  is  the  path 

That  seraphs  climb  in  rapture  to  the  skies, 
She  seems  a  starry  embryon  that  hath 

For  the  first  time  revealed  to  mortal  eyes 
Its  timid  light,  trembling  as  if  some  scath, 

Or  sinful  taint,  might  come  upon  its  ray, 

Shot  from  its  pale  orb  in  the  Milky-way. 

XVII. 

And  now  no  longer  down  the  steep  of  heaven 
Her  penciled  ray  is  shed,  but  with  strong  wing 

Well  practiced  in  such  flight  when  upward  given, 
She  makes  Astrsea's  bounds,  whose  crystal  spring 

Drips  golden  light  at  dawn  as  well  as  even ; 
Giving  the  dappled  East  its  coloring, 

And  the  effulgent  West  its  parting  glow, 

As  rubies  blush  on  necks  of  driven  snow. 


Ill 

XVIII. 

Saint  Peter  wept  at  the  celestial  gate, 

Or  rather  had  been  weeping  there  till  now, 

When,  thinking  of  the  Peri's  lost  estate 
And  the  long  penance  she  had  still  to  do, 

He  caught  a  glimpse,  far  down  the  glittering  height, 
Of  seraph  pinions  flashing  into  view ; 

And  wondered  whence  she  came,  the  wanderer  there, 

From  what  lost  world  or  madly-fallen  star. 

XIX. 

But  she  ascends  with  thought-outrunning  speed, 
Cleaving  the  pathless  ether  in  her  flight, 

As  lightning  cleaves  the  cloud  with  winged  steed, 
Or  rather  rives  it,  with  a  shaft  of  light ; 

Still  flashing  upward  swift  as  arrow  sped 
At  the  fierce  Python  by  Apollo's  might, 

Or  swift  as  shaft  sprung  from  Diana's  bow 

When  on  Mount  Athos  she  pursues  the  roe. 

XX. 

Her  flight  continues.     Seraphs  heavenly  fair 
Await  her  coming  at  the  gates  of  light, 

And  wing  her  welcomes  as  she  wings  the  air 
In  her  ecstatic,  heaven-regaining  flight ; 

And  as  she  nears  the  glittering  ramparts  there, 
A  thrill  of  rapture  runs  along  the  height, 

As  runs  a  spark  along  the  electric  chain, 

Whose  links,  long  parted,  meet  to  clasp  again. 


112 

XXL 

A  heaven  regained !     Well  might  a  seraph's  wing 
Have  flashed  the  glories  of  that  upper  sky 

As  did  the  Peri's,  on  her  entering 
The  gates  of  light,  thrown  wide  as  she  drew  nigh  ; 

Bearing  the  record  she  was  sent  to  bring, 
For  prompt  revision,  to  the  courts  on  high, — 

The  courts  of  last  resort,  where  giant  wrong 

And  priestly  domination  have  no  tongue  ; 

XXII. 

But  silent,  dumb,  confounded,  stand  aghast, 
As  stands  the  culprit  doomed  himself  to  die 

On  his  own  gallows,  Haman-like,  at  last, 
By  him  erected  to  the  heavens  high ; 

His  mask  stripped  off,  the  villain  thorough-paced 
Exposed,  and  made  the  jest  of  his  own  lie  ; 

While  through  his  soul  reverberates  the  curse, 

Thundered  from  a  dismantled  Universe ! 

XXIII. 

Saint  Peter  took  the  record,  glanced  it  over, 
Quite  hurriedly  at  first,  and  then  more  slowly  ; 

As  if  it  puzzled  him  to  guess  the  mover 

Of  so  much  craft,  among  the  "meek  and  lowly  ;" 

Unless  they  stood  in  need  of  springe  or  cover 
To  bait  the  devil's  woodcock,  and  could  so  lie 

In  wait  for  them,  that,  when  he  flushed  his  game, 

(I  mean  the  devil,)  they  might  bag  the  same ! 


113 


XXIV. 

This  stirred  Saint  Peter's  choler,  till  he  got 
As  mad  as  a  March  hare,  and  roundly  swore  5 

By  his  official  keys,  that  he  would  boot 
The  first  vile  Puritan  he  met  with,  or 

Be  instantly  unfrocked  upon  the  spot. 
"  I'm  not  placed  here,"  he  said,  "  as  janitor 

Of  this  establishment,  merely  to  be 

The  devil's  turn-key  to  hypocrisy  !" 

XXV. 

In  saying  this,  Saint  Peter  thought  to  say 
His  mind,  at  least,  which  needed  just  then  vent  ; 

For  whilst  he  spoke,  there  stalked  a  grim  array 
Of  Puritans  outside,  who  seemed  intent 

On  getting  into  heaven  their  own  way  ; 
And  who  on  earth  had  coarsely  daubed  the  saint 

After  the  Beecher  fashion,  that  is,  with 

A  firm  conviction  that  the  devil's  a  myth  !  6 

XXVI. 

They  came  up  boldly  and  demanded  entrance, 
As  if  they  owned  all  heaven,  in  fact,  in  fee, 

And  simply  had  dropped  round  to  get  their  quit-rents, 
And  ask  about  their  tenants'  "  loyalty  ;" 

Giving  instruction  to  have  promptly  sent  hence 
All  deputations  from  "  Secessia," 

And  sending  word,  as  notice  to  the  "  Governor," 

That  he  to  them  the  affairs  of  heaven  might  turn  over !  7 


114 


XXVII. 

Saint  Peter  stared  as  if  in  dumb  amazement, 
And  would  have  guessed  a  bedlam  fresh  let  loose, 

Had  he  not  known  what  such  a  moral  phase  meant, 
In  souls  like  theirs.    As  architects  oft  use 

Their  refuse  stuff  to  finish  up  a  basement, 
So  the  Great  Builder  of  the  Soul  doth  choose, 

In  fashioning  base  minds  to  their  true  spheres, 

To  take  the  odds  and  ends  of  all  ideas. 

XXVIII. 

And  minds  thus  fashioned  are  like  jangled  bells, 
Discordant,  harsh,  and  ever  out  of  tune  ; 

That  pierce  the  air  in  maddened  shrieks  and  yells 
Of  mirth  or  rage,  as  each  may  find  a  tongue  ; 

Or  else  lie  musicless  like  nroken  shells 

Along  the  surf,  where  the  mad -breakers  run, 

And  shake  their  deafening  clamors, — strewing  wide 

The  shattered  wrecks  they  make  on  every  side. 


And  here  Saint  Peter  called  on  Michael,  who, 
With  dauntless  pinion,  wings  the  nether  air 

As  well  as  upper,  instantly  to  go 
A.nd  summon  the  Apostles  to  repair 

At  once  to  heaven's  gate.    "  I've  got  a  clue," 
He  said,  "  to  what  the  devil's  up  to  there, 

With  his  'exparte  councils;'  and  I  guess 

I'll  block  his  game,  with  all  his  craftiness." 


115 

XXX. 

And  banding  the  archangel  his  warrant,  he 
Made  fast  the  gates  of  light  against  a  group 

Of  Puritans  outside ;  putting  the  key 
Into  his  pocket,  which  he  buttoned  up 

Just  in  the  nick  of  time ;  that  is  to  say, 
In  time  to  save  its  contents  from  a  troop 

Of  well-drilled  digits,  that,  deploying,  made 

Upon  his  pocket  an  incipient  raid. 

XXXI. 

The  Apostles  came,  Saint  Matthew  being  first, 
And  wearing  on  his  thigh  the  very  sword 

That  struck  him  down  a  martyr  in  the  dust 
Of  Ethiopia,  where  he  preached  the  word, 

Or  sought  to  preach  it,  to  the  great  disgust 
Of  bushmen  tribes,  whose  stolid  wit  preferred, 

To  broken  symbols  of  the  Church,  a  chine 

Or  two  of  good  jerked  missionary  loin  !  8 

XXXII. 

Saint  Mark  was  next,  the  meek  disciple  of 
Peter  himself,  who  greeted  his  old  friend 

And  master  with  such  warmth,  it  showed  the  love 
Of  earth  was  still  too  strong  in  him  to  end ; 

Though  some  assert  that  mutual  cares  above 
Dissolve  our  earthly  bonds,  and  make  us  mend 

Our  manners  as  our  morals  in  the  skies, 

Since  we  have  there  no  sublunary  ties. 


116 


XXXIII. 

And  then  Saint  Luke,  the  steady  friend  of  Paul, 
Because  he  was  converted  to  the  faith 

By  him  at  Antioch,  where  he  had  a  call 
As  chief  physician  against  mortal  scath, 

And  not  diseases  of  the  soul  at  all ; 
But  he  of  Tarsus  showed  another  path, 

Which  was,  to  pill  the  body,  on  the  whole, 

With  such  rare  pellets  as  to  save  the  soul. 

XXXIV. 

The  others  came  without  regard  to  order, 
Or  even  precedence,  save  John  and  Paul, 

Who  arm  in  arm  next  greeted  the  old  warder 
Of  heaven's  gate,  as  one  who  held  them  all 

In  his  official  keeping  and  strict  guard,  or 
Now  and  then  let  out  on  their  parole ; 

Which  last  he  always  did  at  such  odd  times 

As  they  grew  crotchety — to  air  their  whims  !  9 

XXXV. 

And  thus  convened,  Saint  Peter  held  discourse 
In  his  blunt  fashion,  rough  as  angular  : 

'  On  that  mad  ball  of  ours,  what  time  the  curse 
And  stain  of  sin  were  on  it  everywhere ; 

And  we  all  suffered  martyrdom,  or  worse, 
Had  our  faith  jeered  at  as  a  bald  affair ; 

A  fraud,  a  cheat,  a  sham  ;  and  where  our  sad  brows 

Had  nearly  sent  us  all  into  a  madhouse  ; 


117 


XXXVI. 

'  The  devil  roamed  at  large,  as  you  well  know, 
And  tried  his  hand  on  us  as  well  as  others ; 

But  we  so  managed  it  to  give  a  blow 
As  well  as  take,  and  thereby  spoil  his  feathers 

When  he  would  play  the  peacock  for  the  crow, 

Or  something  blacker ;  though  his  loosened  tethers, 

Or  length  of  chain,  gave  us  a  deal  of  trouble, 

While  gleaning  wheat  from  fields  of  human  stubble. 

XXXVII. 

"  I've  got  a  record  here,"  continued  he, 
"  Penned  by  the  only  seraph  left  on  earth, 
Which  shows  the  devil  up  to  deviltry 

Beyond  all  precedent,  since  the  undated  birth 
Of  those  foul  whelps  of  sin,  engendering  free 

With  the  gaunt  monster,  hideously  called  Death, 
Who  stalks  a  grisly  horror  still  athwart 
Man's  path  to  heaven,  and  brandishes  his  dart." 

XXXVIII. 

Saint  Simon  Zealot,  in  his  zealous  way, 
Snatched  up  the  document  and  read  it  first, 

Then  frowned  majestically,  that  is  so  say, 

Frowned  as  a  good  saint  should  at  things  accursed ; 

And  thus  exclaimed  :  "  Of  all  the  fiends  at  bay 
In  nether  pit,  there's  not  a  devil  that  durst 

Obtrude  his  guilty  head,  and  upward  hiss 

A  sentiment  to  heaven  as  vile  as  this." 


118 

XXXIX. 

And  Simon  read  :  "  Since  he  has  dared  to  preach 
And  pray  for  peace,  the  white-wing'd  messenger, 

We'll  plant  the  canons  of  our  church,  and  breach 
His  walls,  uncanonized  till  now ;  or  stir 

The  devil  up  to  do  for  us  as  much, 
And  open  on  him  with  a  coup  defer  ; 

This  upstart  orator,  that  dares  to  pray 

For  peace  on  earth  in  heaven's,  not  our  way  !"  ]  ° 

XL. 

•  What  jolly  sect  is  that  1"  inquired  Saint  Jude, 
Who  was  a  little  deaf,  but  still  could  hear 

Enough  to  relish  any  joke,  if  good : 
"  I  thought  the  fools  all  dead  and  knaves  all  here," 

(Casting  an  eye,  in  which  a  twinkle  showed, 
Upon  some  Puritans  that  still  stood  near,) 

'  And  earth  quite  free  from  all  such  human  '  sparrows' 

As  those  that  punctured  me  to  death  with  arrows  !" 

XLL 

Saint  James  the  Less  was  in  no  mood  for  mirth, 
And  thought  it  out  of  place  in  Jude  to  speak 

Thus  lightly  of  his  martyrdom  on  earth  ; 
He  was  himself  the  victim  of  mere  pique, 

Thrown  from  a  temple  and  then  mauled  to  death 
By  a  vile  fuller's  club  laid  on  his  back ; — 

The  meanest  kind  of  martyrdom,  he  thought, 

And  worse  than  Jude's,  for  he  was  only  shot, 


119 


XLTI. 

'  Pray,  do  not  wrangle,"  said  Bartholomew, 
"  About  the  manner  of  your  taking  off, 
'Twas  no  doubt  grievous  at  the  time,  and  drew 

Some  imprecations  from  you  that  were  tough  ; 
But  it  was  nothing  to  what  /went  through 

In  Lycaonia,  where  I  took  each  cuff 
And  kick  they  gave,  and  managed  to  forgive 
The  very  king  that  had  me  flayed  alive." 

XLIII. 

'Why,"  interposed  Saint  Andrew,  "is  this  boast?" 
To  lose  your  tegumentary  covering,  is 

No  doubt  a  great  calamity,  and  just 

The  one  you  should  avoid,  unless  your  lease 

Of  life  demands  that  you  give  up  the  ghost, 

And  part  with  all  your  earthly  dross  and  dress ; 

But  then  it  matters  little  what  you  wear 

On  earth,  if  you  have  proper  raiment  here." 

XUV. 

•  That's  true,"  said  John,  "  but  what  if  you  had  died 
At  banquet  feasting,  and  not  on  the  cross 

Fasting  and  praying,  as  you  nobly  did  ? 
Your  earth-life  had  been  counted  but  as  dross 

To  the  refined  gold  it  was  when  tried 

In  heaven's  alembic;  and  tbere'dbeen  abuzz, 

A  murmur  of  complaint,  throughout  the  skies, 

To  see  you  crowned  with  your  victorious  bays." 


120 


XLV. 

'  And  you,"  said  Thomas,  doubting  as  he  spoke, 

"  Were  boiled  in  oil,  I  think  you  said,  at  Rome, 
And  had  at  Ephesus  your  neck  nigh  broke 

By  certain  '  roughs'  that  deemed  you  troublesome  ; 
And  this,  according  to  your  notion,  took 

You  straight  to  heaven,  or  gave  the  right  to  come  ; 
I  doubt  if  this  be  good  theology, 
And  shall  look  in  my  text-books  just  to  see  !" 

XLVI. 

Saint  James  the  Great  could  scarce  restrain  a  smile, 
And  playfully  remarked  to  Phillip,  who 

Stood  silent  by,  though  much  amused  the  while ; 
"  I  wonder  what  our  doubting  friend  would  do, 

If  all  earth's  doubts  were  banished  to  some  isle, 
Sea-girt  and  lone,  like  Crusoe's  and  his  crew  ?" 

'  He'd  no  doubt  seek,"  said  Phillip,  "  some  rare  '  pet' 

Of  doubt,  and,  Crusoe-like,  turn  anchoret !" 

XL  VII. 

Saint  Paul,  with  that  high  dignity  and  grace 
Which  marked  his  earthly  bearing,  said  that  he, 

In  all  due  deference  to  the  time  and  place 
And  subject-matter  of  their  pleasantry, 

Must  call  his  friends  to  order ;  "  We  transgress 
That  higher  law,"  he  said,  "  of  courtesy, 

When  summoned  here  some  worldly  doubt  to  sift, 

To  cavalierly  turn  the  point  adrift." 


121 


XLVIII. 

And  then  proceeded  to  lay  bare  the  craft 
And  guile  of  those  who  got  up  their  ex  parte 

Or  "  loyal"  council,  more  intensely  chafed 
At  prayers  for  peace  and  Union  than  at  hearty 

Shouts  for  a  "  rebel"  victory,  telegraphed  1 1 
From  fields  of  slaughter  that  would  start  Astarte 

From  her  Sidonian  dreams  of  carnage  wild, 

With  trampled  thousands  scattered  o'er  the  field. 

XLIX. 

He'd  read  the  record  which  the  Peri  brought 

With  such  celerity  from  earth  below, 
And  thought  it  time  these  mundane  fools  were  taught 

To  mend  their  manners,  and  their  morals  too  ; 
Especially  the  clergy,  who  had  sought 

To  raise  the  devil  generally,  and  sow 
Seeds  of  dissension  where  they  should  have  sown 
Those  of  repentance  for  themselves  alone. 


And  further  held  that  earthly  councils  were 

So  subject  to  revision  in  the  skies, 
That  when  ex  parte  and  irregular, 

As  this  one  was,  a  certiorari  lies 
To  bring  the  record  up  where  they  might  square 

The  action  to  the  intent,  and  thus  devise 
Some  antidote,  or  prophylactic,  for 
The  hellish  passions  that  engender  war. 


122 

LI. 

The  Quaker-burners  and  witch-hangers  of 
Old  Plymouth  Rock,  were  on  another  dance 

Around  their  hell-broth  cauldron ;  to  approve 
Old  Praise-God-bare-bones'  love  of  hell  and  chance 

Two  pivots  in  his  faith  whereon  doth  move 
That  universal  "hub"  of  arrogance, 

Called  Boston, — the  cleverest  place  alive, 

For  atheistic  piety  to  thrive  !  1 2 

LII. 

A  city  that  is  dubbed,  par  excellence, 

The  "  Athens  of  America"  by  those 
Why  think  old  Gunny-bags  has  got  the  sense 

To  pay  for  praise,  rubbed  in  by  verse  and  prose  ; 
But  just  as  like  to  Athens  as  a  fence 

Is  to  a  hedgehog  in  a  classic  grove ; 
To  use  a  simile  of  contrariety, 
In  speaking  of  a  place  of  so  much  piety  ! 

Lin. 

It  boasts  its  Museums,  Lyceums,  Athensea, 
And  temples  to  the  gods,  like  those  of  Greece  ; 

Its  sages,  wise  men,  heroes  of  Plataea, 

And  Jason s  voyaging  for  the  golden  fleece ; 

Its  mysteries  of  Cybele  and  Rhea, 
And  Sybaritse  known  to  the  police  ; 

And  boasts,  besides,  its  doctors  of  divinity, 

Who,  with  the  devil,  war  against  the  Trinity. 


123 


LIV. 

It  also  boasts  its  famous  Blarney-stone, 

Or  Plymouth  Rock,  whereon  the  Pilgrims  landed 

What  time  the  dauntless  Pym  and  Hampden  shone 
Above  their  peers,  and  Justice,  even-handed, 

Weighed  her  decrees  against  the  kingly  throne, 
As  well  as  subject  when  with  treason  branded; 

That  is  to  say,  what  time  the  Puritan 

Grew  timely  valiant  and  from  danger  ran !  13 

LV. 

Hit  is  a  history  that's  to  be  writ, 
Not  written  as  we  say  of  fallen  Babel, 

That  anciently  was  Nimrod's  hunting-seat ; 
Where  Nebucadonoser  ('tis  no  fable) 

Once  turned  to  grazing  from  a  dearth  in  meat  ; 
And  Daniel  in  the  lions'  den  was  able 

To  shut  the  lions'  mouths  without  a  muzzle, 

Which  puzzled  King  Darius  to  unpuzzle  ! 

LVI. 

This  was  in  substance,  not  in  manner,  what 
Saint  Paul  alleged,  by  way  of  prelude  to 

His  grand  indictment,  against  those  who  thought 
To  gain  admittance  into  heaven  through 

Their  own  vile  deeds,  or  those  by  Satan  wrought ; 
There  being  little  difference  'twixt  the  two, 

Save  that  the  devil  gave  the  better  reason 

For  his  transcendent  perjury  and  treason ! 


124 


LVII. 

And  did  not  play  the  hypocrite  to  gain 

Such  angels  to  his  cause  as  thought  to  fight 

For  heaven's  supremacy  and  ancient  reign, 

And  then  strike  down  their  sacred  cause  and  right ; 

Nor  in  the  very  heat  of  battle  plain, 

When  thousands  had  gone  to  death  and  night, 

Turn  his  artillery  against  the  sky 

To  blot  the  stars  from  out  the  canopy. 

LVIII. 

Nor  bellow  "  treason"  against  such  as  strove 
To  save  the  skies  from  their  impending  wreck, 

When  angels  shot  their  spheres  like  stars  above, 
And  joined  the  devils'  grand  symposiac, 

Or  merry-making  council ;  to  approve 
War  waged  along  the  universal  track 

Of  heaven,  that  the  devil  might  have  his  day, 

And  found  an  empire  on  Equality  ! 

Lix. 

And  who  but  Satan,  who  but  only  he, 

E'er  sought  to  build  a  state  on  such  foundation  ! 

Where  every  race,  and  tribe,  and  Chimpanzee, 
And  chattering  monkey,  might,  by  mis'genatlon, 

Stand  in  the  scale  of  grand  equality, 

And  hold  an  equal  place,  and  rank,  and  station  ! 

Sure  none  but  he,  or  politician  scurvy, 

E'er  sought  to  turn  a  world  thus  topsy-turvy. 


125 


LX. 

But  to  resume.     Saint  Paul's  indictment  read, 
And  duly  pondered  in  their  august  state, 

Saint  Peter  was  directed  to  have  made 
A  summons  for  some  Puritans,  whose  hate 

And  want  of  charity  on  earth,  had  led 

Them  into  every  kind  of  broil  and  strait : 
"  Call  Roger  Williams,"  said  Saint  Paul,  "  or  rather, 

First  call  Ann  Hutchinson  and  Richard  Mather !  1 4 

LXI. 

The  female  shadow  came,  but  not  the  other; 

And  Michael,  who  had  served  the  summons,  swore, 
Or  made  return,  with  affidavit,  rather, 

That  he  had  searched  his  bailiwick  quite  o'er, 
And  could  not  find  a  solitary  Mather, 

Clergy  or  lay,  this  side  of  Pluto's  shore. 
"  They're  all  on  'tother  side,"  he   added,  "  which  is 
By  far  the  best  place  now  for  burning  witches  ! 

LXU. 

"  But  not  so  always,"  ventured  Ann,  the  shadow 

Of  Massachusetts'  heretic,  to  say ; 
•'  For  when  your  Puritanic  saint  is  mad,  or 

In  a  frenzy,  then  the  devil's  to  pay, 
As  from  my  own  experience,  once  had,  or 

Suffered  rather,  I  can  well  bewray  ; 
And  when  he  gets  an  over-pious  whim  in- 
To  his  head,  he  takes  to  hanging  women 


126 

LXIII. 

'  As  naturally  as  a  duck  to  water,  or 

A  crow  to  carrion,  or  a  hen  to  eggs 
When  the  first  fit  of  incubation's  on  her, 

And  she  instinctively  ties  up  her  legs. 
I  knew,  in  life,  your  reverend  Richard  Mather  ; 

He  preached,  in  Boston,  against  female  plagues, 
Who  did  not  wear  their  flipperjigs,  and  '  sew 
Pillows  to  all  armholes,'  as  most  women  do. 

LXIV. 

"  'Simplex  munditiis'  is  the  Horatian  rule ; 

I  followed  it,  or  tried  to,  when  on  earth ; 
But  every  Puritanic  priest  and  fool 

Cried  out  against  it  as  of  hellish  birth, 
And  swore  I  went  quite  nude  to  church  at,  Yule, 

Or  ancient  Christmas,  to  provoke  their  mirth, 
Or,  what  was  worse,  their  passions,  or  what  not, 
It  is  so  long  since  then  I  have  forgot." 

LXV. 

Meanwhile  Saint  Peter  looked  into  his  books 
To  see  what  Puritanic  names  he  had, 

And  seemed  quite  blank  and  puzzled  in  his  looks, 
To  find  that  none  as  yet  were  registered ; 

And  rummaged  further  into  sundry  nooks 

And  dog-eared  corners,  where  he'd  briefly  made 

Some  "  dead-head"  entries  once  upon  a  time, 

He  knew  not  from  what  motive,  or  what  whim, 


127 


LXVI. 

But  fancied  it  was  done  by  way  of  trial, 
To  see  how  awkwardly  a  ghost  would  stalk, 

That  played  the  saint  on  earth  without  denial 
Of  worldly  hates  and  passions ;  and  whose  walk 

And  conversation  led  to  every  vial 

Of  petty  wrath  a  Christian  could  uncork ; 

I  mean  a  Christian  after  the  straight  sect, 

Known  as  the  Pharisee,  or  the  "  elect." 

LXVII. 

'  The  case  is  awkward,"  said  Saint  Jude,  "  but  we 
Must  jfomehow  manage  to  secure  the  attendance 

Of  these  old  Puritans.     Perhaps  a  fee 

To  Charon  might  obtain  them,  but  to  send  thence 

Without  a  '  sop'  to  Cejerus,  would  be 
Entirely  futile.     Still  our  chief  dependence 

Is  on  the  swift- wing'd  Michael ;  let  him  go 

With  a  subpoena  to  the  shades  below." 

LXVIII. 

Michael  appearing,  promptly  took  the  order, 
And  downward  swooped,  like  eagle  for  his  prey, 

Nor  stayed  his  flight  till  he  had  reached  the  border 
Of  Lucifer's  dominions ;  where  they  lay 

Much  like  old  Massachusetts,  that  is,  broader 
Along  the  coast  than  inland  from  the  bay ; 

With  shoals,  and  quicksands,  and  a  treacherous  beach, 

And  "  blue  lights"  burning  to  entice  the  wretch. 


128 

LXIX. 

'Michael !"  inquired  the  Prince  of  Air,  "  why  here, 
Before  the  gate  of  him  you  dare  not  serve  ? 

Your  present  aspect  and  the  badge  you  wear, 
Bespeak  you  in  His  service  still  above ; 

But  what's  your  mission  to  these  fields  of  air, 
Where  I  hold  guard,  and  bodily  approve 

My  presence  and  my  power  ?    Hence,  depart ! 

Or  you'll  provoke  a  more  than  mortal  dart." 

LXX. 

'  Look  to  your  laurels  well  before  you  strike," 
Ketorted  Michael.    "  I  have  felt  your  power, 

As  you  have  mine ;  and  he's  a  lunatic, 

Or  worse  than  one,  who  would,  at  this  late  hour, 

Provoke  the  other  to  a  combat  like 

Our  last;  in  which,  you  must  allow,  I  bore 

An  equal  part  at  least,  and  saw  you  hurled 

Headlong  and  flaming  to  this  nether  world." 

LXXI. 

•'  But  by  whose  arms  ?  Not  yours,  though  bright  they  shine 
As  polished  steel  of  heavenly  temper  wrought; 

Nor  by  your  prowess,  which,  compared  with  mine, 
Were  like  gross  substance  to  the  living  thought 

That  shapes  the  universe  to  forms  akin 

To  its  own  essence.     Pray,  inform  me  what 

Has  brought  you  hither  in  such  high  hot  haste, 

Unless  you  seek  of  war  another  taste  1" 


129 


LXXII. 

I'll  frankly  tell  you,  with  your  boasts  aside, 

That  ill  become  you  in  your  present  state ; — 
Within  your  purgatorial  realms  abide, 

Some  sundry  souls  that  you  would  gladly  set 
At  liberty,  I  think,  since  they  deride 

Your  power,  and  hold  you  in  contempt  and  hate." 
"  What !  those  who  raised  the  devil  on  earth,  and  thought, 
When  they  got  here,  to  set  the  devil  at  naught  ?" 

LXXIII. 

"  Precisely  they — the  most  identical," 

Responded  Michael ;  "  and  my  mission  here, 

Is  to  relieve  you  of  their  charge  until 
An  Apostolic  council,  held  elsewhere, 

Shall  need  their  presence  to  correct  their  bile; 
Or  question  them  about  a  certain  sphere, 

Which  most  supplies  your  kingdom  here  below 

With  immigration,  as  the  figures  show." 

LXXIV. 

The  Prince  here  bowed,  and  with  a  gracious  smile, 
Exclaimed,  "  I'm  with  you  !     Prithee,  no  petition ; 

But  take  each  Puritanic  priest  and  vile, 
And  broken-down  old  hack  of  politician, 

And  purge  the  atrabilious  knaves  of  bile  ; 

'Twill  save  my  kingdom  from  its  next  sedition, 

And  save,  besides,  some  several  thousand  broils, 

And  quite  relieve  me  of  the  lust  of  spoils." 


130 


LXXV". 

He  then  relaxed  his  diabolic  brow, 
And  half  extended  to  his  ancient  friend 

A  kindly  greeting;  which  would  seem  to  show 
That  even  Satan  was  inclined  to  mend 

At  times  his  manners,  if  not  morals  too ; 
What  scarcely  can  be  said  of  priests  that  lend 

Themselves  to  politics,  for  then  their  hates 

Become  immortal  as  the  distafFd  Fates. 

LXXYI. 

Forth  from  the  gate  a  troop  of  souls  went  streaming 
Like  lurid  light  from  out  a  cloud  of  wrath, 

And  took  a  zigzag  course,  as  does  a  seam  in 
Some  mad  volcanic  mountain  that  is  loath 

To  belch  its  flames,  though  with  irruption  teeming, 
And  ploughing  down  its  sides  a  fiery  path ; 

While  supernatural  mutterings  fill  the  air, 

Like  smothered  shrieks  and  wailings  of  despair. 

LXXVIL 

Michael  was  startled  at  the  sight,  and  would 
Have  ventured  on  expostulation  ;  but 

Satan,  perceiving  what  his  thought  was,  showed 
It  quite  impossible  for  him  to  shut 

The  gate  upon  them,  pouring  in  such  flood, 
And  being  withal  a  desperate  rabble-rout : — 

'  You  need  not  be  alarmed,"  he  said,  "  this  crew 

Will  never  trouble  Saint  Peter,  nor  heaven,  nor  you. 


131 


LXXVIII. 

'  I've  learned  their  idiosyncracies,"  he  added, 
"  And  know  what  they  will  seek,  and  what  avoid ; 
Of  all  localities,  there  is  none  so  dreaded 

By  them  as  heaven,  where  peace  must  be  enjoyed 
As  a  condition  precedent.    The  way  they're  headed, 

I  think  they'll  bring  up  on  some  asteroid, 
Or  fragmentary  planet,  where  they  may 
Give  their  explosive  faculties  full  play ; 

LXXIX. 

'•'  And,  what's  essential  to  your  purpose,  be 
Within  your  jurisdiction ;  where  an  order, 

From  council  apostolical  or  lay, 

Will  promptly  reach  them ;  and  thus  save  the  warder 

Of  heaven's  gate  from  further  troubling  me 
With  summonses  to  bring  them  to  his  border ; 

Which  'tis  by  no  means  certain  I  should  do, 

Save  to  get  rid  of  such  a  motley  crew." 

LXXX. 

"  I  understand,"  said  Michael,  with  a  brow 

That  still  retained  its  fixed  serenity, 
And  kept  the  Devil  at  his  distance,  though 

There  lurked  beneath  his  looks  a  wish  to  be 
On  friendlier  terms  than  he  had  been  till  now ; — 

"  I  understand,"  he  said,  "  your  comity, 
But  not  your  hate  of  those  whose  earthly  spites 
Just  fit  them  for  the  sphere  of  bedlamites." 


132 


Their  parley  ended,  Michael  winged  his  way 
Back  to  celestial  bounds  ;  while  Satan  took 

A  circumspective  view,  or  wide  survey 
Of  his  dominions  ;  glancing  at  each  nook 

And  corner  of  his  realm,  to  see  if  they  — 
The  Puritanic  troop  —  had  really  struck 

For  other  climes,  as  he  had  hoped  they  might, 

Flaming  and  hissing  like  an  aerolite. 

LXXXII. 

A  keen  observer  of  the  human  face 

Satanic,  not  divine,  —  as  sometimes  rated,  — 

Might  have  discovered  in  his  looks  a  trace 
Of  satisfaction,  near  akin  related 

To  what  engenders  mostly  the  grimace  ; 
For  never  was  the  Devil  more  elated 

Than  when  he  found  his  purgatorial  realm 

Cleared  of  its  viscid  Puritanic  phlegm  ! 

LXXXin. 

But  speaking  of  an  aerolite,  how  like 
To  a  perturbed,  restless  soul  it  is  ; 

Wandering  the  pathless  void  in  lines  oblique, 
And  governed  by  no  law  but  sheer  caprice  ; 

Endeavoring,  like  a  pugilist,  to  strike 

At  every  orb  that  holds  its  course  in  peace, 

Or  madly  pitching  into  every  planet, 

That  with  impunity  it  thinks  it  can  hit. 


133 


LXXXIV. 

I -know  some  politicians  of  this  class, 

(Their  name  were  legion,  numbering  them  to-day,) 
Poor  brainless  aerolites  that  think  to  pass 

For  planets  in  their  orbs  ;  and  flame  away 
In  their  mad  course,  as  if  the  heavens  were  brass, 

And  earth  alone  illumined  by  their  ray  ; — 
They  now  and  then  explode,  and  sometimes  fall, 
Or  pass  for  "  cosmic  wonders,"  that  is  all ! 

LXXXV. 

The  council  was  in  session,  with  Saint  Paul 
Presiding,  whose  high  dignity  and  grace, 

Marked  him  the  noblest  Roman  of  them  all ; 
While  on  his  pale  and  ever-thoughtful  face, 

Deliberation  sat,  and  care  withal ; 
And  majesty  that  seemed  the  crowning  dress 

Of  his  nobility,  as  shown  on  earth, 

Not  in  his  priestly  robes,  but  royal  worth. 

LXXXVI. 

He  looked  a  very  king,  and  yet  was  chary 
Of  all  demeanor  that  proclaimed  him  such  ; 

And  though  his  mind  was  rich  as  any  quarry 
In  ancient  Pavaim  worked,  he  used  as  much 

The  thoughts  of  others  as  his  own  to  carry 
The  many  abstruse  points  he  sought  to  clutch  ; — 

In  fact,  his  modesty  and  greatness  ran 

Together,  like  two  streams  that  blend  in  one. 


134 

LXXXVII. 

He,  who  had  sat  at  rare  Gamaliel's  feet, 
And  drank  the  wisdom  of  the  Orient  in ; — 

All  that  was  known  of  abstract  and  concrete 
In  ancient  Tarsus,  through  the  ages  dim ; 

Where  learning  whilom  held  her  chosen  seat, 
And  Cydnus  flowed  from  rocky  Taurus'  chain ; 

Knew  all  that  appertained  to  priest  and  man, 

And  scorned  to  play  the  part  of  charlatan  ; 

LXXXVIII. 

And,  least  of  all,  the  knave  in  politics ; 

As  I  have  seen  the  clergy  of  our  day, 
In  pulpit  playing  their  "fantastic  tricks 

Before  high  heaven,"  and  men  as  vile  as  they 
Showing  themselves,  in  state-craft,  empirics, 

As  in  religion  and  church  polity  ; 
And  proving  beyond  question,  or  a  doubt, 
That  fools  and  bedlamites  were  both  let  out! 

LXXXIX. 

But  I  digress.    The  "  greatest  living  poet" 
Says  none  should  do  so  in  an  epic  strain ; 

But  he  and  Byron  differ,  so  I  trow  it 
Is  still  an  open  question  to  maintain 

Or  controvert,  as  one  may  wish  to  show  it, 
Who  fancies  he  can  strike  an  epic  vein, 

And  quarry  out  the  thoughts  of  living  sages, 

Or  dead  ones  that  lie  scattered  down  the  ages, 


135 


xc. 

Like  wrecks  of  over-freighted  argosies 
Along  the  "slimy  bottom  of  the  sea;" 

Where,  in  the  ghastly  sockets  of  men's  eyes, 
Sleep  gems  and  pearls,  as  if  in  mockery 

Of  the  once  living  thought  that  pierced  the  skies, 
And  claimed  companionship  with  deity  : — 

So  sleep  the  thoughts  of  dead  men  we  regain, 

By  plummet-sounding,  down  the  distant  main. 

XCL 

But,  as  I  said,  the  council  was  in  session ; 

The  case  was  called,  and  everything  made  ready 
For  prompt  procedure.     Michael  puts  a  question 

Of  some  perplexity,  and  thinks  a  speedy 
Decision  should  be  had,  without  suppression 

Of  fact  or  circumstance.    "  The  truth  is,"  said  he, 
'  The  devil  insists  upon  his  own  attendance, 
And  brooks  him  no  denial  I  may  send  hence. 

XCII. 

'  He  claims  the  right  of  cross-examination 
For  all  his  witnesses,  and  'says,  without  it, 

Your  council  will  be  but  an  iteration 

Of  that  on  earth,  with  less  of  form  about  it ; 

And  thinks  that  you  should  issue  a  citation 
To  bring  him  in,  where  he  can  give  a  stout  hit 

At  priests  and  parsons,  in  a  certain  quarter, 

Who  daub  at  present  with  untempered  mortar. 


•  136 

XCIII. 

'  Let  no  citation  issue,"  said  Saint  Peter ; 

"  For  that  would  be  a  virtual  recognition 
That  he  has  rights  that  we  are  bound  to  see  to, 

If  not  respect,  as  he  shall  make  petition ; 
When  the  fact  is,  the  vile  old  fire-eater 

Has  not  a  single  right,  save  to  perdition ; 
But  let  him  come  and  go  (if  so  it  please  him) 
On  this  occasion,  as  the  whim  shall  seize  him." 

xcrv. 

The  devil  came,  according  to  the  adage, 

That,  "  talked  about,  he's  always  near  at  hand : 

As  he  would  seem  to  be  in  this  too  sad  age, 
With  all  his  artifices  in  demand ; 

Or  such  of  them,  at  least,  as  help  our  mad  age 
To  quite  bedevil  all  its  churches,  and 

So  stultify  them,  with  its  blood-ebriety, 

That  they  mistake  bedevilments  for  piety  !  1 5 

XCV. 

And  with  him  came  Asmodeus,  in  such  guise, 
He  seemed  another  Proteus  run  mad ; 

At  first  he  looked  an  owl  and  very  wise, 
And  then  an  ape,  and  then  a  weazened  lad  ; 

Changing  as  did  the  cloud  to  Hamlet's  eyes, 
Or  rather  those  in  old  Polonins'  head : — 

At  first  a  camel,  then  a  weasel's  tail, 

And  then  again  so  "  very  like  a  whale." 


137 


XCVL 

And  yet  he  had  a  most  malicious  look, 

And  wore  it  all  the  while,  as  does  a  minister 

A  sanctimonious  face  for  his  own  flock ; 

Put  on  sometimes  from  motives  quite  as  sinister 

As  what  inspired  the  devil  when  he  took 

His  first  voyage  after  deviltry  to  Finis-  Terre, 

Or  "  Land's-end,"  as  this  mundane  sphere  of  ours 

Was  whilom  called  by  the  infernal  powers. 

XCVII. 

But  I  am  getting  hard  into  a  hundred 
Stanzas  of  this  my  last  mad  canto,  and 

Must,  keep  the  thread  of  narrative  unsundered, 
Or  my  discursive  fancy  will  soon  land 

Me  high  and  dry,  and  leave  my  task  unthundered 
Both  in  the  index  and  the  printer's  hand ; 

And  save  the  snarling  critics  and  reviewers 

From  quite  exhausting  all  their  inky  sewers. 

XCVIII. 

I  know  what  some  will  say,  and  others  write; 

How  contumaciously  some,  mighty  plumes 
Will  hold  their  ink,  refusing  to  indite 

Censure  or  praise.    What  piles  and  hecatombs 
Will  be  upreared,  of  party  hate  and  spite ; 

How  they  will  suck  their  dirty,  inky  thumbs, 
And  swear  the  thing  is  damnable,  and  so  forth, 
But  wherein,  not  so  politic  to  show  forth. 


138 

XCIX. 

I  know  that  some  will  "  rip"  and  others  "  swear" 
Most  toweringly ;  that  some  will  put  on  airs 

And  bear  themselves,  or  try  to,  with  hauteur, 
And  others  "  damn  it"  even  in  their  prayers  ; 

Some  will,  in  spite  of  all  denials,  wear 
The  coat  we  fit  them — put  it  on  as  theirs  ; 

Others  will  writhe  like  serpents  and  scotch  bless  us, 

Or  damn  us  roundly,  for  this  robe  of  Nessus. 


Some,  like  the  viper  that  assailed  the  file, 

Will  gnaw  at  us,  and,  sucking  down  the  blood, 

Imagine  they  have  struck  a  vein  of  bile 
From  which  to  quarry  most  delicious  food ; 

But  when  they've  gnawed  till  they  have  got  their  fill 
Of  spite  and  hate,  according  to  their  mood, 

They'll  find,  as  did  the  viper,  with  a  sigh, 

That  they  have  only  sucked  their  own  veins  dry. 

CI. 

While  others  to  their  holes  will  hie  and  hiss ; 

Or  dart  their  tongues  at  us  and  glide  away 
With  eyes  as  green  as  any  basilisk, 

And  quite  as  full  of  venom  ;  or  else  stay 
And  coil  themselves  to  strike  at  any  risk, 

And,  striking,  rue  their  rash  temerity  ; 
Or — but  I'll  run  the  simile  no  further, 
For  fear  my  muse  will  stumble  on  another. 


139 


en. 

'  Call  Roger  Williams !"  was  the  order  given, 

"  And  Richard  Mather  and  his  grandson  Cotton  : — 
You  may  not  find  the  last  two  yet  in  heaven, 

Nor  on  the  earth,  where  they  were  first  begotten ; 
But  somewhat  nearer  Mars,  where  they  are  given 
To  smashing  planets  up,  as  if  they'd  naught  in 
But  glycerene,  or  some  such  pent-up  devil 
As  'mid  the  fragments  of  a  world  would  revel !" 

cm. 

The  shadows  came,  and  were  interrogated 
About  their  Puritanic  creeds  and  notions ; 

Why  they  had  left  their  native  land  as  stated, 
And  braved  the  dangers  of  two  several  oceans ; 

And  why  their  children  ever  since  had  prated 
About  their  virtues,  as  if  they  were  Phocions, 

Aristideses,  Platos,  and  what  not, 

And,  prating,  left  their  principles  to  rot, 

CIV. 

As  they  had  done  in  certain  Boston  churches, 

With  Christless  creeds  and.  pulpits  turned  to  rostrums 

Where  parsons  walk  on  stilts  and  laymen  crutches, 
As  best  accords  with  transcendental  customs  ; 

And  where  a  sea  of  mystery,  as  such,  is 
Esteemed  the  best  in  which  to  "  bob"  for  nostrums ; 

Or  such  politico-religious  quackery 

As  might  be  dished  up  by  another  Thackeray. 


140 

cv. 

And  further  asked  them  about  hanging  women 
For  riding  broomsticks  in  the  air  so  high 

As  to  brush  down  the  cobwebs  they  might  spin  in 
Their  theologio  revels  through  the  sky ; 

Or  for  such  other  freaks  as  they  had  been  in, 
As  turning  into  black  cats  "  on  the  sly,"  ]  6 

And  sucking  infants'  breaths,  and  maidens'  sighs, 

With  other  antics  and  rare  deviltries  ! 

CVI. 

And  so  continued  a  historic  chain 
Of  curt  inquiry,  till  they  came,  at  last, 

To  the  New  Haven  Council ;  when  'twas  plain 
The  devil  meant  to  get  his  "/oot"  in  fast; 

For  he  at  once  adroitly  turned  the  main, 
Or  leading,  question  into  a  mere  jest ; 

Remarking  that  the  conclave,  if  demonian, 

Was  none  the  less  so  than  it  was  Baconian  ! 

CVII. 

"  I'd  like  to  know,"  said  Satan,  "  by  what  few 

This  Council  was  convened.     It  looks  as  though 

I  had  some  hand  in  the  affair,  'tis  true, — 
Some  instigations  set  on  foot  below  ; 

But  I  will  clear  my  skirts  of  this  fco  you," 
Addressing  Michael ;  "  for  I  think  you  know 

My  antecedents  well  enough  to  grant, 

I  never  deal  in  spiritual  cant, 


141 


CVIII. 

1  And  quite  as  much  detest  political ; 

But  when  the  two  are  '  mixed,'  it  is  enough 
The  most  demoniac  appetite  to  pall, 

Or  reach  and  vomit  the  infernal  stuff; 
Though  I  perceive  your  clergy,  one  and  all, 

Take  to  it  as  a  child  to  blind-man's-buff, 
That  is,  instinctively,  or  with  a  mind 
That '  goes  it'  indiscriminately  •  blind!'  " 

CIX. 

Michael  replied  :  "  'Tis  true  what  you  have  said,- 
'  True,  'tis  a  pity — pity  'tis,  'tis  true.' — 

The  fools  and  knaves  are  not  as  yet  all  dead ; 
Albeit  some  of  late  have  troubled  you 

With  their  mad  exits— made  as  if  stark  mad; 
Though  with  the  'benefit  of  clergy,'  who 

Got  up  their  jackass  dance  upon  the  grave 

Of  liberty — a  party  creed  to  save  !" 

CX. 

Asmodeus  here  gave  Lucifer  a  nudge, 

And  hinted  that  the  Apostles  were  in  haste 

To  close  their  sitting.     "  Let  no  ancient  grudge," 
Said  he,  "  against  the  clergy  so  o'ercast 

Your  judgment  with  a  cloud  as  to  prejudge 
Their  case,  whilst  they  stand  here  aghast, 

Like  convicts  in  a  dock  -awaiting  sentence, 

And  past  all  hope,  as  they  are  past  repentance." 


142 


CXI. 

Meanwhile  Saint  Paul  was  plying  Cotton  Mather 
With  questions  growing  every  minute  sharper, 

Anent  those  Puritanic  creeds,  or  rather 

Those  practices  that  made  the  world  a  carper 

At  Christian  dogmas ;  such  as  every  Father 

Once  deemed  essential,  and  from  which  to  warp,  or 

Turn  aside,  was  downright  heresy  ; 

So  strictly  was  the  faith  kept  in  their  day. 

CXII. 

'  And  pray,"  said  Paul,  still  pressing  home  th.e  point 

Of  his  inquiry  to  the  reverend  Cotton, 
'  What  right  had  they  to  coin  as  from  a  mint 

The  lies  they  uttered, — those,  I  mean,  who  brought  on 
The  ecclesiastic  war  thus  waged  in  print?" 

(For  he  was  speaking  of  the  time  they'd  gotten 
Their  famous  council  up  on  the  authority 

Of  Minor's  great  minority-majority  !) 17 

CXIII. 

'  But  why  hold  him  responsible,  who  had 

No  hand  in  the  affair,  as  I  can  see  ?" 
Inquired  the  devil.     "  Surely  it  is  bad 

Enough  to  be  lampooned  in  one's  own  day 
For  sins  like  his,  and  live  in  pasquinade 

Forever  after ;  but  for  one  to  be 
Arraigned  for  all  the  sins  of  all  the  ages, 
Is  getting  for  his  own  sins  damn'd  good  wages  !" 


143 

CXIV. 

Paul  frowned  indignantly  at  this  intrusion, 
But  still  replied  :  "  When  sins  are  propagated 

In  any  given  line  by  sheer  delusion, 
They  stand  to  other  sins  so  correlated, 

Thai  all  are  one,  as  if  by  act  of  fusion ; 
The  sins  of  fathers  are  thus  cumulated, 

Or  heaped  up  in  their  children,  till  they  seem 

Of  all  past  sin  the  quintessential  cream ! 

CXV. 

•'  I've  summoned  here  the  Puritanic  fathers 

As  the  great  fountain-head  and  source  of  hate, 

And  have  interrogated  thus  the  Mathers, 
And  certain  others,  on  the  present  state 

Of  their  late  churches,  with  their  party  tethers ; 
And  find,  as  I  expected,  that  '  to  plate 

One's  sins  with  gold,'  and  put  them  off  for  piety, 

Is  Puritanic  practice  to  satiety  !" 

CXVI. 

At  this  the  devil  reefed  his  "  caudal  sail," 
As  if  he  thought  Saint  Paul  was  after  "game  ;' 

Or  getting  to  the  clergy  person^, 

By  hints  at  Kallock  with  his  "  winsome  dame ;' 

Whereby  there  hangs  a  narrative,  or  tale 

So  like  the  devil's,  one  would  swear  the  sham 

Transcended  the  reality  or  real, 

Were  Boston  clergy  not  his  beau-ideal ! 


144 


CXVII. 

The  council  thus  proceeding,  forth  there  came 

From  out  the  mist  a  spiritual  form, 
Tall,  stately,  grand,  majestic  as  a  flame, 

And  awful  as  its  presence  in  a  storm  ; 
Whose  outward  bearing  seemed  but  to  proclaim 

Himself  a  king — his  fellow  man  a  worm  : — 
Retaining  all  the  dignity  of  earth, 
When  intellectual  giants  had  their  birth.  1 8 

CXVIII. 

He  glanced  at  the  Apostles  with  some  grace 
But  more  hauteur,  as  if  he  deemed  them  men 

With  little  knowledge  of  the  Greek  and  less 
Of  Latin,  and  of  dialectics  none ; 

Whom  any  sophomore  of  Yale  could  dress 
Out  handsomely  in  logic ; — if  not,  then 

He,  the  great  Prex  Timotheus,  could  show  'em 

How,  syllogistically,  to  trip  and  throw  'em !  l  - 

CXIX. 

He  had  been  once  a  Prex  who  was  a  Prex — 
"  Ay,  every  inch  a"  Prex ;  and  made  his  pupils 

Demean  themselves  tdtfards  him  as  towards  a  Rex — 
"  Ay,  every  inch  a"  Rex  :  and  had  no  scruples 

About  his  right  to  cane  them,  should  they  vex 
His  temper,  or  refuse  to  go  in  couples 

Along  the  street,  and  promptly  take  their  tiles  off, 

Whene'er  they  saw  him,  though  they  might  be  miles  off !  2 ' 


145 


cxx. 

This  stately  form  drew  near  to  heaven's  gate, 
Where  sat  the  Apostles  in  deliberation ; 

But  whence  it  came,  'twere  difficult  to  state ; 
Save  that  a  somewhat  slight  concatenation 

Of  favoring  circumstances,  added  weight 
To  the  suspicion  that  the  exact  location 

Was  not  what  one  would  naturally  expect, 

Taking  his  earthly  prestige  with  the  "  elect." 

CXXL 

But  come  he  did,  in  outward  seeming  one 
More  like  a  god  in  priestly  robes  than  man ; 

While  in,  and  through,  and  round  about  him,  shone 
A  spectral  light  that  taperingly  upran 

Into  a  pyramidal  shaft  or  cone, 
As  if  to  body  forth  the  Puritan 

Idea  of  righteousness ;  or  that  nonentity 

That  stalks  the  "  ghost  of  a  departed  quantity." 

CXXII. 

As  Bishop  Berkeley  once  defined  a  fluxion, 
Or  differential  tapering  down  to  zero  ; 

Whereof  it  is  the  acme  of  instruction, 
In  universities,  to  help  some  tyro 

Over  the  "  Ass's  Bridge,"  by  sheer  deduction. 
In  crossing  once  myself,  I  seemed  a  hero 

Of  such  Gargantuan  stature,  that  I  drew 

More  first  sham  prizes  than  there  were  of  true. 


146 

CXXIII. 

0  Learning !  what  a  glorious  thing  thou  art ! 

0  Mathematics,  vcl  scientia 
Scientiarum  !  how  I  got  by  heart 

Thy  mystic  symbols  in  the  days  of  Day 
And  Stanley— ere  old  Yale  was  set  apart 

To  politics  and  glory  in  her  way  ! 
0  Greek  and  Latin  !  Homer,  Virgil,  Livy  ! 
Thine  all  the  honors  that  the  world  can  give  ye  ! 

CXXIV. 

And  honor  to  Old  Yale,  but  not  to  New  ; 

To  Yale  as  she  once  was — the  pride  and  glory 
Of  all  her  sons  whom  chance  or  fortune  threw 

Within  her  pale,  then  sacred  grown  and  hoary 
In  honors  as  in  years  ;  when  proudlier  grew 

The  Northern  heart  to  read  her  frequent  story 
Of  laurels  for  some  Southern  victor  twined, 
Won  in  her  splendid  tournaments  of  mind  !  2  ] 

CXXV. 

But  pardon  me  digression.    I  have  said 
The  stately  form  drew  near  to  heaven's  gate, 

And  there  demanded  to  be  promptly  heard 
On  the  indictment ;  first,  alleging  that 

'Twas  anti-Puritanic  spleen  which  led 
To  this  bald  charge  of  Puritanic  hate, — 

A  charge  that  had  its  origin  with  those 

Who  most  had  tweaked  the  Puritanic  nose  ! 


147 


CXXVI. 

Besides,  the  charge  was  frivilous,  and  ought- 
No  longer  to  disgrace  the  record.     He 

Had  heard  it  uttered  times  enough,  he  thought, 
As  the  mere  echo  of  malignity ; 

Or  cry  of  "  mad  dog"  by  such  haters  brought 
As  Penn,  and  Oglethorpe,  and  Arthur  Lee  ; 

Or  their  descendants,  with  the  Knickerbockers, 

Notoriously  the  worst  religious  mockers  ! 

CXXVII. 

And  there  were  others — to  their  shame  be't  said — 
New  Englanders  by  birth,  who  made  the  charge 

A  hundred  times  repeated  on  this  head  ; 
And  had  the  audacity  to  go  at  large 

Without  the  fear  of  lamp  posts,  or  the  dread 
Of  halters  for  their  necks,  or  a  balmage 

Of  tar  and  feathers,  cunningly  laid  on, 

As  they  deserved,  each  recreant  mother's  son." 

CXXYIII. 

Paul  promptly  interposed  :  "  No  more  of  such, 
Defence  like  this  will  scarcely  now  avail ; 

Your  lamp-posts  and  your  halters  are  as  much 
Detested  here  as  is  the  "little  bell" 

Of  Seward  on  the  earth ;  or  as  the  church 
That  tintinnabulates  its  foes  to  hell, 

Or  hourly  rings  out  such  a  peal  for  blood 

As  would  disgrace  the  worst  Camanche  code." 


148 


CXXIX. 

'But  bells  should  ring  'gainst  'treason'  as  'gainst  fire 

"Ah,  yes  !"  says  Paul,  "  I  understand  that  word: 
Treason  is  '  treason'  when  against  your  '  higher 

Law'  of  Puritantic  conscience  it  is  heard 
To  thunder  its  appeal ;  but  when  the  dire 

Alternative  presents  to  you  the  sword 
Or  conscience  of  another,  then  the  treason 
Is  quite  a  different  thing,  for  potent  reason." 

CXXX. 

'•'  But  they  refused  to  ring  their  bell  when  we 

Were  all  aglow  with  patriotic  ardor, 
And  thanking  God  for  his  great  victory 

Vouchsafed  to  us  against  the  '  devil's  guard,'  or 
Those  most  perjured  villains  under  Lee, 

Whose  greatest  glory  'twas  to  rob  some  larder, 
Or  rich  man's  turkey-roost  along  the  line, 
And  when  we  proffered  battle,  to  decline." 

CXXXI. 

'  A  most  veracious  history  !"  Paul  replied, 
"  But  such  an  one  as  party  hate  must  write 
To  vindicate  itself  against  all  side 

And  other  issues,  growing  out  the  fight; 
But  you  forget  how  every  patriot  tried 

To  stay  this  flood  of  party  hate  and  spite, 
Engendered  by  your  pulpits,  and  how  fierce 
Was  your  denunciation  of  their  course." 


149 


CXXXII. 

"  But  then  they  prayed  for  peace,  when  peace  had  been 
Disgrace  and  ruin  to  our  cause."     "  But  peace 

'  In  God's  own  time  and  way.'    State  just  the  sin 
That  they  were  guilty  of,  no  more,  no  less ; 

Then  bring  to  heaven  your  prayers,  and  show  wherein 
They  breathed  a  heavenlier  fragrance  or  more  grace ; 

And  tell  us  why  your  '  Center  Church,'  or  people, 

Shot  all  the  white-wing'd  doves  within  their  steeple."  22 

cxxxm. 

"  Because  of  their  defilements  !"     "  Yes,  you  mean, 
When  vultures  are  your  symbols,  doves  defile ; 

Though  the  Mosaic  ritual  makes  them  clean, 
And  vultures,  of  all  birds  of  prey,  most  vile ; 

The  one  goes  out  the  olive  leaf  to  glean, 
The  other,  like  the  raven,  after  spoil ; 

Or  to  '  fly  to  and  fro'  the  earth  like  Cain, 

With  the  brand  on  him  of  a  brother  slain." 

CXXXIV. 

"  But  they  declined  a  '  mutual  council'  when 

'Twas  right  and  proper  that  the  church  should  have  one ;" 
"Yes,  proper  for  the  '  lion  on  the  plain,' 

But  not  the  '  lamb  upon  the  hill'  to  brave  one  ; 
You've  no  doubt  read  the  fable,  and  have  seen 

How  graciously  the  lion  seemed  to  crave  one, — 
Proffering  the  lamb  his  velvet-footed  paws, 
But  quite  concealing  all  his  ugly  claws !" 
10 


150 


cxxxv. 

•  And  they  employed  as  '  acting  pastor'  one 

Not  '  ministerially  ordained'  (so  says 
Report  of  Council),  and  who  seemed  to  shun 

Investigation  in  a  hundred  ways  : 
Keeping  his  brother  pastors  on  the  run, 

By  trotting  out  his  '  blacks'  as  well  as  '  bays ;' 
And  wearing  all  the  while,  for  them  to  note, 
A  most  provoking  'ministerial  coat' !"  23 

CXXXVI. 

At  this  quintuple  charge  the  devil  grinned, 
And  thought  it  time  for  him  to  drop  an  oar 

And  help  the  Doctor's  sails  to  catch  the  wind 
And  belly  out  their  canvass  flaps  once  more  ; 

And  thus  he  dipped :  "  This  pastor  must  have  sinned 
Against  his  flock  egregiously,  before 

They  got  such  Minor  charges  and  grave  laughter, 

With  which  to  split  the  world's  sides  ever  after  !" 

CXXXVII. 

And  dipped  again  :  "  This  very  wicked  pastor 
Has  led  quite  captive  certain  silly  minds 

About  the  teachings,  anent  slave  and  master, 
Of  the  Apostles,  as  the  Council  finds  ; 

And  what  is  more  heretical,  drives  faster 
With,  than  without,  ecclesiastic  'blinds  ;' 

Taking  the  '  ribbons'  from  his  own  '  crack'  driver, 

To  show — he  cares  not  for  us  a  Dutch  stiver  !"  24 


151 

CXXXVIII. 

Again  he  plashed  his  oar  :  "  And  then  he  came 
Without  '  credentials,'  or  so  much  as  letters 

Of  introduction  to  the  great  'I  am,' 
Or  nabob  of  the  churches,  with  his  fetters 

Ready  to  rivet  on  with  proper  aim ; — 
As  teaching  '  youngsters'  to  regard  their  betters 

With  due  respect,  if  not  with  such  devotion 

As  to  secure  thereafter — prompt  promotion." 

CXXXIX. 

And  still  he  plashed  :  "  Again  he  had  the  audacity 
To  make  a  certain  fling  at  Parson  Gulliver, 

As  being  too  '  Munchausenish,'  when  for  veracity 
You'll  scarcely  find  his  equal,  should  you  cull  over 

A  hundred  different  churches.    True,  tenacity 
Is  his  great  foible,  but  with  '  wool'  to  pull  over 

A  church  or  two,  like  the  recusant  '  South,' 

His  greater  foible  is  to  stretch  the  truth !" 

CXL. 

Saint  Paul  here  rose,  and,  placid  as  a  sea 
Between  two  frowning  head-lands,  waved  a  gesture 

To  Satan  first,  and  then  to  Doctor  D. ; — 

Who  stood  inspecting  each  the  other's  vesture 

As  well  as  features,  somewhat  curiously ; 
And  said,  as  he  uprose :  "  You'll  simply  rest  your 

Cases  here ;  no  further  facts  are  needed, 

And  if  they  were,  your  last  would  not  be  heeded. 


152 

CXLL 

'  This  Council  was  convened  for  the  revision 
Of  such  proceedings  in  the  one  below 

As  stood  out  flagrantly,  in  the  decision, 

The  promptings  of  the  malice  they  would  show ; 

And  time  were  wasted  here,  if  mere  derision 
Could  find  a  soil  in  which  to  root  and  grow ; 

But  earthly  councils,  it  must  be  confest, 

Oft  furnish  little  food,  except  for  jest. 

CXLII. 

'  'Tis  ordered  that  henceforth  throughout  the  skies 
This  earthly  council  stand  '  Anathema- 

Maranatha'  for  its  blasphemies, 
And  be  dismissed  our  hearing  without  day  ; 

The  church  of  God  its  findings  scandalize, 
By  usurpations  of  authority  ; 

And  making  heaven  and  earth  and  hell  and  fate, 

All  to  a  party  creed  subordinate  1" 

CXLUL 

With  this  consummate  finding,  Paul  retires ; 

Leaving  the  Muse  by  laws  of  epic  rhyme, 
As  by  the  curfew,  to  rake  up  her  fires 

With  all  their  glowing  embers,  'gainst  such  time 
As  she  to  loftier  theme  perchance  aspires, 

And  takes  once  more  her  epic  march  sublime  ; 
But  ere  she  makes  her  curfew  for  the  night, 
This  parting  strain  the  Muse  would  fain  indite : 


153 

CXLIV. 

The  saddest  of  all  sights  in  heaven  to  see, 
Is  a  deluded  soul  just  come  from  earth  ; 

One  that  has  lived  a  life  of  enmity, 
And  deemed  its  hate  a  throe  of  second  birth ; 

At  none  do  angels  weep  more  bitterly, 
Or  hell  send  up  a  deeper  shout  of  mirth  ; 

And  when  that  soul  confronts  the  final  wrath, 

How  awful  is  the  presence  of  its  death  ! 

CXLT. 

And  oh,  the  mad  delusion  when  a  soul 
Mistakes  excess  of  hate  for  righteousness  ; 

And  battens  on  its  lymph  as  if  'twere  all 
The  aliment  it  had  of  special  grace ; 

Unless  it  were  its  rancor,  spleen  and  gall 
Combined  together,  as  was  once  the  case 

With  the  New  Haven  clergy,  when  they  tried 

The  immortal  Whitfield  on  a  rail  to  ride !  25 

CXLVT. 

Or  rather  notified  him  not  to  preach 
Or  pray  within  their  sheepfold ;  if  he  did, 

A  coat  of  tar  and  feathers  he  would  catch, 
And  on  a  rail,  fantastically  bestrid, 

Be  posted  out  of  town  like  any  wretch 

That  dared  to  preach  when  they  had  once  forbid. 

But  Whitfield,  heeding  not  their  wrathful  threat, 

Proclaimed  his  Master  on  the  public  street. 


154 


CXLVII. 

This  Puritanic  hate  has  come  to  be 
More  dread  than  was  the  choler  of  Achilles, 

The  wrathful  son  of  Peleus ;  and  I  see 
No  antidote  for  it  but  in  the  Greeleys 

And  Beechers  of  New  England.    They  can  slay 
The  monster,  if  they  will ;  for  on  their  bellies 

They've  crawled  all  fawningly  into  his  den, 

And  can,  to  strangle  him,  do  so  again. 

CXLYHI. 

But  others  have  worked  bravely  to  this  end  : 

None  more  so  than  the  young  and  dauntless  preacher, 

Who  feared  not  man  but  God ;  and  would  not  lend 
His  office  or  his  robes  to  be  a  teacher 

Of  party  politics,  though  earth  should  bend 
Her  smiles  upon  him,  and  bid  Fame  to  reach  her 

Every  honor  down.    He'd  spurn  them  all, 

Bather  than  put  upon  his  soul  such  thrall. 

CXLIX. 

How  he  has  stemmed  the  current  of  this  hate, 
Few  now  may  know,  and  less  perhaps  hereafter ; 

But  souls  like  his  can  bide  their  time  and  wait. 
They  have  no  need  of  subterfuge,  or  craft,  or 

Any  thing  but  heaven,  to  vindicate 

Their  course.    Scorn,  contumely,  hate ;  the  laughter 

Of  knaves  and  fools ;  the  jeer  of  gathered  crowds, 

They  heed  no  more  than  Socrates  '  The  Clouds.' 


155 


CK 

Earth  gives  few  nobler  exhibitions  than 
A  brave  man  battling  with  the  storms  of  fate, 

Unless  it  be  that  other,  braver  man, 
Who  fearlessly  confronts  its  storms  of  hate ; — 

Storms  that  are  pitiless  as  partisan, 
And  as  remorseless  as  the  grave  to  sate ; — 

To  such  a  storm  this  youth  has  bared  his  breast, 

And  bid  the  waves  of  passion  do  their  worst ! 

CLI. 

But  there's  another,  whom  to  name  would  be 

To  index  all  the  virtues  in  one  man  ; 
Brave,  generous,  true,  and  of  integrity 

That  scorns  all  refuge  in  the  partisan ; 
Who  looks  out  calmly  on  the  stormful  sea 

Of  politics,  where  the  mad  breakers  run, 
As  if  to  catch  his  Master's  words  of  "  Peace, 
Be  still !"  and  see  the  troubled  waters  cease. 

CLH. 

His  thin  white  locks,  pale  cheek,  and  thoughtful  brow, 
Bespeak  the  Christian  man,  and  "  full  of  years ;" 

One  whom  the  world  might  honor,  did  it  know, 
And,  honoring,  elevate  the  crown  it  wears ; 

And  yet  no  honor  that  the  world  can  show, 
Could  so  adorn  as  does  his  weight  of  cares ; — 

A  weight  that  lightens  with  each  day's  return 

Of  tasks  and  duties,  ever  nobly  done. 


156 


CLIII. 

Reared  in  the  morals  of  the  olden  school, 
Rich  in  endowments,  and  with  learning  graced ; 

Strict  to  observe  himself  the  golden  rule, 
Or  line  of  duty  for  another  traced ; 

Of  plenty  careful,  yet  of  bounty  full,— 
Giving  as  if  the  giver  were  most  blessed ; 

His  manner  saying :  "  These  poor  gifts  receive, 

And  give  Him  thanks  who  grants  the  power  to  give." 

CLIV. 

With  largess  such  as  this,  in  which  he  shares 
The  bounty  heaven  bestows  on  him  in  trust, 

A  noble  structure  to  his  God  he  rears, 
And  lowly  prostrates  there  his  head  in  dust ; 

Asking  acceptance  of  repentant  tears 
As  a  libation  deemed  by  Him  the  first 

An  erring  soul  should  make  to  win  the  skies, 

And  share  with  angels  in  its  ecstacies. 

CLV. 

If  noblest  virtues  can  a  name  endear, 

That  name  is  HALLOCK'S,  as  the  world  must  own ; 
Though  priestly  hates  may  scowl  on  him,  and  wear 

Their  most  indignant  and  imperious  frown, 
That  he  should  have  the  audacity  to  rear 

A  church  to  the  Great  Shepherd  Christ  alone : — 
A  sin  so  great  in  Puritanic  eyes, 
It  reaches  heaven,  and  profanates  the  skies  ! 


157 

CLVI. 

If  largest  forecast,  or  a  mind  to  see 
"  Before  and  after,"  in  affairs  of  state  ; 
If  lofty  thoughts  that  grasp  futurity 

As  with  Apollo's  fearful  gift  of  fate ; 
If  high  resolves,  and  grand  simplicity, 

Can  make  a  Nestor  truly  good  and  great ; 
Then  he,  of  all  men  in  this  modern  time, 
Is  thrice  a  Nestor,  without  Nestor's  crime. 

CLVII. 

For  he — the  noblest  Roman  of  us  all — 
Retires,  like  Cincinnatus,  from  the  strife, 

Exiled  from  duty  by  a  fierce  cabal 

That  plays  the  tyrant  with  a  nation's  life, 

And  seeks  to  put,  as  subjects  under  thrall, 
Both  men  and  states,  to  bold  its  sway  in  brief : 

When  crimes  like  these  inflame  the  wrath  of  heaven, 

The  posts  of  honor  to  the  vile  are  given. 


PREFATORIAL  NOTE. 


The  author  deems  it  necessary,  for  the  better  understanding  of  the 
several  incidents  alluded  to  in  the  course  of  the  preceding  poem,  to 
give  a  brief  history  of  the  proceedings  which  led  to  the  ecclesiastical 
and  political  ostracism  of  the  South  Church.  This  church  was  consti- 
tuted in  the  autumn  of  1852,  shortly  after  the  completion  of  the 
beautiful  church  edifice,  now  standing  on  Columbus  street,  in  the 
south-western  part  of  the  city  of  New  Haven,  and  receiving  its  name 
from  the  circumstance  of  its  location.  This  edifice,  which  is  built  of 
brown  stone,  from  the  celebrated  Portland  quarries,  is  one  of  the 
largest  in  the  city,  and  for  architectural  simplicity  and  beauty  of  pro- 
portion, is  unsurpassed  by  any  similar  structure  in  the  State.  It  was 
erected  mainly  through  the  agency  and  munificence  of  GERARD 
HALLOCK,  at  that  time  one  of  the  proprietors  and  the  senior  editor  of 
the  New  York  Journal  of  Commerce,  and  was  rented  by  him  to  the 
church  society  for  "  one  barleycorn  a  year."  In  January,  1862.  the 
church  extended  a  call  to  the  Rev.  J.  Halsted  Carroll,  who  was  then 
residing  in  Brooklyn,  N.  Y.,  to  supply  the  pulpit  and  act  as  Pastor  for 
one  year  This  call  was  accepted,  and  Mr.  Carroll  soon  after  became 
the  acting  Pastor  of  the  church.  His  sermons,  which  were  of  the 
very  highest  order,  and  his  eloquence,  which  had  never  been  surpass- 
ed in  any  pulpit  in  the  city,  at  once  attracted  general  atteution,  and 
elicited  the  warmest  encomiums  from-  all  who  heard  him. 

But  it  was  soon  discovered  that  he  was  not  a  political  preacher ; 
that  his  sermons  were  all  of  a  deeply  religious  character ;  that  "  Christ 
and  him  crucified"  was  the  one  great,  and  almost  exclusive  theme  on 
which  he  dwelt ;  and  that  no  persuasions,  no  throats  or  attempts  at  in- 
timidation, no  incentives  to  popular  favor — nothing  that  could  be  done 


160 


or  said — served,  in  the  slightest  degree,  to  turn  him  aside  from  the 
straight  line  of  duty  he  had  marked  out  for  himself,  in  his  ministerial 
labors.  And  what  was  more  terrible  still,  he  prayed  for  PEACE  !  for 
peace  in  God's  own  time  and  way, — not  as  man  thinketh  and  willeth, 
but  as  the  all-merciful  Prince  of  Peace,  the  Great  Head  of  the  Church, 
might  will  and  direct.  This,  and  this  alone,  was  his  heresy !  To  pray 
thus  in  New  England,  was  in  the  highest  degree  schismatical,  revolu- 
tionary, and  unorthodox.  The  consequence  was,  that  it  drew  down 
upon  him  the  judiciary  anathema  of  all  the  orthodox  churches  in  the 
city.  Not  one  would  fellowship  him,  or  in  the  slightest  degree  recog- 
nize him,  as  having  any  ministerial  right,  function,  or  duty  whatever. 
He  was  at  once  morally,  socially,  politically  and  ecclesiastically  ostra- 
cised, and  put  under  the  ban ;  and  that  not  only  by  the  clergy,  but  by 
the  "  loyal"  portion  of  bis  own  congregation.  At  the  expiration  of  the 
year  for  which  he  was  called  by  the  church  society,  the  opposition 
thus  fanned  against  him  by  the  clerical  wing  of  the  town,  showed 
itself  in  all  its  virulence  and  animosity,  among  a  portion  of  his  own 
people.  The  hatred  of  the  New  Haven  clergy  cropped  out  in  the  laity 
of  his  own  church,  and  loud  complaints  of  "  disloyalty"  were  heard 
against  him  on  every  side, — "  disloyalty"  as  evinced  by  his  prayers  for 
heaven-sent,  heaven-vouchsafed  Peace !  But  a  majority  of  the  church 
decided  to  retain  him.  This  sent  the  minority  off  in  "  loyal"  disgust 
from  the  church.  They  all  asked  for  letters  of  dismission,  which  were 
promptly  granted;  and  thereupon  "Secessia  No.  2"  existed,  and  had 
a  pragmatic  sanction. 

But,  as  the  South  Church  was  an  independent  organization,  (not 
being  consociated  with  the  other  churches  of  the  State,)  this  left  Mr. 
Carroll  where  he  could  not  be  ecclesiastically  or  otherwise  reached  by 
"the  dominant  and  domineering  faction  of  the  town.  The  hasty  action 
of  the  minority  in  withdrawing  as  they  did,  having  been  reconsidered 
in  caucus,  it  was  decided  that  they  should  return  to  the  church  and 
demand  an  ecclesiastical  council  to  right  their  wrongs !  But, 

"Facills  desceiiKus  Avernl : 
Sed  revocare  gradum,— 
Hoc  opus,  hie  labor  eat." 


161 

To  get  out  of  the  church  was  easy ;  but  to  get  back  again — there  was 
the  rub.  The  society  was  rid  of  its  marplots,  and  would  not  recognize 
them  as  having  any  longer  any  rights,  not  even  those  of  a  belligerent, 
in  the  church.  This  brought  them  to  a  new  tack.  They  proposed  a 
mutual  council ;  that  is,  a  council  in  which  the  South  Church,  as  one 
party,  and  some  dozen  other  churches,  as  another  party,  should  sit 
and  pass  upon  their  grievances  1  This  oroposition  was  declined,  for 
the  same  reason  that  the  Lamb,  in  the  Fable,  declined  the  proffer  of 
the  Lion,  when  invited  to  descend  from  the  hill-top  into  the  flowery 
mead  below.  There  was  a  good  deal  of  pious  wheedling  to  bring  this 
nice  little  arrangement  about;  but  it  failed  for  the  reason,  that  the 
Lion's  claws  were  altogether  too  visible  in  the  velvet-footed  programme. 
There  being  no  alternative  left  but  to  call  an  ex  parte  council,  this  was 
finally  done.  Accordingly,  on  the  21st  day  of  December,  1863,  an 
Ecclesiastical  Council,  composed  of  the  pastor  and  a  delegate  from 
twelve  churches  in  the  State,  was  convened  in  the  Orange  Street 
Chapel,  where  its  sessions  were  continued  for  three  days. 

The  first  question  to  be  decided  was,  how  they  were  to  take  juris- 
diction of  the  case.  The  South  Church  was  an  independent  society, 
never  having  been,  as  we  have  already  stated,  consociated  with  the 
other  churches,  or  in  any  way  dependent  on  them.  It  had  built  its 
own  church  edifice,  organized  its  own  society,  employed  its  own  pas- 
tor, (who  happened  in  this  instance  to  be  a  Presbyterian  and  not  a 
Congregational  clergyman,)  and  transacted  its  own  business  generally. 
To  all  intents  and  purposes,  it  was,  so  far  as  ecclesiastical  discipline  was 
concerned,  as  separate  from,  and  independent  of,  the  Congregational 
Churches  of  New  England,  as  the  Greek  Churches  of  Russia,  or  the 
Romish  Churches  of  Austria.  But  the  Council,  having  thoroughly 
beaten  the  "legal 'cover,"  finally  flushed  up  this  proposition:  "That 
an  independent  Congregational  Church,  not  consociated,  is,  in  effect,  a 
consociated  church,  so  far  as  its  customs  and  usages  are  concerned, 
and  its  obligations  to  conform  to  them."  On  the  strength  of  this 
extemporized  canon,  they  took  jurisdiction  of  the  South  Church, 
and  proceeded  at  once  to  promulgate  their  several  "findings."  On 
the  third  day,  these  were  given  to  the  world  in  such  a  manner  as  to 


162 


mark  an  epoch  in  the  ecclesiastical  history  of  Connecticut.  They  gave, 
in  all,  ten  specific  allegations  as  found,  every  one  of  which  violates 
some  one  or  more  of  the  ten  rescripts  of  the  Decalogue.  The  most 
important  of  these  were,  in  substance,  as  follows: — That  a  "loyal" 
minority  of  a  church  constitutes  its  legal  majority ;  that  a  minister  acting 
as  "stated  supply"  has  no  right  to  be  called  "Pastor;"  that  Mr.  Car- 
roll, as  a  Presbyterian  clergyman,  should  have  exhibited  his  "  creden- 
tials" to  the  Congregational  clergymen,  before  entering  upon  his 
ministerial  duties  in  New  Haven ;  that  Mr.  Carroll  had  shown  a  culpa- 
ble want  of  "  loyalty"  in  not  preaching  and  praying  politics ;  that 
somebody  had  said  to  somebody  that  somebody  had  said  of  somebody 
that  somebody  had  said  or  done  what  was  calculated  to  lead  somebody 
else  astray,  on  the  all-important,  grace-imparting,  soul-saving  ciogma  of 
"  Loyalty !"  All  this  being  found — nay,  fully  substantiated  and  proved 
— the  South  Church  was  thereupon  abscinded,  detached,  cut  off,  insu- 
lated, and  altogether  unchurched  generally,  in  its  connection  with  the 
ecclesiastical  bodies  of  Connecticut!  The  report  of  the  Council,  in  its 
summary  of  "  findings,"  is  one  of  the  most  unique  and  logically  ar- 
ranged documents  ever  given  to  the  world.  The  charges  follow  each 
other  in  a  chain  of  deductions  as  brilliant  as  they  are  connected,  and 
forcibly  remind  one  of  the  court  scene  in  "Much  Ado  about  Nothing," 
where  Dogberry  gives  his  immortal  "  summing  up"  (slightly  para- 
phrased) as  follows : 

"  Marry,  sir,  they  have  comitted  false  report ;  moreover,  they  have  spoken  '  disloy. 
ally ;'  secondarily,  they  are  all  'rebels'  at  bottom  ;  sixth  and  lastly,  they  have  belied 
their  profession ;  thirdly,  they  have  verified  unjust  things  ;  and,  to  conclude,  they 
are  lying  knaves,  and  guilty  of  flat  burglary !" 


NOTES  TO  CANTO  THE  FIRST. 


Note  1.     Stanza  I. 

"  And  by  his  side  the  last  lost  Peri  sate." 

The  Peri  is  an  imaginary  being,  or  fairy,  represented  in  the  Persian 
mythology  as  the  descendant  of  a  fallen  angel,  excluded  from  Paradise 
until  her  penance  was  accomplished. 

Note  2.     Stanza  V. 
"If,  like  the  Bellonarii  of  Rome, 

The  blood  they  shed  had  only  been  their  own." 
The  Priests  of  Bellona,  called  Bellonarii,  consecrated  themselves  by 
incisions  in  their  own  bodies,  and  sacrificed  to  their  goddess  the  blood 
that  flowed  from  their  own  wounds. 

Note  3.    Stanza  VI, 
"  On  the  mad  revel  and  unseemly  mirth, 

That,  'mid  sepulchral  horrors,  filled  the  town." 
At  no  time  in  the  history  of  the  country,  were  there  ever  so  many 
masks,  routs,  balls,  pantomimes,  theatrical  comics,  and  operatic  buflas, 
as  during  the  war ;  to  say  nothing  of  the  mad  Parthenopes  that  fol- 
lowed in  the  wake  of  the  army,  and  their  disgusting  orgies  in  the 
national  capitol,  which  "  sported"  at  one  time  no  less  than  seventeen 
thousand  of  these  female  Sybarites,  many  of  whom  were  employed  in 
the  public  departments. 

Note  4.     Stanza  XIII. 
"  As  that  by  Perseus  borne  in  starry  field." 

Among  the  constellations,  Perseus  is  represented  with  a  sword  in 
his  right  hand,  and  the  head  of  Medusa  in  his  left: 

"Perseus  next, 

Brandishes  high  in  heaven  his  sword  of  flame, 
A  nd  holds  triumphant  the  dire  Gorgon's  head, 
Flashing  with  fiery  snakes." 


164 

Note  5.     Stanza  XV. 

"The  fierce  nine  hundred  thousand  Tribune  men — " 
The  Tribune  persistently  clamored  for  the  proclamation  of  emanci- 
pation, alleging  that  there  was  an  Abolition  reserve  of  nine  hundred 
thousand  men  at  the  North,  who  had  never  smelt  gunpowder,  that 
would  instantly  rush  to  the  field,  if  the  proclamation  were  issued. 
It  was  issued,  when  a  merciless  conscription  followed. 

Note  6.     Stanza  XIX. 

"  Only  it  seemed  his  tympanum  to  shatter." 

Celestial  ears  are  supposed  to  be  accustomed  to  the  constant  din 
and  clamor  of  war ;  but  the  ecclesiastical  strife,  growing  out  of  this 
"council,"  must  have  grated  harshly  on  the  celestial  tympanum. 

Note  7.     Stanza  XXVIII. 
"  Or  Magellanic  cloud,  that  holds  its  place." 

Magellanic  cloud  is  the  name  given  to  a  nebula  not  resolvable  into 
stars  by  means  of  the  larger  telescopes. 

Note  8.     Stanza  XXVIII. 

'  where  Orphiucus  rides 

His  scaly  monster,  with  his  glistening  sides." 
The  constellation  Orphiucus  represents  an  old  man  with  venerable 
beard,  having  both  hands  clenched  in  the  folds  of  a  prodigious  serpent, 
which  is  writhing  in  his  giant  grasp.     Homer  mentions  it ;  and  Manil- 
ius,  in  his  Astronomicon,  alludes  to  it  thus : — 

'•  Next  Orphiucus  strides  the  mighty  snake, 
Untwists  his  winding  folds,  and  smoothes  his  back." 

Note  9.     Stanza  XXIX. 
"  Along  the  old  Chaldean  Zodiac." 

The  Zodiac  is  of  Chaldean  origin.  No  practical  use  is  now  made  of 
It  in  Astronomy,  except  to  indicate  that  region  oi  the  heavens  within 
which  the  apparent  motions  of  the  sun,  moon,  and  the  principal  plan- 
ets, are  confined. 

Note  10.     Stanza  XXX. 


-"  where  seraphs  fly, 


Upon  their  angel  errands  through  the  sky." 
Ovid,  in  his  Metamorphoses,  thus  alludes  to  the  Milky- way : 
"  A  way  there  ia  in  heaven's  extended  plain, 
Which,  when  the  skies  are  clear,  is  seen  below, 
And  mortals  by  the  name  of  Milky,  know; 
The  groundwork  is  of  stars,  through  which  the  road 
IMS  open  to  the  Thunderer's  abode!" 


165 

Note  II.     Stanza  XXXII. 
'•  Her  achromatic  instrument  to  bear." 

The  achromatic  refracting  telescope  is  among  the  most  perfect  in- 
struments no\v  in  use. 

Note  12.     Stanza  XXXII. 
"  In  vain  attempts  to  get  her  parallax." 

To  get  the  parallax  of  a  heavenly  body,  is  one  of  the  favorite  ele- 
ments of  calculation  among  astronomers.  It  consists  in  finding  the 
difference  between  the  apparent  and  true  place  of  a  celestial  object. 

Note  13.     Stanza  XLVIL 
"  He  was  the  mighty  '  kraken'  of  the  church." 
"  Kraken"  is  the  name  applied,  during  what  may  be   called  the 
"fabulous  epoch  of  Zoology,"  to  a  marine  monster  of  gigantic  size. 
"  Old  Abe,"  with  his  happy  faculty  at  suggesting  rhymes,  as  shown 
in  his  interview  with  Lord  Hartington,  might  hit  upon  a  perfect  rhyme 
for  "  kraken,"  and  not  go  a  thousand  miles  from  New  Haven. 

Note  1 4.     Stanza  XL  VIII. 
"  He  grappled  with  the  'South  Church'  as  the  kraken 

Did  with  the  Dutch  ship  in  the  northern  sea." 
In  Rees"  Cyclopedia,  may  be  found  an  account  of  this  fabulous 
monster's  seizing  a  Dutch  ship,  in  the  manner  described. 

Note  15.     Stanza  L1I. 

"  Jack  Porpoise  acting  as  the  chief  of  scribes." 
The  author  hopes  no  one  will  think  of  making  a  personal  applica- 
tion of  thia  figure  of  "  Jack  Porpoise,"  to  the  Scribe  of  the  actual 
Council. 

Note  16.     Stanza  LXIL 

"  Whose  straight  two-forty  gait  showed  he  was  all  fin." 
There  is  a  story  current  among  the  "  sports'*  of  New  Haven,  that 
there  was  once  a  spirited  little  "  brush"  between  two  noted  clergymen 
of  the  city,  on  one  of  the  out-town  Avenues,  in  which  the  "  Deacon's 
bays"  were  most  cruelly  distanced  by  the  ''Parson's  blacks." 

Note  17.     Stanza  LXXXIV. 
"  And  like  Prometheus,  chained  on  dreary  isle." 
Prometheus,  having  stolen  fire  from  heaven,  was  chained  to  a  rock- 
by  Jupiter,  and  there  tormented  by  a  vulture  that  fed  continually  upon 
his  liver. 

11 


166 

Note  18.     Stanza  LXXX1X. 
"  The  only  classic  genius  it  had  known." 

It  is  hardly  necessary  to  mention  the  name  of  PERCIVAL,  in  this 
connection. 

Note  19.     Stanza  XCL 
"  Held  in  a  chapel  in  a  street  hard  by." 

Since  writing  the  "Vision,"  the  author  has  ascertained  that  he  w:is 
slightly  in  error  as  to  the  place  where  the  exparte  Council  was  held. 
It  was  reported  as  having  been  held  in  the  Orange  street  Chapel,  and, 
not  knowing  that  there  were  two  streets  in  the  city  of  that  name,  he 
very  naturally  confounded  it  with  the  Temple,  which  was  used  at  that 
time  for  religious  purposes,  and  was  the  only  building  of  the  kind  in 
Orange  screet  proper.  "We  make  this  correction  the  more  cheerfully. 
as  it  exonerates  the  devil  from  all  participation  in  the  proceedings  of 
the  Council,  at  that  time  and  place. 

Note  20.     Stanza  CIX. 
"Hard  by  the  graves  of  the  '  old  Regicides.'  " 
The   graves   of  the  Kegicides  are  directly  in  the  rear  of  Center 
Church.     Some  years  ago  a  monument  was  erected  there  to  the  memo- 
ry of  John  Dixwell;  but  the  grave  of  his  fellow  compatriot  lies  still 
neglected. 

Note  21.     Stanza  GXI. 

"In  boxes  marked  'From  Old  Fort  Kill  'em,  damn  'em.'" 
In  the  celebrated  "  Sharp's  Rifle"  meeting,  in  the  North  Church. 
Henry  Ward  Beecher  played  the  role  of  auctioneer  in  the  biddings  for 
rifles  and  men  to  go  to  Kansas.  "When  a  person  of  the  name  of  Kil- 
lam  responded  to  one  of  his  urgent  appeals  for  men,  Beecher  remarked 
that  the  name  was  decidedly  suggestive  of  the  "  good  work"  they  had 
in  hand;  while  a  Republican,  more  enthusiastic  than  discreet,  in  the 
galleries,  cried  out :  ''Yes,  kill 'em,  damn 'em!"  Ever  since  then  the 
church  has  gone  by  the  name  of  the  "  Old  Fort." 

Note  22.     Stanza  CXII. 

"  Like  bombs  and  rockets  at  Sebastopol."  » 

Vide  Henry  Ward  Beecher's  speech,  in  the  North  Church  meeting, 
in  which  the  identical  sentiment  and  language  are  used. 

Note  23.     Stanza  CXIX. 

"  When  it  was  sawed  down  by  the  Center  people." 
According  to  Dr.  Button's  History  of  the  North  Church,  so  great 
was  the  hostility  of  the  "  Center  people"  to  the  building  of  a  new 
church  edifice  in  the  city,  that  they  actually  sawed  it  down  in  the 
night,  shortly  after  it  was  erected. 


NOTES  TO  CANTO  THE  SECOND. 


Note  1.     Stanza  I. 

"  High  on  a  throne  of  royal  state,  etc." 

The  author  prefers  to  locate  Satan  where  the  "orthodox"  Milton 
places  him,  rather  than  invent  any  more  exalted  sphere  for  his  activities. 
Note  2.     Stanza  IV. 


-"by  that  fell  apple, 


That  damned  the  race  and  stuck  in  Adam's  thrapple." 
This  is  unquestionably  the  origin  of  "  Adam's  Apple."  But  why  it 
should  have  stuck  in  Adam's  throat,  and  at  the  same  time  glided  so 
smoothly  down  Eve's,  has  always  been  a  mystery  to  me  on  physiolog- 
ical principles.  As  a  theological  mystery,  it  is  explained  satisfactorily 
enough,  perhaps,  on  the  hypothesis  that  the  woman  is  always  the 
more  giillable  of  the  two. 

Note  3.     Stanza  V. 
"  And  summoned  Flamsteed's  ghost  by  sundry  raps, 

And  old  Mercator's." 

John  Flamsteed,  an  eminent  English  mathematician  and  astronomical 
writer  of  the  17th  century,  was  the  first  to  invent  celestial  maps;  as 
Mcrcator,  a  German  mathematician  and  astronomer  of  the  same  cen- 
tury, was  the  first  to  invent  terrestrial  maps,  or  represent  a  spheroidal 
body,  like  the  earth,  on  a  plane  surface. 

Note  4.     Stanza  VI. 

"  Whence  lost  Eurydice  was  snatched  by  force." 
It  is  stated  of  Orpheus,  the  husband  of  Eurydice,  that  he  descended 
into  hell  after  his  lost  wife,  and  actually  bore  her  away  from  the  em- 
braces of  Pluto. 

Note  5.    Stanza  VIII. 

"  "Who  make  Procrustean  beds  for  men  to  lie  on." 
Procrustes  was  an  old  northern  radical  and  robber,  who  placed  his 
southern  captives  on  an  iron  couch,  and,  if  too  short,  stretched  them 
out,  but  if  too  long,  lopped  them  off  to  fit.  He  is  the  genuine  proto- 
type and  ideal  symbol  of  all  radical  reformers.  Old  Procrustes  thought 
everybody  ought  to  be  of  the  same  height  and  physical  stature,  and 


168 


his  "lopping  off"  process  was  about  as  humane  and  rational  as  some 
of  our  modern  reforms,  which  demand  that  everybody  shall  be  equal 
to  everybody  else  in  every  thing,  color  not  excepted. 

Note  6.     Stanza  XIII. 
"  The  imp  Asmodeus." 

Asmodeus  is  here  made  the  shadow  of  the  devil,  for  the  reason  that 
he  always  follows  him,  and  is  his  special  imp  of  mischief. 

Note  7.     Stanza  XIV. 

"  Showed  that  knee-bending  is  his  supple  trade." 
The  author  has  coupled  the  word  Canaan  with  Nachash,  because 
the  latter  term  is  not  sufficiently  expressive  to  include  all  the  dark- 
skinned  races,  many  of  whom  are  neither  serpent-worshippers,  nor 
essentially  servile  in  their  nature.  The  topographical  and  other  ob- 
jections to  the  use  of  the  word  Canaan,  will  mostly  disappear  when  we 
recollect  that  the  Hebrew  language  was  originally  employed,  more 
perhaps  than  any  other,  to  represent  abstract  ideas.  The  word  Canah. 
or  Chanah.  represents,  or  has  enclosed  in  it,  a  psychological  truth  ex- 
isting in  nature ;  and,  with  the  addition  of  a  single  letter,  becomes  the 
cognomen  of  all  servile  races.  The  Kal  form  of  the  verb  has  been 
translated  into  Latin  by  genuflexit,  in  genua  procidet,  depressus  est  ani- 
mus, submisse  se  gessit ;  or,  in  the  English — he  bends  the  knee — he  falls 
on  his  knees — his  mind  is  depressed — he  acts  submissively.  The  term 
is  expressive  of  the  inner  traits  of  the  man,  rather  than  his  outward 
characteristics.  The  prognathous  negro,  in  his  proclivities  for  serpent- 
worshipping  and  the  readiness  with  which  he  "  bends  the  knee" — 
submits  to  servitude — completely  fills  the  psychological  idea  contained 
in  the  two  words,  Nachash-Canaan. 

Note  8.     Stanza  XXII. 

"As  hangs  the  'goose'  in  highfalutin'  strain." 
"  Everything  is  lovely,  and  the  goose  hangs  high,"  is  a  quotation 
from  that  mythical  individual  known  as  the  "  first  stump  orator." 

Note  9.     Stanza  XXIII 

"This  '  Afric  nonsense'  is  the  milk  of  boobies." 
Daniel  Webster  once  said,  in  speaking  of  Abolitionists,  that  he  never 
knew  one  who  did  not  have  a  '•  screw  loose"  somewhere  in  his  intel- 
lectual or  moral  machinery. 

Note  10.     Stanza  XL  VII. 

"  Of  '  Zion's  bloodhounds'  on  the  white  man's  track." 
The  writer  strongly  objected  to  this  term  when  he  first  heard  it  ap- 
plied to  New  England  clergymen.     But  when  he   listened  to  the 


169 


envenomed  speech  of  a  learned  D.  D.,  of  New  Haven,  and  heard  him 
demand  a  Northern  army  large  enough  to  reach  from  the  Atlantic  to 
the  Rocky  Mountains,  in  order  to  sweep,  as  with  a  besom  of  destruc- 
tion, every  white  man,  woman  and  child,  in  the  South,  into  the  Gulf  of 
Mexico,  he  thought  the  word  "bloodhound"  altogether  too  mild  a 
term.  Hellhound  would  be  more  appropriate  and  justly  merited. 

Note  II.     Stanza  XLVIH. 
"  Or  future  Sambos  to  adorn  some  niche 

Transcendently  above  the  white  man's  reach." 
Those  who  have  heard  Wendell  Phillips  on  the  subject  of  "  misce- 
genation," or  tke  infusion  of  negro  blood  into  the  white  man's  veins, 
will  understand  that,  when  this  is  once  thoroughly  accomplished,  the 
white  race  will  have  reached  its  ne  plus  ultra  of  developement  1 

Note  12.     Stanza  XLIX. 

"  He  is  not  our  sister,  nor  our  brother's  mother." 
The  author  presents  his  compliments  to  "  Artemus  Ward,"  and  hopes 
there  has  been  no  copyright  infringement. 

Note  13.     Stanza  LIV. 
"  Above  your  schools  of  dead  divinity." 

The  theological  school  of  the  present  day  is  a  grand  dissecting  roomi 
in  which  your  "  grim  doctor  of  divinity"  stands  over  the  dead  body  of 
religion  with  scalpel  in  hand,  ready  to  cut  it  up  into  shreds  and  tatters, 
that  young  "  theologs"  may  carry  them  away  for  lifeless  exhibition  in 
the  pulpit  I  One  may  get  the  whole  body  of  divinity  at  such  a  school, 
but  it  will  be  a  dead  body,  without  any  vital  religion. 

Note  14.     Stanza  LXII. 
"From  the  great  '  Moon  Hoax'  to  the  incessant  jar 

'Bout  human  rights  in — Borioboolaghal" 

This  institution  "  swallowed"  the  great  "  Moon  Hoax"  that  was  got 
off,  some  twenty-five  years  ago  or  more,  in  one  of  the  leading  sensa- 
tional papers  of  the  day ;  while  for  the  last  ten  or  fifteen  years,  the 
principal  theme  for  glowing  orations  at  Commencement,  has  been  this 
fruitful  one  of  "  human  rights  in — Borioboolagha  I"  In  fact,  nearly  one 
half  of  the  present  graduates,  seem  to  be  lineal  descendants  of  the 
"Jellaby  Family." 

Note  15.     Sta'nza  LXIII. 
"At  mis'genation,  which  must  come  to-morrow." 

"Quis 

Peccandi  finem  imposuit  sibi  ?     Quando  recepit 
Ejectum  semel  attrita  de  fronte  ruborem  ?" 
Juvenal. 
11* 


170 

Note  16.     Stanza  LXVI. 
"If  not  to  keep  himself  as  free  from  scandal, 

"When  women  chanced  to  come  within  his  way." 
The  number  of  "  loyal"  clergymen  who  fell  during  the  war,  has 
never  been  accurately  computed ;   but  the  number  who  have  fallen 
since,  has  been  estimated,  by  some  graceless  scamp,  at  a  most  frightful 
figure.     Vide  the  Police  Gazette  reports. 

Note  17.     Stanza  LXXII. 

"  Just  as  the  Nereids — Neptune's  fair-haired  daughters." 
The  Nereids,  or  Nereides,  were  the  daughters  of  Nereus,  and  nymphs 
of  the  sea.     Amphitrite  and  Galataea  were   among  the  most  famous  of 
these  beautiful  goddesses.    They  were  generally  worshipped  in  con- 
nection with  Neptune,  who  took  Amphitrite  for  his  queen. 
Note  18.     Stanza  XO. 


'  ample  laurels  twined 


For  his  own  brow,  in  future  jousts  of  mind!" 
In    the   more   recent  contests   of    this  theological  gladiator,   the 
"  laurels1'  have,  by  general  consent,  settled  on  another's  brow. 

Note  19.   Stanza  XCIII. 

"  When  such  a  youth  inspired  '  Platonic  flame.' " 
The  supreme  nature  of  "  Platonic  love"  is  understood  to  be  incom- 
prehensible to  ordinary  minds.    But  when  one  has  once  attained  that 
intellectual  and  moral  height,  from  which  he  perceives  the  three  great 
Platonic  ideas  of  truth,  beauty,  and.  order,  in  all  their  harmonical  re- 
lations, this  kind  of  love  is  no  longer  a  vague  impression,  but  a  real- 
izing sense  of  the  "fitness  of  things  generally." 
Note  20.     Stanza   CXII. 
"  Sewed  on  by  this  half-tailor." 

In  a  "  passage"  between  two  celebrated  wits — the  one  a  son  of  St. 
Crispin,  and  the  other,  a  knight  of  the  '•  Forlorn  Goose,"  these  two 
distiches  were  got  off: 

"  This  life,  though  long,  is  but  a  span, 

An't  takes  nine  'cobblers'  to  make  a  man!" 
"  This  world,  though  wide,  is  full  of  evil, 
And  half  a  tailor  makes  a  devil !" 

Note  21.     Stanza  CXVHI. 
"  But  I  have  learned  that  mental  subtleties 

Mean  simply  this — to  count  the  steps  of  fleas  ! 

Aristophanes  speaks,  in  one  of  his  plays,  of  a  class  of  men  who 
arrive  at  such  a  pitch  of  folly  as  actually  '•  to  count  the  steps  of  fleas.'1 


171 

Note  22.     Stanza  CXXIII. 


That  fired  the  fiddling  mountebank  of  Rome." 
The  shame  of  Nero  did  not  consist  in  fiddling,  but  in«ot  leaving  off 
fiddling,  when  Rome  was  on  fire.     So  the  shame  of  the  New  England 
clergy  did  not  consist  so  much  in  lighting  up  the  flames  of  civil  war,        \ 
as  in  adding  fuel  to  them  while  they  were  already  raging. 


NOTES  TO  CANTO  THE  THIRD. 


Note  1.     Stanza  II. 

"  And  bid  the  world  '  tear  down  the  flaunting  lie.'  " 
For  an  intensely  "  loyal"  poem  on  the  American  Flag,  examine  the      ' 
files  of  the  New  York  Tribune  some  year  or  two  before  the  \tai«^  The 
South  was  then  called  on,  with  the  rest  of  mankind,  "  to  tear  down  the 
flaunting  lie." 

Note  2.     Stanza  V. 

"  as  with  proper  share  of 

Our  '  patent  loyalty.'  " 

The  Republican  party  is  entitled  to^aot  only  one,  but  to  at  least  a       « 
dozen  patents,  on  the  word  "  loyalty."    For  the  definition  of  the  word         \ 
has  undergone  as  many  shifts  and  changes  as  the  party  itself,  in  the 
last  four  or  five  years. 

Note  3.     Stanza  VII. 
"  When  they  upreared  the  pillars  of  the  state 

For  their  race  only,  and  then  smashed  the  slate !" 

This  topic  has  been  fi  the  bellowing  of  the  labyrinth"  with  the  Abo-       \ 
litionists,  for  the  last  thirty  years.     The  labors  of  our  Fathers  promised 

\ 


172 


to  be  a  magnificent  work,  and  were  so  esteemed,  until  the  government 
they  made  fell  into  Abolition  hands,  when  it  turned  out  to  be  an  insig- 
nificant affair. 

Note  4.    Stanza  X. 

"  The  mad  Centauri,  in  Thessalian  bogs." 

The  Centaurs  were  a  fabulous  race  of  beings,  inhabiting  a  part  of 
Thessaly,  and  carrying  on  a  constant  war  with  their  neighbors,  the 
Lapithae.  They  were  represented  as  half  horse  and  half  man,  with 
the  animal  instincts  predominating. 

Note  5.     Stanza  XXIV. 

"  This  stirred  Saint  Peter's  choler,  till  he  got 

As  mad  as  a  March  hare." 

That  Saint  Peter  was  quick  and  choleric  in  action,  is  evidenced  by 
the  fact  of  his  cutting  off  the  ear  of  Malchus. 

Note  6.     Stanza  XXV. 
"  After  the  Beecher  fashion,  that  is,  with 

A  firm  conviction  that  the  devil's  a  myth." 

Among  the  more  recent  convictions  of  Beecher,  is  the  belief  that  for 
Q-od  to  have  provided  a  hell  for  the  Christianity  of  the  19th  century, 
was  in  "  horridly  bad  taste." 

Note  7.     Stanza  XXVI. 
"  And  sending  word,  as  notice  to  the  'Governor,' 

That  he  to  them  the  affairs  of  heaven  might  turn  over  1" 
This  is  carrying  one's  conceit  of  righteousness  to  the  very  pitch  of 
the  sublime.    But  Virgil  gives  a  similar  instance  of  the  same  kind  of 
folly: 

"Flectere  si  nequeo  superos,  Archeronta  movebo." 
Note  8.     Stanza  XXXI. 

"  a  chine 

Or  two  of  good  jerked  Missionary  loin." 

The  Fan,  and  several  other  tribes  of  negroes,  in  Central  Africa,  are 
still  incorrigible  cannibals,  after  all  the  efforts  that  have  been  made  to 
Christianize  them. 

Note  9.    Stanza  XXXIV. 
"  As  they  grew  crotchety,  to  air  their  whims." 
The  writer  once  ran  across  an  old  Monkish  legend  in  which  this  idea 
of  the  office  of  Saint  Peter,  was  more  seriously  thau  quaintly  expressed. 


173 


Note  10.     Stanza  XXXIX. 
"  This  upstart  orator,  that  dares  to  pray 

For  peace  on  earth  in  heaven's,  not  our  way  1" 
When  any  religious  denomination  takes  its  own  collective  conscience 
as  the  standard  of  human  infallibility,  and  erects  thereon  a  Judicium 
Dei,  for  the  punishment  of  the  rest  of  mankind,  hell  itself  becomes  a 
paradise  in  comparison  with  the  earth  they  inhabit. 

Note  11.    Stanza  XL  VIII. 

"  more  intensely  chafed 

At  prayers  for  peace  and  Union,  than  at  hearty 
Shouts  for"  a  '  Rebel'  victory." 

The  only  thing  approximating  a  shout  for  a  ''  Rebel  victory"  that         / 
the  author  recollects  to  have  heard  at  the  North  during  the  war,  was 
immediately  after  the  terrible  defeat  of  Burnside,  when  a  prominent    — . 
Republican  expressed  unbounded  joy  at  the  result,  as  it  would  bring 
"  Old  Abe"  to  his  senses,  and  the  War  department  to  the  necessity  of 
"'    demanding  another  half  a  million  of  meu  to  put  down  the  '•  rebellion." 

Note  12.     Stanza  LI. 

"  Boston — the  cleverest  place  alive 

For  atheistic  piety  to  thrive." 

The  Boston  clergy  have  so  transcendentalized  their  religion,  and 
walked  so  long  themselves  on  a  sea  of  mystery,  that  the  miracle  of  the 
Savior,  in  walking  on  the  sea  of  Galilee,  is  scarcely  a  matter  worthy  of 
their  faith.  With  them,  Christ  is  a  divine  man,  just  far  enough  in  ad- 
vance of  Plato  to  split  the  difference  between  the  latter  and  the  pulpit 
philosophers  of  the  "  Hub." 

Note  13.    Stanza  LIV. 

"  what  time  the  Puritan 

Grew  timely  valiant,  and  from  danger  ran." 

The  men  who  came  over  in  the  Mayflower  would  have  shown  more 
pluck,  and  saved  the  world  less  trouble,  had  they  remained  in  England, 
and  helped  those  great  Puritans,  Cromwell,  Pym,  Hampden  and  Eliot, 
fight  out  their  battle  with  prelacy  and  kingcraft.  True  heroism 
stands  up  to  its  work  everywhere  It  does  not  skulk,  nor  run  off  into 
a  wilderness  to  vote  itself  the  work  of  the  Lord,  or  its  possessors,  the 
Lord's  people.  Luther  did  not  run  away  from  Worms,  to  go  to  Hol- 
land, or  to  any  foreign  shore  to  find  a  "  Blarney-stone."  He  stayed 
and  fought  it  out,  at  the  gates  of  his  own  citadel  No  wonder  that  the 
Puritans,  who  ran  away  from  their  own  country  to  get  rid  of  the  battle 
of  Armageddon,  should  banish  Ann  Hutchinson  to  death,  hang  old 
women,  and  hunt  Roger  Williams  into  Rhode  Island. 


174 

Note  14.     Stanza  LX. 

"First  call  Ann  Hutchinson  and  Richard  Mather." 
Among  the  first  ecclesiastical  councils,  of  an  ex  parte  character,  ever 
held  on  this  continent,  was  that  in  which  the  doctrines  of  Ann  Hutch- 
inson were  pronounced  heretical,  and  she  banished  from  the  colony  of 
Massachusetts,  to  seek  protection  among  the  Indians.  The  same 
spirit  that  pursued  this  woman  into  the  howling  wilderness,  has  since 
sought,  in  the  name  of  a  universal  human  brotherhood,  to  reduce  the 
country  into  a  state  of  almost  universal  human  tigerhood;  and,  what  is 
more,  has  very  nearly  accomplished  the  object  of  its  seeking." 

Note  15.    Stanza  ZCIV. 
"  So  stultify  them  with  its  blood-ebriety, 

That  they  mistake  bedevilments  for  piety !" 

In  Massachusetts,  to  serve  a  political  opponent  to  a  balmage  of  tar 
and  a  copious  ornamentation  of  feathers,  is  regarded  the  highest  duty 
a  "Christian"  can  perform,  unless  it  be  a  "salivary  baptism,"  or  a 
draught  of  aquafortis,  from  the  pulpit,  poured  on  the  head  of  some 
Democratic  church-goer. 

Note  16.    Stanza  0V. 

"  As  turning  into  black  cats    '  on  the  sly.'  " 

This  was  actually  one  of  the  verified  charges  against  the  old  women 
of  Salem. 

Note  17.     Stanza  CXIL 


-"on  the  authority 


Of  Minors  great  minority-majority.' 
The  algebraical  formulary,   showing  one  to  be  equal  to  two,  is  not 
more  ingenious  than  the  method  by  which  a  "  loyal"  minority,  in  this 
case,  was  shown  to  be  a  legal  majority. 

Note  18.    Stanza  GXVIL 
''  Retaining  all  the  dignity  of  earth, 

When  intellectual  giants  had  their  birth." 

A  story  is  told  of  Dennie,  of  the  Portfolio,  and  Dr.  D.,  when  the  two 
were  forced  to  become  bedfellows  at  a  New  Jersey  inn,  which  illus- 
trates the  character  of  the  latter  for  "  superlative  dignity."  But  the 
story  is  too  long  to  repeat  here. 

Note  19.     Stanza  CXVIII. 
"How,  syllogistically,  to  trip  and  throw  'em." 
The  Prex  was  great  at  intellectual  wrestling,  and  joined  in  this  sort 
of  exercise  with  his  pupils,  to  show  how  handsomely  he  could  trip 
them  up  with  a  syllogism,  or  knock  them  fiat  with  a  "  non  sequitur." 


THE  LIBRARY 

13NIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA 
ANORT.KS 


175 

Note  20.     Stanza   CXIX. 

"  and  promptly  take  their  tiles  off, 

Whenever  they  saw  him,  though  they  might  be  miles  off." 
This  was  formerly  one  of  the  laws  of  College,  and  was  most  rigidly 
enforced  before  the  unostentatious  "  days  of  Day  and  Stanley." 

Aote  21.     Stanza  CXXV. 
"  Of  laurels  for  some  Southern  victor  twined, 
"Won  in  her  splendid  tournaments  of  mind  I" 

It  does  not  require  the  recollection  of  the  "  oldest  inhabitant"  of 
New  Haven,  to  recall  the  time  when  it  was  a  matter  of  special  con- 
gratulation with  the^r  friends  from  the  South,  that  some  student  from 
that  section,  had  borne  off  the  highest  honors  of  College. 

Note  22.     Stanza  CXXXII. 
"  And  tell  us  why  your  Center  Church  or  people, 

Shot  all  the  white-wing'd  doves  within  their  steeple." 
This  was  an  actual  occurrence,  during  the  second  year  of  the  war. 
The  sexton  of  that  church,  either  personally  or  by  proxy,  spent  the 
better  part  of  two  days  in  shooting  doves  from  the  belfry. 

Note  23.     Stanza  CXXXV. 
"  And  wearing  all  the  while  for  them  to  note, 

A  most  provoking  '  ministerial  coat!'  " 

The  clerical  objections  raised  against  the  Rev.  Mr.  Carroll,  while 
outside  the  pulpit,  were  pretty  evenly  divided  between  hia  "  minis- 
terial coat"  and  '•  fast  horses." 

Note  24.     Stanza  CXXXVII. 
"Taking  the  '  ribbons'  from  his  own  'crack'  driver, 

To  show — he  cared  not  for  us  a  Dutch  stiver  I" 
It  was  this  perfect  indifference  of  Mr.  Carroll's,  as  to  what  opinion 
the  New  Haven  clergy  might,  or  might  not,  entertain  of  him,  that  so 
terribly  annoyed  them,  during  the  first  year  or  two  of  his  ministry  in 
the  city. 

Note  25.     Stanza  CXLV. 


rhen  they  tried 


The  immortal  Whitfield  on  a  rail  to  ride." 
This  historical  incident  should  not  be  forgotten.     The  spirit  which 
prompted  the  persecution  of  Whitfield,  is  the  same  as  that  leveled 
against  Mr.  Carroll,  the  only  difference  being,  the  intervening  time  be- 
tween the  ministry  of  the  two  men. 


ERRATA. 
On  page  35,  20th  line,  for  figures  "  10"  (reference)  read  fig.  "  19." 


44,  4th 
47,  23d 
59,  7th 
75,  20th 
81,  )8th 
82,  18th 
84,  4th 
"       102,  23d 
"       127,  10th 
"       144,  24th 

"the  same  church,"  read  "  this  same  church.' 
"    "  sons  of  Beecher's"     "    "  sons  of  Beechers.'1 
"     "  of  her  literati,"        "    "  of  all  her  literati.' 
"    '-how/ar  of  any,"      "    "how  few  if  any." 
"    "  though  shut  from,"   "    "  though  shot  from.' 
"    "as  in  the  sea,"          "    "  as  is  the  sea." 
"    "  of  ghostly  hue  "        "    "  of  ghastly  hue." 
"    "draw;  the  rein,"         "    "  drew  the  rein." 
"    "h&mehow,"                 "    "somehow." 
"    "fig.  "O/'Cref.)          "    "fig.  "20." 

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